writing a best man's speech uk

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How to give the best man’s speech of your life

By Justin Myers, The Guyliner

The Royal Wedding is mere weeks away with Prince Harry confirming Prince William as his best man, returning the favour from his own nuptials in 2011. Accustomed as he is to giving speeches and working a room, it’s unlikely Wills needs much guidance, so here’s a foolproof guide to all the best men who need a helping hand.

Who are you?

OK, so Prince William may not have to do this because he is pretty famous, but many best men forget to open with who they are and why they’re doing the speech. Most guests will not have a clue who you are – you could be a waiter about to announce a mix-up with the gluten-free option for all they know.

Don’t do it drunk

One shot for Dutch courage will do if you’re struggling. Slurring your way through it will make everyone remember you, yes, but for the worst reasons.

Ditch the autocue

Reading from a sheet of paper risks losing the personality in your voice and betraying your nerves thanks to shaky hands. Get something in your hand – cue cards maybe, not a tequila – and glance at it rather than recite. You’ll look more natural and nobody will mind if you break their gaze every now and again for a quick check.

Read the room

If a couple of jokes miss the spot, don’t panic, and don’t mention just how badly you’re dying up there. Repeatedly signposting that your gags are landing as smoothly as a hot air balloon touching down in a hurricane only reminds everyone how terminally unfunny you are. Watch their reactions and try a bit of improvisation to work in things that got a good reception. You don’t have to be funny all the time, either – it’s not an open-mic night.

Workshop your speech

Don’t labour over this all by yourself. This is an honour, not a chore. Get information or favourite stories about the groom from other friends. This helps you present more than one side to him. You’ll also get an idea of some of the truly awful stuff people think appropriate for a best man’s speech. Consign bants to the bin. That said, don’t censor yourself too hard – there's nothing worse than a bland speech packed with plaudits and zero spice. If in doubt, immediately disregard the most salacious and the most sensible and go for something in between.

Remember this isn’t about you and your life – one of the worst speeches I ever witnessed was the bride’s father guiding us through an overlong autobiography in which his daughter was a mere appendix. However, it’s not just about the groom, either: if he’s a humourless drone and you’re desperate for anecdotes, take inspiration from current affairs or celebrity culture. Just remember the grannies might not know who Gemma Collins is, though; keep those references A-list.

Avoid mentioning at all, especially if they’re still friends and actually at the wedding. Plus it’s not the Seventies, so swerve sexism and using language like bunny boilers, psychoes and slappers to describe women who passed on the chance to be in the white dress today: you’ll lose the crowd immediately. As far as the guests should be concerned, both bride and groom were hatched from an egg seconds before the ceremony and have never so much as touched another human intimately.

Embarrassment is fine, utter humiliation maybe not

Overall, your tone should be good-natured and positive – you’re painting a picture of the groom, not trying to ruin his life. The stories you tell are ones he should half expect to come up anyway. Avoid scatological humour; it’s a wedding, not the stag do. Reminders of criminal activity are verboten unless it's from childhood, petty and victimless. Anything that happened on the stag weekend is not for here. Nobody cares how big his penis is except his wife and she very likely already knows. Also, this is probably not the time to talk about when you both went through the wrong door in a club in Berlin and only found your way out three weeks later.

Compliments are compulsory

It’s mildly sexist and absolutely ridiculous, but you’ll be expected to reiterate several times just how beautiful the bride and bridesmaids look. Please don’t use the word “stunning” unless they’re carrying taser guns in their bouquets, and express appreciation of their beauty as you would a striking painting, rather than a glamour model. Nobody cares if you “would”.

Easy on the toasts

One of the most annoying parts of any wedding speech is being asked to raise your glasses every two minutes in honour of all manner of stupid things. Brides and bridesmaids, yes, fine, and dead relatives if you must, but Doug the chauffeur, the clergy, the speed-dating hostess who introduced them, the DJ playing at the club where they first kissed and Joanna Lumley can probably be left aside.

It’s very popular, for some sad reason, for best men to suggest they’re in love with the groom or vice versa. This only works if you’re both gay, and even then it doesn’t actually work because the other groom will spend the rest of his big day wondering if you’ve actually done it and/or worrying you will tell everyone that in fact he’s the one who’s done it with you. Anyway, jokes about bumming or homosexual longing – however dressed up in “bromance” or “man crush” or other depressingly heterosexual ways go trying to express affection – are an absolute no-no.

Ten minutes is fine, honestly. You’re holding up the dancing and the waiting staff are always reluctant to work the room while speeches are going on – it’s usually their only opportunity for a quick cigarette or a vicious roasting of everyone’s outfits round the back of the marquee – so patience will be limited and glasses may well be empty. Never go on longer than the father of the bride . If you’re worried your speech is too long, skip all the in-jokes or pretend to faint after exactly eight minutes.

The perfect best man’s speech is a balance of one-liners, the revelation of a couple of secrets and, best of all, a tear in the eye at the end. If you are emotionally stunted, then rounding off with “he’s like a brother to me”, thanking him for everything he’s done and a hearty double handshake (clutch your left hand over both your right hands) plus man-hug should get everyone dewy-eyed by the time you raise your glass for the final time.

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The Ultimate Best Man’s Speech Template

Author: Hollie Bond

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No idea where to start when it comes to writing your best man speech? Use our failsafe best man’s speech template for inspiration to write and deliver an Oscar-worthy performance.

You’ve been given the huge honour of being the best man at your best friend’s wedding – congratulations! Now you’ve celebrated together and have had fun coming up with all sorts of fun ideas for the stag do , it’s time to knuckle down to the harder work of coming up with a best man speech that’ll show your best mate how much he means to you and that’ll entertain all the wedding guests in equal measure.

Not many of us are natural speech writers or deliverers. In fact, this might be the very first speech you’ve ever been asked to do. If you’re staring at a blank document and have no idea where or how to start when it comes to writing a brilliant and funny best man speech, don’t panic. Plenty of other best men have been in your shoes before.

To help you create a funny, but well-structured and entertaining speech, we’ve put together an easy-to-use best man speech template. Use this to create a structure for your speech and then fill your speech full of personal anecdotes and your own unique jokes and sense of humour.

How To Write An Amazing Best Man Speech

Before you dive headfirst into writing your best man speech , there are a few rules you need to consider to ensure your speech is as entertaining as it can possibly be. The key to a good best man speech is that it sounds casual and effortless, but there’s still a good structure, and this can only be achieved if you follow these simple, but effective rules:

1) Timing: Keep your speech short! Make sure your speech is around seven to fifteen minutes long. Any shorter and it sounds like you’ve not put the effort in. Any longer and you’re at risk of boring the guests and sounding monotonous.

2) Make sure you don’t leave it till the last minute. A good speech takes preparation and practice. If you’ve always been the sort of person who procrastinates, then now is the time to make a change. You should start this speech at least a month in advance of the wedding to give yourself time to make edits and learn the speech by heart so you can deliver it effortlessly.

3) Don’t include any private jokes or stories the wedding guests won’t understand. Think about your audience at all times. This is not a private speech between you and the groom. Everyone needs to understand what you’re talking about or you risk alienating them.

4) Don’t talk about yourself too much. This is not your day, but the brides and grooms. If you’re going to go on about anyone, it should be the groom!

5) Spend the most time working on the introduction and the end. These are the bits most guests will remember.

6) Any jokes about the groom or members of the wedding party should be wholesome and family-friendly rather than rude, crude, and offensive. Remember anecdotes and short stories or observational jokes about the groom work much better in this speech than one-liners that you’ve randomly found online. Give the guests time to warm up to a joke rather than expecting them to roar with laughter at a single out-of-context sentence.

7) Think about having an overarching theme. The best man speeches have a thread running through them that links all the different elements. If you can, try and think of a loose theme for your speech (don’t force it though if it’s not working). Something you can reference at the start and then come back to at various points makes for an excellent and joined-up speech. Ideas could be a certain well-known trait of the best man. Or perhaps a story about the groom that you can drip feed throughout the speech, with a hilarious result revealed at the end.

Best Man Speech Template

Best man speech opening lines.

To get your audience on your side from the off, start your speech with a strong and amusing opening line if you can. We’ve rounded up some of the greatest best man speech opening jokes for you to take your pick from. A classic way to get guests on your side is to mention how you’re feeling about the speech or what you’ve been feeling in the run-up to delivering a speech, as they will immediately have empathy for you and be willing you to do well. Make it funny and self-deprecating though, rather than making them doubt your abilities to deliver a speech!

Welcoming the guests

Once you’ve said the first sentence you’ll feel a bit more comfortable and can get into your stride. The most important thing to ensure you do at the start of the speech is to welcome the guests. This is can be a simple sentence welcoming them and thanking them for coming to the wedding on behalf of the bride and groom. This can also be a good time to mention how honored you are to be the best man and also to pay some compliments to the bride and the bridesmaids.

Introduce yourself and how you met the groom

Next on the agenda should be introducing yourself in more detail and telling those members of the audience how you met the groom. Make sure the guests know your name and how you’re related or linked to the groom. If you’ve got a funny story about how you met, bring it out now. Talk about your initial thoughts about the groom and how you hit it off (or didn’t!).

Talk about the best man

Now you’re into your stride, this section should form the main section of your speech. After all, the best man speech is all about the groom and what a great guy he is. Talk about his character – the good bits and the not so good (remember wholesome jokes only) and spend time reflecting on how he has grown as a person since you’ve known him.

Focus on the comedy value here, and don’t be afraid to exaggerate traits or stories a little for the comedy value. As long as there’s a basis in truth the audience will know you’re hamming it up! Alongside any best man speech jokes, be sure to add in some touching and emotional stories about the groom to provide some variety. You can also mention any major accomplishments that the groom has made in his life in this section if it’s relevant. Remember a bride will have her father’s speech to talk about how amazing she is, so as a best man it’s your duty to paint the groom in just as good a light.

The bride and the groom

Now that your best mate is married, it’s time to talk about the other love in his life – his new bride and how he met her. Talk about how they met and how you, as his best friend, knew that he was smitten and in love. This is another chance to make fun of him for being soppy or behaving in an out-of-character way. This is also part of the speech where you can be a bit more serious and you can talk about how amazing the bride is and how happy she makes your best friend.

You can even thank the bride, if you feel it is appropriate, for making the groom so happy. If you’re in a place to do so (or perhaps it’s funnier if you’re not) now is also a time to offer some advice to the bride and groom for the years to come. Keep it light-hearted and funny. No one wants to be told how hard marriage is on their big day.

The wedding day

Once you’ve exhausted all your jokes and anecdotes about the groom, it’s time to pay a few compliments. You can start with the wedding day itself, talking about how fabulous it has been so far and the amount of effort that has gone into the day. You can thank the parents of both the bride and the groom if you like here, but don’t go into a long list of thank-yous, as that is the groom’s job in his speech.

The best man speech toast

You’ll be glad to hear this is the final element of the best man speech and you can really afford to relax and be jubilant at this point in the speech as all your nerves should be gone and you’ll be well and truly at ease with public speaking by now. Much like the conclusion to an essay, you can use this part to quickly summarise the key points from your speech, or you can even complete a classic best man’s speech joke that you’ve cleverly woven in through the majority of the speech. Feel free to pepper this section with a few well-chosen last jokes to leave your guests feeling happy and upbeat too.

Your speech should end with a heartfelt toast to the newlyweds. Start with a few hopes and well wishes for the couple and then invite the wedding guests to stand and join you in raising a toast to the happy couple.

What To Do Once You've Written Your Best Man Speech

Now you’ve followed this best man speech template and have the bones of your speech written down, you’ll probably feel a real weight off your shoulders. From here, you can take your time fleshing out the details of the speech and adding or amending jokes where you see fit.

Now you need to time yourself reading the speech and cut or add to it depending on the time it comes out at. It’s also a really smart idea to ask someone to listen to your speech and give you honest feedback. Don’t choose anyone too close to the bride or groom as they will want to hear it for the first time on the wedding day. Another groomsman or someone going on the stag do would work well.

Hollie Bond

Hollie is a lifestyle journalist with over ten years’ experience working in the wedding industry as Lifestyle Editor for You & Your Wedding magazine Also a Regional Editor for Muddy Stilettos, Hollie has written for Square Meal magazine, Family History Monthly, BBC History magazine and Homes & Antiques. In her spare time you can find Hollie in a dance studio practising ballet…

Learn more about Hollie Bond

How To Write A Best Man Speech

Speechwriting can be daunting, especially when it comes to the best man speech, i.e. often one of the most talked about moments of the day. Whether you’re the best man in question, or getting married and looking for something to give your best man a nudge in the right direction, our list of simple top tips will make sure your speech goes off without a hitch. For more inspiration, check out our wedding readings podcast episode, and article on funny wedding readings . If you’re giving a speech in an alternative wedding role , a lot of this advice will still apply, so stick with us!

WHAT IS A BEST MAN SPEECH?

Traditionally, the running order of speeches goes: father of the bride, groom, best man. However, as the Rock My Wedding saying goes: it’s your day, your way! You can throw this malecentric lineup out the window and have whoever you like speak at the reception. Rules were made to be broken, baby. We absolutely love a bride’s speech , and the rise in popularity of the best woman .

Ultimately, the best man speech serves to bring everyone together, tell the newlyweds’ epic love story and raise a final toast to their future. We recommend keeping it between 3-5 minutes long, but if public speaking isn’t your forte, there’s nothing wrong with making it short and sweet. So, without further ado, here are our top tips for writing a best man speech that everyone will love.

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INTRODUCE YOURSELF

First thing’s first: a massive thanks to the previous speaker and another round of applause, giving a wedding speech is no easy job! Before you begin your epic best man speech, you could also share any messages for the happy couple from those who couldn’t be there on the day.

When it comes to introducing yourself, people will always want to know how you came to be best mates with the groom. The goal is not just to give a cracking speech, but for the guests to connect with you too. First impressions are everything, so we’d advise pacing yourself on the bubbly ahead of your speech to avoid any mishaps. You’ve got the rest of the day to enjoy a few drinks, so don’t let your hard speechwriting work go to waste by getting wasted yourself.

KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE

Now everyone knows who you are, but do you know your audience? One of the most important aspects of a best man speech is for it to be enjoyable for everyone, so keep the content appropriate for all audiences. This isn’t to say you can’t be a bit cheeky of course, but be mindful that grandparents, young children or colleagues could be there. There’s nothing more cringeworthy than an inappropriate story about the groom being met with a few nervous titters (save it for the afterparty). If you’re second-guessing yourself on any anecdotes, it’s likely best to leave them out. Topics that are generally a no-go zone include money, sex, politics, religion or past relationships.

MAKE SURE YOUR JOKES ARE FUNNY

Keep things upbeat; it’s a toast, not a roast. This is the happiest day of their lives and one joke too far could really ruin the mood. Being best mates, of course a few friendly digs are to be expected, but check in with the couple before the wedding so you know exactly where the line is.

There’s nothing less engaging for an audience than listening to too many in-jokes that they can’t understand. Avoid any ‘you had to be there’ moments - your job is to tell a story that makes the guests feel like they were there anyway!

TELL THEIR STORY

The key to a great speech? It’s got to flow. Rather than string together a few choice anecdotes, your best man speech should tell a story - their love story. Find a theme, identify your key messages and build your speech from there. Include some variety, a few tales to make ‘em laugh and cry. Sadly, you can’t fit everything you want to say into a few minutes, so make it count.

Additionally, this speech isn’t solely about your relationship with the groom - as close as you may be - it’s about their epic love story. Give everyone an insight into their lives and who they are as a couple. Don’t be afraid to get emotional! Whilst searching the internet for best man speech inspiration is a great place to start, make sure yours is ultimately authentic and personal. Think about your relationship with the both of them, any memorable moments or tales from when they first met. If you have a sweet story that their other half may not know, like how nervous the groom was on their first date, that’s perfect. You could even include a quote from their favourite film, poem or book.

BE PREPARED

Practise, practise, then practise some more. Look up examples and templates online, or search YouTube for epic best man speeches. Reading your speech aloud and in front of others will help you figure out what works in terms of timing, anecdotes, and your delivery. Ask for feedback and keep going until it’s perfect.

Top tip: having your speech printed or written down on paper automatically makes you look a lot more prepared than reading it from your phone. Plus, it’s a nice memento for the couple to keep if they wish.

TAKE YOUR TIME

Public speaking certainly isn’t for everyone, it’s totally normal to be nervous. The best advice we can give for beating those pre-speech butterflies is to pace yourself; take time to pause, breathe, and leave room for audience reactions. You don’t need to tell every funny story or joke one after another, either. Find the right balance between emotional anecdotes and witty banter. If your comedic timing is just right, those snappy one liners will land even better after a touching story.

Your hours of practise should help you keep your cool. However if, on the day, you’re flagging and a joke just isn’t landing right, don’t be afraid to go for an easy positive reaction. Ask everyone to give the happy couple another round of applause or a big cheer for someone who has helped put the ceremony/reception together. Just take a breath, and get back on track.

If you want to make sure guests are completely hooked, practise strong eye contact, upright posture and voice projection. If you’re closed off and mumbling, people will sense that you’re uncomfortable. Even if you’re not the most confident public speaker, a smile and some eye contact goes a long way!

RAISE A TOAST

Always finish by reiterating how much you love the newlyweds, how happy you are to be a part of their special day and ask everyone to raise a glass to their happiness. Then, get ready to hit the dance floor!

Now you've nailed your best man speech, it's time to organise a bit of fun. This 60 questions game is great for both stag-dos and on the day. Plus, this wedding at Steeton Hall has some great groomsmen & groom wedding photo inspiration.

Written by Georgia Gallant

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The ultimate best man speech guide

10 minutes you’ll remember forever.

The Best Man Speech is one of the highlights of any wedding, but getting it right is essential, because whilst it’s just 10 minutes or so on the day, the memories of this speech will  last a lifetime . Most Best Men are weighed down by the expectation to be funny, and have no idea where to start, what it should really contain, how to end it, or how to talk about the bride and groom in a meaningful and non-clichéd way. This page is the definitive guide on how to write your best man speech, from the structure, to the jokes, how to handle two men, props, format and quotes…it’s here. All you need is some time, a creative burst and the rest will take care of itself.

Quick Links

Opening lines.

• Being Best Man
• Relationship to Groom

Triumphs and Disasters

Closing lines.

• Joint Best Man

Best Man for Brother

• Girlfriends

How to write a great best man speech

Here is a short video with my thoughts and ideas on writing a great best man speech. I’ve expanded on those ideas below to give as much advice, hints and tips on writing a really great speech. Enjoy!

Many best men race to get that first funny line in there, and usually at the expense of quality. Keep it warm, funny and never edgy.

1. Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, for those who of you I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting yet, my name is Chris and I am officially Paul’s second best man…second best ladies and gentlemen…nobody likes to be second best do they? Well, Paul, looking at his career, he should know better than most…anyway where were we?

2. Good evening ladies and gentlemen before I begin I’d just like to introduce myself: my name is Chris and it is my very great honour and privilege to be the first of Mark’s two Best Man…we had to split it…46 years is quite a long time to cover all in one go! Over the course of the next few minutes I’ll be taking you through Mark’s sporting heroics, dealing with incredible loss and being caned by people dressed as nuns…which in fact had nothing to do with the stag do

3. Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen, over the next few minutes we’ll be talking about the man for whom Scottish Independence now means asking his English wife if he can go to the pub at the weekend. I can’t help but thinking that an English woman telling a Scottish man he can’t go to the pub, would be a new low in this country’s rich cultural history.

4. Over the next few minutes I’ll be taking you on the rollercoaster ride that has been Sean’s life to date, and there are some amazing stories; like the time he was playing A ball with David Cameron in Mexico and his dog ate the Prime Minister’s guinea pig and he had to sell my passport to repair his own nose…actually I’ve known Sean 30 years…I might have muddled a few things up there…

AN EXAMPLE OF WHAT NOT TO DO….

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, before I begin I would just like to take this opportunity to introduce myself to those of you I haven’t yet met. My name is Dave, and this Bob, and together it is our very great pleasure and privilege to be Colin’s best men for today’s celebrations.

At this point I thought I would be nervous at doing Leigh’s speech but I am now looking forward to ripping him a new arse hole in front of all his family and friends and better yet he has to sit there quietly.

This is the most puzzling part because unless you’re a seasoned speech writer, why should you have idea about structure? There are a few ways to tackle this, but the best idea is to keep things simple and form a logical progression from one piece to the next, don’t let the timeline jump around, don’t confuse the audience, and don’t cover topics or people multiple times.

Talk about being the best man

Now you’ve got to get from the introduction into the main part of the speech and this is the bridge, and in many ways the trickiest part of the whole speech, particularly if you’re trying to link everything together. Again, simple is good – don’t make the guests think too hard!

1.Over the next few minutes I will be guiding you though what amounts to one great big cry for help: Paul’s life. The inglorious acting career, the ridiculous hair, owning a ridiculous car, the persistent alcoholic over indulgence and drunken profane outbursts – he was quite simply South West London’s answer to David Hasselhof…just not as successful.

Neil is a special friend and special friends deserve one thing: three stag dos. The weekends of Istanbul, London and Leeds will live long in the memory of not just those who went, but also those who read about us in the national papers. The mass chants of ‘feed the snake! Feed the snake!’ and the enduring company of our new best friend Bianca the stripper are, I have to say, completely unrelated. I would also like to say that for the record Brian accepts and welcomes people from every country around the globe. Almost. AN EXAMPLE OF WHAT NOT TO DO….

Now a wise man once told me the best man speech should last as long as it takes for the groom to make love…So thank you everyone for coming

Firstly, I would just like to say how beautiful the bridesmaids look who have only been out shone by the bride herself, who looks amazing today.

If everyone could be upstanding, and raise a glass, know as some of you may know Kerry wanted to have the wedding a lot earlier than this, so that a certain something could be involved in the wedding, and unfortunately after a long and hard fight that couldn’t happen. I am of course talking about mikes rapidly thinning hairline, you will be sadly missed.

How you know the groom

This comes directly after the bridge and establishes a connection with the audience – they can immediately understand why you’re there, what you mean to the groom and it’s always an opportunity to have some fun with it, especially if you’re a brother!

• My first mistake was going to stay in the shared house in London where he lived. My second was to comment on the hair. As a glass bowl of pot pourri went sailing past my head and smashed behind me giving off a wonderful burst of sandalwood fragrance, I was given enough time to realize that this was a troubled, sensitive character who didn’t take criticism that well. Perfect friend material.
• I first properly met Nick way back in 1994 when we started secondary school together. Little did we know it at the time but it was the start of a beautiful relationship, which, for me, EVENTUALLY proved worth pursuing years later when I was able to borrow all his notes and pass my A Levels. Of course, Nick didn’t need them because he might look quite cool now but he was in fact a complete square at school.  The day when he could read without putting his finger on the word and then count without using his hands, were both real breakthrough moments in his life, only to be capped a few weeks later when he passed his driving test.
• I first met Brent when we attended the University of Texas and pledged a fraternity together. It was here amongst the upside down beer bongs, ritual humiliation and complete lack of sleep that I knew I had met a friend for life. This may sound overly emotional and slightly premature but when you discover your new buddy is packing his dad’s credit card with no limits, who wouldn’t want him as a friend for life? Just for the record Mr. Schakett, I know at times you may have been concerned about the amount of money Brent spent on alcohol and food on that card. You shouldn’t have: the Shot Man Schakett never wasted any of your money on food.

The trick to writing a really entertaining speech is to make the whole thing a story, rather than dragging the audience through endless stories. Recounting anecdotes is really hard to do because they require a lot of detail and all the time you’re getting to the punchline without making them laugh can prove really counterproductive. Of course, this can all pay off if you have a killer punchline, but all too frequently they aren’t that ‘killer’ and require you to have been there.

Instead take out the good bits from the stories and condense them, even embellish slightly into one neat burst of comedy…

1. Now as he embarked on adult life Nick was to learn the hard way just what it is to be a man, and the number one rule is: if you are going to offer to buy the drinks in happy hour, it’s best not to drop the entire lot down yourself as you get back to the table thus meaning you have to go and buy it all again just after happy hour’s finished. Also you should only ever do a runner from a restaurant via the roof if you HAVEN’T actually paid the bill. Leaving Prezzo’s this way one evening after settling up and leaving a good tip, still doesn’t make any sense to anyone.

2. Anyway when Mark wasn’t failing to hit the top spot in the classroom he was also finding it difficult to do that on the sports field as well. However, with a modest talent and even less interest, he did the only sensible thing to do: saved up all his skill and enthusiasm for one split second of genius. Quite how he managed to catch the impossible cricket ball as it left our sports master’s bat, is still completely unknown. But with, uncharacteristic razor sharp reactions and gazelle like agility, he did just that, and won his side the match. Literally seconds after this Mark retired from all forms of competitive sport – at the very top of his game.

3. There weren’t many highlights to being on minimum wage in the frozen section of nobody’s favourite supermarket, in fact if I remember rightly, there was only one. Nick had been asked to use his initiative to dispose of a 2 litre tub of chocolate ice cream – no big deal you might think. Well, Nick decides to take it into the staff toilets and empty it into the loo. Ladies and gentlemen, a big tub of melting chocolate ice cream can make a big impression when poured into a toilet and can only ever give the next person in there the wrong idea. And it did. From then on half the people thought he had dodgy guts the rest thought he ate on the toilet. Both of which, are in fact, true.

These are ripe areas for comedy material, and whilst you can hint at his accomplishments that should really come later in the speech, when it all gets a bit more meaningful. Of course, the disasters aren’t real disasters just areas of his life and social situations he’s got catastrophically wrong…for comedy effect.

It wasn’t all academic and sporting mediocrity though, there have been lots of other things he wasn’t good at too. Forget school discos and trying to speak to girls, Mark had computers eating out of his hand. And it’s easy to see why: with computers you can eventually work out what’s bothering them, they usually only ever break down for legitimate reasons and if you get fed up with them, you can just switch them off. You see, nothing made his heart beat harder or his mind race faster than a computer with a problem. It is a love affair that has endured to this day.

The impact the bride has had on the groom

This should be a fun look at the way the groom as upped his game, changed his wardrobe and started showing an interest in things outside of pubs, football and waking up late.

1. But when he’s not trying to track the dark forces behind his least favourite football club in the world, he also likes to go on holiday. Now going on holiday for Frank is nothing new but the way he goes about it now is very different from the Frank of old. Thanks to his beautiful new wife Emily, Frank now does something called globe trotting which actually involves going to lots of different far flung countries and immersing yourself in their culture, rather than a two hour flight and immersing yourself at the bar.

2. It’s always tricky that first stage of the relationship as you go about discovering whether it’s going to work or not. However, for Sean and Lucinda it was a lot trickier, as soon after he met her and became smitten, he had the romantic task of making her redundant. Sean was taking the old addage “if you love them set them free” to ridiculous conclusions, which resulted in Lucinda losing her job.

3. Cassie, can I just say that you look absolutely beautiful today, I think we can all agree Brent is one lucky guy. I always had a sneaking feeling that Brent was batting way above his average, now I know he is! I have seen over the years just how happy you both are together and I am so thrilled for Brent that he’s met such an amazing woman to share his life with. Also if you could find it in your big, warm heart to allow The Shot Man and that credit card to come out to play, then you would make some grown up, financially independent men, very happy too.

The wedding day really is only about one person, and even though the Best Man Speech should mainly be about the groom, the bride does of course have her part in it as well.

The thing to remember here is, that unless you live in Australia, the best man always goes last, and so the groom will already have extensively talked about how they met. You’re really looking to avoid repetition, so allude generally to how they met, and I’d avoid details…and if they met online and aren’t advertising the fact, then you shouldn’t either.

1. Seriously when Mark met you Emily, everyone could see just how happy that made him. He’s always been a great bloke waiting for the right girl and everyone who knows you both will tell you just what a great couple you are together. Mark I couldn’t be happier for you today, we’ve known each other such a long time and I hope that friendship lasts for many more years to come.

2. Ali, I know you make Neil incredibly happy – you must do, he’s stopped dressing like a middle aged freak. But seriously, you both make a great couple and I know that he’ll already have the next few years planned out on spreadsheets but if you can fit me in I’ll look forward to spending a lot happier times together.

3. The fact that Dave also looked like Kevin Keegan’s love child, also didn’t help his dating days. That was until that fateful night, on the last train from London when he met the lovely Katie and smooth talked her after another mate of ours offered her a complimentary chicken nugget, and the rest is history. In a world, which looks down upon fast food, I think we all need to think again.

4. I can see how incredibly happy you have made my old friend over these last eight years and just how much you have helped to change his life for the better. He’s always been a great guy buy now he has wider horizons and a greater sense of adventure. And I know just how much of a support you’ve been to him through the tough times. I think you are a great couple and I look forward to many more happy times together in the future.

There should really be only one toast in a best man speech and that’s at the very end. Tradition states that best men should reply on behalf of the bridesmaids at the beginning of the speech in response to the bridesmaids toast by the groom – but it’s just confusing and not necessary. A simple but effective toast at the end and you’re done.

All that remains for me is to wish you all a long and happy life together, with all the luck in the world.

Ladies and gentlemen, the bride and groom.

This is where you tie all the strands together, and say what a great friend/brother the groom is, how much he’s been there for you through difficult times, laughed with you through the good times, and always had your back….and if he hasn’t…just lie!

1. John, you have been a good friend to me ever since we first met, and not just in the form of free shots and hosting parties. We’ve had great times going to the games, hanging out and making that journey from college to adult life. I know there will be less time for me in your life as I’ve now been replaced by a small dog called Ben, but you’re catholic, and now you’re married – I can’t see that dog getting a look in for months anyway. However, I will always look forward to the time we spend together especially when for old time’s sake the Shot Man is once again unleashed. Thanks for being trustworthy, loyal and understanding friends and I hope to spend many more times together for many more years to come…maybe also with that doctor wife you promised me Julie.

2. With your laidback, calm and sensitive approach to life Frank, you’re somebody that many people count themselves lucky to have in their lives. Not just because of your willingness and ability to help them out as a friend but because you’re fun and light hearted ways mean you’re always a great guy to be around.

3. I am so happy that you’ve found each other to share your lives with and all that remains for me to say is that I hope you have a great day today and enjoy a long and happy life together.

4. Sam, we’ve known each other for such a long time and been through such a lot together that it’s hard to know where to begin. All I can say is that I couldn’t have wished for a better bloke to share those years with and I hope that there’s going to be plenty more of them to come. Thanks for being a great friend, and thanks for letting me copy your homework.

Other things to consider

From a vast amount of experience you should avoid using props at all costs. It might seem like a great idea to have films, photos, a man in a gimp suit taking the heat off you in a pressurised situation, but it only ever serves to make the day a lot trickier and the speech less effective. As soon as you start holding up pictures or invite people to look at pictures you’ve left on the table they will immediately stop looking at you and start zoning out or talking amongst themselves.

If you give anyone the opportunity to divert their gaze you then have to work really hard to get it back again, and props will only ever make your speech longer and more tedious to endure. They also usually rely heavily on cables, Bluetooth connections, wifi etc etc…or at the very least everyone being able to see what you’re holding up…and they never can. Suddenly you’re getting heckles about not being able to see/hear/understand and it makes the speech the longest 10 minutes of your life.

A great idea if you’ve got funny photographs is to pin them up by the seating plan so that everyone will get to see them and then you can reference those in your speech.

Forget the awful quotes that you normally hear such as ‘it’s not somebody you can live with, it’s somebody you can’t live without, there are some great quotes out there if you look hard enough. Just one for each speech as you don’t want it to become some sort of English Literature GCSE essay.

The greatest gift of life is friendship, and I have received it. - Hubert Humphrey

There is nothing on this earth more to be prized than true friendship. - Thomas Aquinas.

Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one. - AA Milne.

Think where man’s glory most begins and ends, and say my glory was I had such friends. - WB Yeats.

Quotes can be a really powerful way to end a speech, and it’s worth going that extra mile to find something that very few have used before, so check out sites such as BrainyQuote and GoodReads for an endless supply of great quotes.

You are always going to get a heckler or two so it’s worth thinking in advance how to deal with them so they don’t upset your flow, and even better, give you an opportunity to get some extra laughs. The most simple method is just to pause, wait until they’re done and carry on, but if you can get a bit of mileage out of it, so much the better.

A good way of having some fun is simply to ask if they’re looking for assistance in going to the bathroom, this works particularly well if they happen to be on the slightly older side. If it’s a younger person you can assume some vocal surprise that their carers have let them out for the day, or suggest that whatever medication the system has got them on, they need to cut the dose. Anything along this sort of gentle fun vein, always works a treat…as long as they don’t really have a carer and aren’t on medication.

In my experience best man jokes are probably the least effective addition to any best man speech that wants to be classed as superior. By best man jokes, I am alluding to about 100 or so gags that were written over the years specifically to get a laugh from wedding guests. You can do so much better than these, because they’re old, tired an dpeople have heard them all before and the last thing you want to do is land one of these at the start of your speech to a luke warm ripple of polite laughter.

To identify exactly what I’m talking about I’ve listed some of the most prolific offenders.

It’s an emotional wedding, even the cake is in tiers.

It’s not the first time today I’ve got up form a warm seat with a piece of paper in my hand.

If there’s anybody here this afternoon who’s feeling nervous, apprehensive and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead, it’s probably because you have just got married to the groom.

Complete rubbish. You need to work out what it is that’s funny about the groom in an original and engaging way, people will love your creativity and laugh much more!

Burning deep within his sole was a dream, what he wanted more than anything, more than being a cowboy, professional tennis player or A ball star…was to be an office manager in the NHS. What can I say? He’s not dreaming any more ladies and gentlemen.

This is one of the most important factors and it actually depends on quite a few things, so we’ll start off with the very general scenario of 3 speakers at a wedding – Father of the bride, Groom and Best Man. If this is the case and it’s in the UK, then the best man speech should be a stand up to sit down time of no longer than 10 minutes. If this is in America, that will be about 5 minutes maximum. Americans like their speeches shorter and more efficient, and that’s no bad thing.

However, these timings will then change the more speakers that are added to the line up, because what the groom should be doing is making sure the section of speeches doesn’t run into hours of your life you’ll never get back. If there are 4 speakers, aim to be in and out in around 8 minutes, 5 speakers you’re looking at about 6 minutes, and so it goes on.

You have to bear in mind also that as you’ll be the last speaker, apart from Australia where you’re up second, and so the guests are at the limit of their concentration endurance, so if they’ve been sitting through 90 minutes of speeches, and it happens, make it REALLY funny, and REALLY short.

If you are two best men making a joint speech then you should be stood for about 12-13 minutes, and that remains the case the more best men are added to the line up. If you’re a co-best man and you’re making separate speeches, then your speech should be about 7 minutes. The timings in Australia are identical to the UK except that the best man goes after the father of the bride.

Joint best man

Being a joint best man is pretty common these days, and you really need to tackle what you’re going to go about things as early as possible, because trying to coordinate two guys to write and deliver a speech whilst they juggle their own lives can prove next to impossible.

The first thing you have to decide is if you’re going to make a joint speech or separate ones. The best method is to make a joint speech as it means you won’t double up on gags or content, and nobody has that last dreaded speech spot. A great joint best man speech should consist of about 4 chunks of content each and you bounce from one best man to other all the way through the speech.

However, for many reasons making a joint speech might prove impossible. Maybe there’s no time to coordinate it, maybe you don’t like the guy, or maybe there’s a fundamental clash of ideas. In that case make sure your speech is efficient, tight and punchy and comes in at around 7 minutes, and whatever you do, make sure you get on first.

Quite a lot of grooms make their brother the best man, and that does throw up a few problems – the main one being that although you’ve grown up in the same family/house etc. you don’t really know that much about him! When I’m writing speeches, this doesn’t really affect the creative process because I’m looking for a very funny comedic overview of who the groom is, not a granular introspection. If you’re facing this very common problem, then just take everything you know about his character, passion, dislikes, job and even hair colour and get the funnies out of that. It can be done but it really needs thinking about.

Of course, there is some fun to be had with the introduction and you need to allude to that fact how upset you were when your number priority spot was completely usurped by a noisy, ugly ginger baby called Dave. If you’re younger than talk about the time you realised the bigger toddler in the house who kept bashing you over the head every time your mum left the room, was in fact your older brother Steve.

Former Girlfriends

As tempting as it may seem to have a quick chronological run through of the groom’s former loves, this will only ever end in disaster. This comes back to my point that the wedding day is really only about the bride – if you do anything to upset her, then it’s pretty terminal. Mentioning former conquests in any way shape or form is something I completely avoid, you might think it’s all light hearted fun but no bride likes to think of their brand new husband being the love interest of someone else!

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How to Write the Perfect Best Man Speech

So you’ve been chosen to be your best mate’s best man. Congratulations! It’s time to go crazy planning the stag do, right? Well, yeah. But you have another, far more important thing to worry about as well: the best man speech.

Contrary to (unfortunate) popular opinion, a good best man speech comprises far more than a few cheap jokes you found online and an embarrassing story involving the groom and a stripper in Las Vegas. Actually, it shouldn’t comprise any of the aforementioned elements.

Although a really, truly funny best man speech can be a great addition to any wedding, it’s far more important that you tick the necessary boxes with your speech. Make a few jokes and rib the groom a bit, by all means. But you also need to ensure that you say some more heartfelt things about him, say plenty of flattering – but not lecherous – things about the bride, and remark on how wonderful the day has been.

Expert advice on how to write and deliver a best man speech you’ll be proud of

This is the last of your best man duties, and quite possibly the most significant one (besides not losing the rings, of course). Think of it this way: it’s going to be part of the wedding video that your best friend and his wife show their children one day. So, don’t screw this up.

Feeling the pressure now? Good! But, you’ve come to the right place. Luckily for you, we’ve consulted experts on making your best man speech absolutely perfect and have compiled their best tips.

Best Man Speech Structure

Introduce yourself.

This should go without saying, but we’re still going to say it. It can be easy when you’re nervous to speed right past telling everyone who you are. Not everyone will know that you’re the best man (unless you made an ass of yourself earlier in the day.)

Take this opportunity to begin your speech calmly and to introduce yourself formally as the best man. You can also quickly introduce the bride and groom and make a comment about how you know the groom.

Robert, from My Wedding Speeches , tells us, “I try to make the introduction personal by usually introducing the bride and groom and within the first five or six lines I then crack some sort of joke about them. The jokes must be personal, though.” Using a generic one-liner as a speech opener is a fantastic way to start off on the wrong foot.

You probably know the groom better than a lot of people in the room. Therefore, it is up to you to talk a bit about his personal history. Make some jokes at his expense, by all means, but your speech should not be about destroying the groom.

Adrian of All Speeches Great and Small points out, “This is by far the most common way best men come unstuck. They think that they’re not doing their job properly unless the groom has been thoroughly embarrassed and emotionally tortured.” Instead, make sure you’re laughing with him, not at him.

You can also elaborate a bit more here on how you met and became such close friends. Or, if you’re family, you can joke about how you ended up being forced into each other’s lives.

The most important thing here is to not waste too much energy trying to be funny, especially if it doesn’t come naturally. “I know best man speeches are meant to be funny, but try to be sincere as well as comical,” says Robert (My Wedding Speeches).

How he’s changed

At this point, you can start to bring your speech forward into covering present day.

“A great best man speech is simply a really good story,” says Adrian (All Speeches Great and Small).

You can discuss the groom’s career here or perhaps how life hasn’t gone how you’d always planned it. There is the option to be a bit sentimental here about how much he’s grown, especially if he’s been through one or two major life events, or you can continue to be light-hearted.

Again, though, the emphasis should be on honesty. Don’t make up events just so they fit into a joke you want to tell, because it won’t be funny. Often, the most comical anecdotes are the most painfully true ones.

His dating history

Now, before we go any further, we must warn you to exercise caution when it comes to this topic. Know your audience and how they, particularly the groom’s parents or the bride, will react.

If the groom has any particularly problematic exes, leave them out. Similarly, if there were any girls his parents didn’t know about, now is not the time to tell them! And absolutely do not reminisce about any of his exes whom you found attractive.

In fact, mentioning exes altogether should be considered the ultimate taboo topic for your speech, according to literally every speechwriter interviewed for this article. Robert says that “mentioning exes is especially important to stay away from if the groom has been divorced.”

Instead of naming anyone specific, tell some funny stories about when he was woefully unsuccessful at pulling in a nightclub. Or, about how girls would dump him the second they saw how untidily he kept his flat. End this with humour like, “So how he’s actually gotten someone to marry him, I will never know.”

The blushing bride

Your comments about the bride should be nothing but thoroughly complimentary and flattering, without being creepy. It’s great if you find her attractive, but this is not the right time to let her know. (There’s never a right time to let her know, actually, so just get that out of your head now.)

“Always tell her how lovely she is and talk about what sort of person she is rather than making it superficial,” says Robert. Stay away from remarking on her looks and it will go a long way to making her feel valued.

Talk about how she’s changed the groom – for the better, obviously. Don’t start whining about how you and the groom never get drunk together anymore because she doesn’t like it, no matter how true that might be. Reiterate the fact that she looks beautiful and that the groom is a lucky man and you’ve pretty much done your job in this area.

If you have a decent relationship with the bride, you should speak to her about the speech. Oliver of I Am The Best Man suggests that, “Not only will she have good material, she will also be able to fill you in on the important biographical information about their relationship that you might not know.”

At this point, you can bring in some funny stories about your relationship with the groom over the years; even about your relationship with the bride if you two have become close. This needn’t be sappy, however. If you have some genuinely funny stories to tell about what a mess the groom used to be, or an experience the three of you shared together, you can include them here.

Don’t go on forever, though, and make sure the underlying message is about their positive impact on each other’s lives.

When it comes to deciding which stories to share, take advice from Patricia of BestManSpeechWriter.com : “It is the funny anecdotes and personal stories that make a speech unique to the best man and the friendship he shares with the groom. The trick is figuring out which stories are appropriate to share and, most importantly, which should be left in the past.”

In other words, stay well away from anything that could be considered risqué or #NSFW. Don’t forget who will be in your audience. Plenty of friends of the newlyweds who are your age will be there, yes. But there will also be parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and little cousins present.

“Jokes about sex might be good between friends, but they don’t belong in a speech,” says Oliver. This is still a common pitfall of best man speeches, though, so be careful you don’t make this mistake.

Tradition dictates that, towards the end of his speech, the best man imparts some marital advice on the happy couple. However, take this with a pinch of salt.

If you’re already happily married then by all means say a few words about what you think makes marriage great. But if not, don’t suddenly pretend to be some sort of marriage guru as it will come off as disingenuous.

Similarly, don’t lean on a generic, sexist joke, inappropriate comment, or stock line like, “Just say ‘yes dear’ to everything”. “I would avoid giving ‘hilarious’ advice, if at all possible,” echoes Adrian (All Speeches Great and Small). So, either take the opportunity here to poke fun at yourself for not being married yet or just skip this bit altogether.

Hopefully the most straightforward part of your best man speech, the toast only needs to be a couple of lines. Toast the newlyweds, wish them love, health, and happiness, and down the rest of your bubbly.

Best Man Speech Tips & Tricks

Timing is everything.

This ought to go without saying, but long wedding speeches have never contributed to a good wedding. No matter how funny or heartfelt you’re planning for your speech to be, your audience’s attention is extremely finite. They’ve more than likely already hit the bar, and probably want to get back to drinking as soon as possible.

Exactly how long is too much is up for debate, and the pros we spoke to have slightly differing opinions. While Oliver advises around 10 minutes, Adrian and Robert advise 5-7 minutes, and Patricia says you can make do with as little as 3 minutes. Take from these opinions what you will, but definitely keep it to fewer than 10.

Writing an over-long best man speech is a common mistake, according to Oliver. “People get over excited when it comes to content. They underestimate or forget that they’re the last person of at least three and they try to crowbar in too much. If you go on for too long, you’re just going to lose people.”

Avoid joke websites

It doesn’t matter how funny you find the jokes when you’re reading them to yourself on the toilet, packing your best man speech with jokes you found online is a TERRIBLE idea.

Generic jokes never sound natural and will come off as obviously scripted. They also never illicit anything more than groans, especially from the newlyweds.

The groom picked you to be his best man because he loves and trusts you; don’t make him regret it.

Laughter is the best medicine

That being said, it’s perfectly natural to be a bit jittery prior to giving your best man speech. However, as all the experts we spoke to agreed, knowing you’ll be giving a funny speech can be the best reassurance.

“Telling jokes goes hand-in-hand with gaining confidence. You want to know you’ll be able to deliver a speech that’s funny and worthwhile,” says Oliver.

Of course, you may not be naturally funny, and that’s okay too!

Add at least a couple of quips to your speech in order to break the ice if nothing else. “We believe that every speech should contain humour,” says Patricia. “But the amount of humour we insert into the speeches we write is very much tailored to our client.” Lesson learned: be funny, but only as funny as you feel genuinely comfortable with.

Practice and edit

Knowing your best man speech through and through is hugely important. It’ll make your delivery smooth and last-minute stage fright is less likely to get the better of you. Write index cards to have on hand to remind you of your main points, but don’t rely on them completely.

Memorise your first line, at least one middle line, and your last line. This way, if you blank out or lose your place, you’ll have some idea of what comes next!

You shouldn’t be afraid to edit, either. Practice a few times in front of friends and, if a certain line (or 5) consistently falls flat, delete it. “A lot of people write a speech in isolation and won’t get any feedback on it and are then surprised that their jokes fall flat on the day. Getting feedback is really important and will help you to figure out what’s funny and what’s not funny,” advises Oliver (I Am The Best Man).

Remember to breathe

Breathing is one of the human body’s automatic functions and, in most situations, is impossible to forget to do. However, for whatever reason, when they’re faced with the task of public speaking, one can actually forget to breathe.

If you’re a nervous public speaker, it’s important to constantly remind yourself to take breathers during your speech. These will give you natural pauses and time to collect yourself, especially if you’ve stumbled over any words. And don’t worry, no one will notice! Those few seconds it takes to take a deep breath and a sip of water will feel completely normal to the other guests.

So, to all the best men out there, we hope this has given you the guidance and reassurance you need to write and deliver a best man speech you can be proud of. We have more speech advice for the groom and the father of the bride !

2 thoughts on “ How to Write the Perfect Best Man Speech ”

• Pingback: Wedding Speeches Advice - Who to Get to Do The Speeches | HD moments

Best part of the day when your a wedding photographer is the best man speech. They are so nervous throughout the day and then after they have done their speech its like a big relief and their personailty really comes out

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The Best Man Speech Guide

You are here because you have received the honour of being the best man – congra­tula­tions!

There are many jobs and respon­sibi­lities that come with being a best man. Planning the crazy, unforgettable stag do , helping the groom prepare for the wedding and of course writing that all important best man speech. But writing a speech is more than putting pen to paper; you want to make it captivating, funny and perfect for the newlyweds. We understand how this can become quite a challenge, so we’ve put together a guide on all things best man speech related, with speech structures, joke ideas, the dos and don’ts of a best man speech and everything in between.

Get our Best Man Speech Template for FREE here...

What Makes a Great Best Man Speech?

Whether you are the groom’s longest friend or writing the best man speech as a brother, there are certain paths that everyone goes down when it comes to putting their speech together. As soon as you find out you have the important role of best man, you instantly think about your speech. And writing a best man speech can be hard! The most important thing to remember is adding some humour, heartfelt words and a bit of banter.

9 Rules When Writing a Best Man Speech

1. Make sure it’s no more than 1,000 words – that equates to around 7 minutes

2. Add some humour, but don’t go over the top

3. Only use one reminiscence or anecdote

4. Mix humour and friendly digs towards the groom

5. Complement the bride

6. Do NOT swear

7. Try to memorise your opening line

8. Speak loudly and slowly

9. Make the last thing you say memorable

6 Types of Best Man Speeches

A great way to make sure that your best man speech ends up being legendary is by ensuring you've nailed the structure and overall theme of your monologue. So, if you are still stuck for ideas to start from, here are a few different types of best man speeches that you can take inspiration from:

1. Light-Hearted

• Grabs the audience’s attention
• Be fondly remembered for years to come

2. Edgy/Witty

• Full of the gags and one-liners
• Usually centre on topics that would usually be serious or a bit taboo

3. The Roast

• Make sure you and the groom are close enough
• Don’t expect to be on the good side of the groom after the speech

4. Poking Fun

• Good for sneaking some light laughs into your speech
• A good, gentle but fun option
• Acceptable to shove even more digs and jokes in
• Usually an advantage for everything

6. Sentimental

• Easy on the laughs and the fun
• Praises the bride and groom

Best Man Speech Opening Lines

Even the shortest best man speech needs a cracking opening line. This is the opportunity to get everybody’s attention, and the best way to do that is with some humour! The opening line will give an indication as to what type of best man speech route you are going down. It’s important to introduce yourself whether you want to make the introduction humorous, sincere or edgy the choice is yours. It’s also important to explain how you and the groom know each other.

Opening Lines to Begin Your Best Man Speech

1. "Hi guys, my name is (best man) and as best man, it’s my job to tell you the truth about (groom)."

2. "Most of you may wonder why out of everyone, I was chosen to be the best man today. To be honest, I am the only one of (groom)’s friends who can read and write!"

3. "I’d like to make a toast (brings out a piece of toast)"

4. "I was taught by my parents that if I had nothing good to say about someone don’t say anything at all (pause)"

5. "Ladies and gentlemen, I’d like to thank you all for coming today, especially everyone who knew I’d be doing a speech – it’s great that you decided to still come."

6. "My name is (best man). Today it is my job to praise the groom, but in fact, whilst writing this speech, I’ve found it impossible to praise him at all!"

How to Structure Writing a Best Man Speech in 10 Simple Points

Once you’ve got your opening line out of the way, you will be onto the rest of writing the best man speech. There are a variety of different thing you can include into your best man speech depending on the type of speech you’re going for. Most of the topics below are what everyone puts into their best man speech. Once you’ve got all these figured out you’re well on your way to writing a best man speech that will be memorable!

1. Introducing Yourself

Unless you’ve done this in the opening line, you will need to let the audience know who you are. You could do this introduction in a number of ways.

• Alternative

2. Relation to the Groom

Make known who you are and your relationship with the groom; it’s the perfect opportunity for banter, roasting and explaining why you love ‘em.

3. Friendship Reminisces

The Essential part of your speech should be best handled using heartfelt remarks alongside a dribble of humour.

Things to consider mentioning:

• How you met
• How long you’ve known each other
• Being great mates
• Your first impressions
• Reaction to when he proposed
• Your favourite/­­funniest memory

4. The Praise

Pay tribute to the star of the show (the groom); the obvious stuff to mention is:

• What a great friend he is, and why
• How honoured you are to be the best man
• How delighted you are for the groom
• Pledge your support to the groom
• Some meaningful words
• How the groom inspires you?
• Explain why the groom will be good husband material

5. The Roast

There are 4 key ingredients you need to serve up the perfect roast:

• Personality trait

6. Add a Joke

Make sure the next section of the best man speech is humorous, perhaps talk about:

• Honour of being the best man
• Preparing the speech
• Cost of the wedding
• The stag do
• Best man duties
• Anxious moments

7. Compliment the Bride

The bride is equally the biggest part of the day as the groom so she deserves at least a mention in the speech.

There are a few things that can be said to compliment the bride:

• Admiration for the bride
• Bride’s qualities
• Groom’s happiness
• Like to know her better
• Recognising bride’s efforts
• Bride’s bettered the groom
• Wish her luck

8. Compliment the Couple

Once you have praised and complimented them separately, it’s important that you compliment them as a couple.

9. Closing Lines

Things to include in a sentimental closing line:

• Your belief in their marriage
• Your own hopes in the marriage
• Sum up the day
• Your place in their lives now
• Your congratulations
• Your best wishes
• Wise words for the future
• Amusing presents
• Jokes about the honeymoon
• Wedding costs

10. ‘Thank You’ & Toasts

Talk about the following topics:

• The honour of being chosen to be the best man
• For being involved in the wedding personally
• To all the contributors to the wedding
• To the guests for attending and all the gifts they’ve brought along
• Toast to the couple’s future

Best Man Speech for Brothers

Apparently, 1 in 4 best men are also a brother of the groom. So it makes sense why a best man speech for brothers are so popular. There is a lot of pressure on the best man with writing a speech but since you are the brother, you’ve got a serious advantage. If you are the brother, there are a lot more grounds you can talk about and cover without treading on anyone’s toes. Talk about how you are best friends, your childhood memories etc.

You can even get the parents involved more when you’re writing a best man speech as a brother! After all that is the biggest thing you and your brother have in common so mentioning them in the speech might be a nice addition. Some healthy sibling rivalry is also a great way to add some humour into the best man speech. Poke fun at him and some of the healthy competition you had growing up.

As the brother, you can also add something a lot more heartfelt than any other best man could. As well as complimenting the bride and everything else around the couple, you are also welcoming the bride into the family as your new in law.

6 Rules for Writing a Best Man Speech for Brothers

1. Use the fact that your brothers to your advantage as it will make your speech unique

2. Don’t add too many inside jokes as it could leave people confused

3. Don’t swear

4. Keep it clean, remember your parents and grandparents will be listening

5. Speak slowly and pause for laughter

6. Don’t be afraid to use cue cards if you think you might forget some parts of the speech

Funny Best Man Speeches

As soon as you have been given the position of best man, it goes without saying that writing a funny best man speech runs through your brain. Of course during the best man speech, you want to add some emotion, compliments and heartfelt words. But the funny parts are the most important obviously. But of course when going for funny best man speeches you want to make sure you don’t overdo it.

4 Rules for Funny Best Man Speeches

1. Remember where you are, you don’t want your jokes going down a controversial route or to offend anyone

2. Steer away from jokes that only a select few people will get, you want to engage your whole audience

3. Make sure you don’t have to over explain any jokes as that’s when the joke isn’t funny, keep everything short and sweet.

4. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself, your audience aren’t expecting a comedy show off Jack Whitehall!

Short Best Man Speeches

Whether you are the groom’s longest friend or your writing the best man speech as a brother there are certain paths that everyone goes down when it comes to putting their speech together. As soon as you find out you have the important role of best man you instantly think about your speech. And writing a best man speech can be hard! The most important things to remember is to add some humour, heartfelt words and a bit of banter.

1. Introduce yourself to the audience

2. Tell some jokes relating to the groom

3. Congratulate the happy couple

Best Man Speech Examples

By this point, you should have a good idea of how you want to structure your best man speech. However, the next part is probably the hardest - getting some original words of your own written down! Here’s a few best man speech examples you can take inspiration from to get you started:

1. The “Thankful” Speech

“It’s a pleasure to be here as [groom’s] best man tonight. I’d like to start off by thanking you for the opportunity to stand by you and [bride] today and share this special moment with you. [Groom] has always been someone I look up to and respect, and it makes me happy to see that he’s found someone to share the rest of his life with. Cheers to a lifetime of memories and happiness”

2. The “Good Idea” Speech

“I’ve known [Groom] for many years, and we’ve shared a lot of laughs and good memories together. However, it’s said that with old friends, you can afford to be stupid with them! Yet despite how many funny stories we have, I have to praise [Groom] for all the smart decisions he’s made in his life – His friends, career, and you, [Bride], quite possibly the best decision he’s ever made!”

3. The “She’s the One” Speech

“When I was first introduced to [Bride], I knew instantly that she was perfect for [Groom]. Even if he wasn’t aware of the fact that they’d end up here today, it was clear to his friends that he was captivated by her. Even when [Bride] wasn’t there, [Groom] would still manage to talk about her every five minutes! And now, today, we see how far they’ve both come and how perfect they really are for each other.”

Best Man Toast Ideas

Regardless of the occasion, no great speech is complete without a great toast! Have a look at a few best man toast examples here to help you out with rounding off that awesome monologue you’ve just written!

1. “I’d like you all to join me in wishing the new Mr and Mr/Mrs [surname] all the wealth, health and happiness in the world. To the happy couple!”

2. “To [NAME] and [NAME] – here is to a lifetime of love and happiness”

3. “Raise your glass and join me in a toast to [Bride] and [Groom] – may you always be friends as well as lovers”

4. “To my best friend and his beautiful bride: the new Mr and Mrs/Mr [surname]”

5. “Here is a toast to a perfect couple – to a long life together filled with happiness, adventure and lots of wonderful memories”

Best Man Speech FAQs

Of course, you might still have some burning questions we haven’t covered yet. But don’t worry, we’ve listed a few best man speech FAQs for you here so you don’t get caught out!

When Does the Best Man Speech Happen?

The best man speech usually takes place during the wedding reception after the maid of honour has said a few words to the newlyweds. However, some couples may choose to schedule this for during the reception meal. Make sure to stay up to date with the order of the day and check in with the groom regularly if anything changes.

How Many Speeches is the Best Man expected to give?

Just one! Once you know when the timeslot for your speech is, be sure to put plenty of time into memorising it as best as you can. Best man speeches that have had lots of time and effort put into them will be reflected during the delivery.

What is the Purpose of a Best Man Speech?

The idea behind giving a best man speech is to give the audience an insight into the newlyweds and their relationship through your unique perspective and standpoint as his friend or relative. But remember, the speech should mainly be about the relationship between the couple, rather than you and the groom.

4 Best Man Speech Websites

1. the best man speech |  website.

Claiming to have the largest collection of best man speech material on the web, this website definitely doesn’t disappoint! The Best Man Speech takes you through the basic elements that every speech needs, shows you the latest trends and gives you tips on how you can personalise your speech to impress the groom and make the bride cringe. The site even offers a navigation system that starts with the opening line, so it’s practically writing the whole thing for you.

2. I am the Best Man |  Website  

A popular one, I Am the Best Man is really a one stop shop of all the things you need for your speech and more. Here, you’ll find a best man speech checklist so you can make sure you’ve got everything covered, great one liners you can personalise and even a quick guide to conquering your nerves. If you’re feeling extra lazy, the professionals over at I am the Best Man will even write your speech for you?!

3. Simply the Best Man |  Website

Simply the Best Man is really what it says on the tin – it’s a website that will truly turn you into the best…best man out there. This site breaks down your best man speech into 7 phases so you can focus on each and end up with an epic speech that the groom will be talking about for weeks. To top it off, the site offers free downloadable guides so you can print them out, edit them or whatever you fancy.

4. All Speeches Great & Small |  Website

If you can’t trust a specialist in every type of speech under the sun, who can you trust we say! All Speeches Great & Small are the connoisseurs of creating the perfect speech for any occasion. They have a whole section for best man speeches, with a bunch of different tips that home in on the sections of a speech. They also discuss the length of your speech, how to tackle awkwardness and who you need to address when you’re making it.

Download the Best Man Speech Guide

If you are liking our Best Man Speech template and wish to print it off, feel free to download it by pressing the link below!

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• 14 Unforgettable Best Man Speech Examples To Inspire You
• Wedding Speeches
• 7 June 2023

14 Amazing Best Man Speech Examples

Many wedding venues will have microphones and speakers. If it is a large space then these will be necessary. But make sure you are comfortable with a microphone and if possible have a practice beforehand. There is nothing worse than delivering your killer punchline just as you turn your head away from the mic and nobody hears it! In the following best man speech examples you must talk clearly into the microphone.

If there is no microphone or you prefer not to use one, make sure you talk loud enough so those at the back of the room can hear.

1. Best Man Speech Examples: The Humorous Opener

“Ladies and gentlemen, if you’re wondering why I’m here, it’s because the groom needed at least one person to make him look good. And since his parents couldn’t make it, I’m here instead!”

If In Doubt, Buy The Book…

The best best man speech examples have a humorous and self-deprecating opener that instantly grabs the audience’s attention and sets a light-hearted tone for the rest of the speech.

2. The Childhood Anecdote

“I remember when [Groom’s Name] and I were kids, we used to play superheroes together. He always insisted on being the hero, and I was his trusty sidekick. Little did I know that years later, he would find his real-life superhero in [Bride’s Name].”

3. The Love Story Narration

“Once upon a time, in a land not so far away, a charming prince named [Groom’s Name] met his beautiful princess, [Bride’s Name]. Their love story began with stolen glances, blossomed through countless dates, and today, culminates in this magical wedding celebration.”

These best man speech examples take the audience on a journey, narrating the couple’s love story from the beginning and building up to the present day. It adds a touch of enchantment to the speech.

4. The Supportive Brother

“As [Groom’s Name]’s older brother, I’ve had the privilege of witnessing his growth and evolution. From scraped knees and muddy soccer fields to this momentous occasion, I couldn’t be prouder of the man he has become. [Bride’s Name], thank you for bringing out the best in my brother and making him the happiest man on earth.”

This example showcases the brotherly bond and expresses heartfelt gratitude to the bride for positively influencing the groom’s life.

5. The Unexpected Talent

“As it turns out, [Groom’s Name] isn’t just a master of wit and charm; he’s also a secret dance maestro. Who knew those moves on the dance floor were carefully choreographed by him? [Bride’s Name], get ready for a lifetime of dancing to his unique rhythm!”

This example adds an element of surprise by highlighting a hidden talent of the groom. It injects humour into the speech and celebrates the couple’s future together.

6. The Toast to Family

“Let’s raise our glasses and toast to the families that brought [Groom’s Name] and [Bride’s Name] together. May their love and support continue to strengthen this bond, and may the union of these two families bring nothing but joy and harmony.”

This example emphasises the importance of family, inviting everyone to join in a toast that celebrates the union of not only the couple but also their families.

7. The Lessons in Love

“In all the years I’ve known [Groom’s Name], he’s taught me many things. But the most important lesson he has taught me is that love is worth fighting for. [Bride’s Name], you’ve proven that true love exists, and together, you are an inspiration to all of us.”

This example acknowledges the valuable lessons the groom has taught the speaker and expresses admiration for the couple’s love, positioning them as a source of inspiration.

8. The Quirky Comparison

“If [Groom’s Name] was a movie, he would be a romantic comedy – full of laughter, unexpected twists, and a heart-warming ending. And today, he has found his leading lady in [Bride’s Name], turning his real-life rom-com into a happily ever after.”

This example uses a fun and relatable comparison to describe the groom’s personality and likens his journey with the bride to a romantic comedy film.

9. The Thank You to the Guests

“On behalf of the newlyweds, I want to express our gratitude to all of you for being here to celebrate this joyous occasion. Your presence today fills our hearts with happiness and makes this day even more special.”

This example takes a moment to acknowledge and thank the guests for their presence, emphasising the significance of their support and participation in the couple’s big day.

10. The Promise of Friendship

“As the best man, it is my duty to ensure that [Groom’s Name] never faces a challenge alone. I promise to be there through thick and thin, just as he has been there for me. Together, we will navigate the waters of marriage and continue to create lifelong memories.”

This example emphasises the best man’s commitment to friendship and offers a heartfelt promise of ongoing support and companionship.

11. The Romantic Quote

“In the words of the great poet, Robert Browning, ‘Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be.’ [Groom’s Name] and [Bride’s Name], may your journey together be filled with endless love, cherished moments, and a future that surpasses all expectations.”

This example incorporates a romantic quote to convey well wishes for the couple’s future, evoking a sense of timelessness and eternal love.

12. Best Man Speech Examples: The Wedding Advice

“As someone who has already embarked on this wonderful journey called marriage, I offer you this advice: always communicate openly, support each other’s dreams, and never forget to keep the spark alive. Cheers to a lifetime of happiness, love, and unforgettable adventures!”

This example adds a personal touch by offering marriage advice based on the speaker’s own experience, fostering a sense of camaraderie and shared wisdom.

13. The Appreciation for the Bride

“I want to take a moment to acknowledge the incredible woman who stole [Groom’s Name]’s heart. [Bride’s Name], your love for him is evident in every glance, every touch, and every smile. Thank you for bringing so much joy and love into his life.”

Best man speech examples that express appreciation and admiration for the bride always go down well, recognising her impact on the groom’s life and highlighting the depth of their love.

14. The Final Toast

“To [Groom’s Name] and [Bride’s Name], may your marriage be filled with endless laughter, unwavering support, and a love that grows stronger with each passing day. Cheers to a lifetime of shared adventures and unforgettable memories!”

This example concludes the speech with a final toast, encapsulating heartfelt well wishes for the couple’s future and leaving a lasting impression on the audience.

These 14 amazing best man speech examples provide a range of ideas and styles to inspire your own speech. Remember, the key is to add your personal touch, tailor the content to the couple, and deliver it with sincerity and confidence. With these examples as your guide, you’re sure to create a speech that will leave a lasting impression on the newlyweds and their guests. Good luck!

See Also…

10 Tips for an Unforgettable Father of the Bride Speech

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Rock Your Best Man Speech Using Our Expert-Approved Advice

• Chapelle writes articles for The Knot Worldwide. She covers all things wedding-related and has a personal interest in covering celebrity engagements and fashion.
• Before joining The Knot Worldwide, Chapelle was an editorial intern for Subvrt Magazine.
• Chapelle has a degree in English writing from Loyola University New Orleans.

Pat yourself on the back—you're the best man. It's a good feeling when one of your loved ones asks you to be their right hand for the wedding. Beyond the fun best man duties , like planning an epic bach party , you'll have to give a rousing best man speech. We believe it's arguably the most meaningful duty, but don't let that get you nervous. Whether you're a public speaking pro or have only delivered speeches while on the eighth-grade debate team, boost your chances of making your best man speech a hit by using our helpful tips, ideas and examples for inspiration.

In this article:

Printable Template | How to Write | Examples | Tips | FAQs

Printable Best Man Speech Template

Delivering a best man wedding speech doesn't have to feel like a chore. Use the template below as a checklist while you're writing your best man speech.

How to Write a Best Man Speech Outline

We're guessing the thought of crafting a flawless best man speech from scratch feels pretty overwhelming right about now. Start by drafting a bare-bones outline (trust us, drawing up a rough outline is way more palatable than writing a fully fleshed-out speech). You don't need to include every element in your wedding speech . Instead, customize it to fit the couple, the event and your relationship with the groom.

1. Have a killer opening line.

Successful best man speeches always start with a good opener. Introduce yourself and explain your connection to the happy couple. Have fun with this part by sharing a quick joke or quoting a poem so your speech doesn't start off stale. For example, "Hello everyone! For those of you who don't know me, thank you so much for coming to my wedding. [pause for laughter] Sorry about that...I'm a little nervous."

2. Thank the other speakers.

Once you address the audience, give props to the previous speaker to help lead into your speech. If you know your speech has a sillier sentiment, now's your chance to warn your audience in the change of direction. Here's an example: "Let's give it up to the amazing speech given by the wonderful maid of honor . If you enjoyed how thoughtful and sweet her speech was, you better get the tissues ready for this one!"

Next, express your gratitude to the couple's parents. Thank the couples' parents for not only raising incredible adults and, if they helped pay for the wedding, for hosting such a great party. Here's an example: "I'd like to begin by expressing my deepest gratitude to the couples' parents for raising such amazing people, who I'm fortunate to call my best friends. I would also like to thank their parents for hosting such an awesome celebration for all of us to enjoy this evening."

3. Say a few words about your friend's new spouse.

Another writing a best man speech tip is always to give a special shoutout to the new spouse so they feel welcomed and included. Yes, we know you most likely have a closer relationship with the groom, but don't let that stop you from showering them with kind words––it's their big day too. Talk about the qualities you like about them and why you love them in the groom's life. Try this, "I'm so happy [Spouse's Name] fell in love with [Groom's Name]. Firsthand I've seen the grace, intelligence and confidence [Spouse's Name] has, which explains why [Groom's Name] knew he wanted to marry [Spouse's Name] after their first date."

4. Share personal stories.

What's going to make your best man speech stand out are personal stories. We suggest adding one or two anecdotes, like your favorite memories with the groom (and their partner, if you want). Avoid choosing a story that rambles on and has no sentimental or funny ending—keep it lighthearted and short. Here's a silly example, "I remember when we first met in first grade. [Groom's Name] had just glued his hand to his face but still used his free one to shake my hand and ask if I wanted to be his friend."

5. Talk about the couple's relationship.

This is the time to speak about why the groom and their new spouse are a great couple. Share how they first met and how their relationship has grown so other guests can get a better insight into the newlyweds. If you helped the love birds meet, say something like this in your best man speech: "I know I said earlier I'm the best man, but I lied. I'm actually Cupid because I'm the one who introduced these two eight years ago."

6. Propose a toast.

Finally, close out your best man speech with a heartfelt toast. Ask everyone to raise a glass and provide well wishes to the newly married couple. Steal this wedding toast : "Everyone, please join me in raising a glass to such a wonderful couple. I wish you a lifetime of peace, love and happiness. Love you guys!"

Find your kind of venue

Best man speech examples.

Now that you know how to write the outline, let us provide you with some inspiration. Here are four best man speech ideas for every type of delivery.

Short Best Man Speech Example

Short best man speeches can make the grade just as much as long ones. Try this short but sweet example.

As the poet, Dante once said, 'A great flame follows a little spark.' When [Groom's Name] met [Spouse's Name], there was a little spark. I know because I talked to him the next day.

From the way he talked about [Spouse's Name], this stranger he chatted up at a Halloween party, I could tell this spark was something special.

You two are fantastic together. May the flame burn long, and may sparks continue to fly. Cheers to the newlyweds!

Funny Best Man Speech Example

Funny best man speeches are our favorite. You get to show off your comedic skills while giving loving well-wishes to the happy couple.

Hello! For those who don't know me, I'm [Your Name], the best man. I've known [Groom's Name] since middle school, which means that it was before we learned mullets weren't a good look for either of us.

[Groom's Name] and [Spouse's Name] told me there are some topics I should avoid in this speech so…[Look through cue cards, then shake head and dramatically drop them all to the floor but one.]

[Reading from the remaining cue card] [Groom's Name] is really the best friend I've ever had. He's done so many wonderful things it would be difficult to name them all. Hey, [a Groomsman's Name], I can't read your handwriting here!

But seriously, it's all true. This guy is a great friend, the best I've got, and I'm very proud to stand by his side today.

[Spouse's Name], I was hoping to be the best-looking person in the room today but obviously, I failed miserably. You look beautiful and radiant. I'm beyond happy for the two of you.

May you always find joy in the little things, like your Xbox and 'Star Wars.' Oh wait, that's my personal goal. You should actually find joy in each other, and do everything you can to have a lifetime of happiness together. Let's toast the newlyweds!

Best Man Speech for Brother Example

Need best man speech examples for your brother? Use our speech below as a guide to delivering a sweet message to your older or younger brother.

On my fourth birthday, my parents got me a brother…I wanted a puppy.

But seriously, as a kid [Groom's Name] wanted to do everything I did. He used to follow me around. He used to sneak into my room and play with my Matchbox cars. Our parents could get him to eat his broccoli by making me eat my broccoli.

It wasn't until after I went to college that he started going down his own path. He started doing volunteer work. He found a job he loves, a pretty killer apartment and, of course, he found [Spouse's Name].

[Spouse's Name], you're the nicest person I've ever met, and my brother is so blessed to have someone like you in his life. Thank you for being there for him.

I'm so happy you two found each other especially because I'm gaining a sister today. Oh, and I want to set the record straight. I'm glad I didn't get a puppy that day. I love you, little bro.

Congratulations to both of you. I wish you lots of laughter, love and joy as a married couple. Cheers to the newlyweds!

Best Man Speech for Best Friend Example

For those who need a best man speech sample for their best friend, we got you covered. Here's how to tell your BFF you're happy for them on their special day.

Good evening, everyone! I'm [Your Name], and I'm extremely honored to call myself [Groom's Name]'s best man. Also, please excuse the puffiness under my eyes, I've been happy crying since before the ceremony.

I first met [Groom's Name] while working at a pizza joint called Domenica's while in college. I hated being a server with all my heart, but whenever [Groom's Name] and I were scheduled together, it made it so much more bearable.

We laughed until we cried, ate hundreds of garlic knots and I can't tell you the amount of times we accidentally got pizza dough stuck to the ceiling during our pizza toss competitions. But even after we both quit and moved on to bigger and better things, we still kept in touch and I'm eternally grateful.

One of those bigger and better things was [Spouse's Name]. [Groom's Name] really discovered the perfect piece to his puzzle. [Spouse's Name] laughs at his bad jokes, listens to his long monologues about Batman vs. Superman and most importantly, loves him no matter what. [Spouse's Name] is a phenomenal and caring person who deserves the world, and I know [Groom's Name] will do everything he can to give it to them.

Thank you both for allowing me to be a part of your beautiful wedding, and I can't wait to see what else is in store for you in the future. Love you guys, and cheers to the handsome couple!

Best Man Speech Tips

Good news! We got how to give a best man speech tips from Dominic Bliss, wedding writer and author of Being the Best Man for Dummies. Study up on these helpful pointers below to minimize pre-speech jitters and ensure a smooth delivery.

Plan ahead.

The first tip in our guide on how to write a best man speech is to get started in advance. (As in, do not procrastinate.) "Start writing a best man speech at least two months before the wedding," Bliss says. "As the wedding nears, there are lots of events—suit fittings and a coed shower, perhaps—that could distract you from getting your writing done." Brainstorm and write down any stories, jokes or best man speech quotes you want to include. The more time you have to prepare your best man speech, the better. This way, you'll be able to be fully present at upcoming wedding festivities.

Be genuine.

Whether the wedding guests are strangers or family, it can feel nerve-racking to deliver your best man speech with all eyes on you. To ease the awkwardness, provide anecdotes and stories about your relationship with the couple. Everyone loves a bit of nostalgia, and the guests get to know you better.

With that said, stay true to how you normally act while making your speech. There's no need for you to change who you are for some made-up public speaking persona. If you feel more comfortable cracking jokes throughout your speech, do it. If you are better at being sentimental and don't mind leaving everyone misty-eyed, take that approach. Remember, the couple chose you to speak at their wedding because they felt you could add something special to their big day. As long as you deliver a heartfelt speech, the newlyweds and guests will love it.

Know what topics to avoid.

There are a few topics to omit from the best man speech. No matter how funny you (and even the groom) might think they are, someone is bound to be offended or put off if you mention:

• Negativity about marriage in general.
• Past relationships.
• Previous marriages/divorces.
• Drinking, drugs, gambling.
• "Adult" humor or any other mention of sex.

After all, your best man speech should celebrate the newlywed couple and their love rather than causing future friction. Keep it PG.

Consider adding jokes.

If you want to deliver a funny best man speech, consider poking some fun at the groom. "Every groom will have some funny characteristic or quirk you can ridicule," Bliss notes. "As long as it's something everyone can appreciate, it's sure to get a laugh. Avoid obscure references or inside jokes. You want older guests and those who don't know him well to see the funny side too." Be strategic about your jokes too. You can make jokes about the groom but leave their new spouse alone.

Write it down.

Even those with a great memory will feel more confident with a written speech or at least a few bullet points to keep them on track. Nerves can mess with your memory, so don't think you're a failure if you have to bring notes with you. (Even CEOs do this at corporate events.) Bliss suggests using small note cards instead of a sheet of paper since they "won't flap around."

And yes we know many groomsmen will want to read off their cell phones out of convenience, but wedding planners recommend against it. The lighting from your phone screen can ruin the wedding photographer's photos and can be distracting to guests. Practice writing down your speech instead—it's quite soothing.

Practice with an audience.

This tip is a must when it comes to writing a best man speech. Even if you think you have this whole thing in the bag, practice delivering your wedding speech aloud at least three times. When you're by yourself, take a video and watch the playback to get a feel for how your speech is going. (Do you say "um" between every sentence? Are your gestures a little robotic?) If your friends can't offer critiques in person, "send [the video] to a close friend who won't be going to the wedding and who can give you honest feedback," Bliss recommends.

Finally: don't mumble. A great best man speech becomes boring if it's monotonous or guests are straining to hear you. Speak confidently and slowly.

Best Man Frequently Asked Questions

If this is your first time giving a best man speech, you might have a lot of questions. Here are answers to the top wedding speech inquiries.

How Long Should a Best Man Speech Be?

In general, the best man speech length should be at least three minutes, but no more than five minutes. This is enough time to say something meaningful before guests get too antsy. Of course, you should adjust your speech length to the event. If you're speaking at a last-minute wedding, it might require a brief speech, while a formal affair could call for a longer toast. But you might also be wondering, "how many words should a best man speech be?" We suggest between 700 to 1000 words.

How to Start a Best Man Speech

Begin your speech by addressing the audience and thanking them for attending the wedding. Here's an example, "Hello, everyone. On behalf of the newlyweds, I want to thank everyone for attending this amazing celebration." You can even butter up the crowd by saying how lovely everyone looks this evening. Then, introduce yourself and how you know the groom or couple. This is a great opportunity to add a funny story or memory you have with them that can lead you into the rest of your speech.

How to End a Best Man Speech

Raise your glass and offer a toast wishing the couple a lifetime of happiness, excellent health and success. Your toast can include one final joke or be a marriage quote from your and the groom's favorite movie. Either way, take this chance to sincerely express the newlyweds well. Remember, concluding the speech is the easiest part.

Does the Best Man Have to Give a Speech?

It's not required, but it's expected that the best man gives a speech—especially if the other honor attendants are giving one. If speaking in public makes your stomach turn, consider showing your appreciation for the couple in a different way. We've seen best men do upbeat choreography, sing the couple's favorite song or even present a wedding video they made.

When Does the Best Man Give His Speech?

Following the traditional wedding speech order , the best man speaks after the maid of honor and is the last speech during the reception. There's no need to use this itinerary since the speech order depends on your reception timeline and wedding party size. The to-be-weds might even ask you to deliver your speech during the rehearsal dinner, which most likely will be in front of a smaller audience (score!). Before the wedding and during, double-check with the couple to ensure you know when to give your best man speech so no one has to hunt you down when it's your turn.

Nailing Your Best Man

Over the last couple of decades, best men speeches have become over-the-top, clichéd, and generally a bit embarrassing (for the best man, not the groom ironically).

Writing a great best man speech is actually pretty simple. Granted, the Speechy team are TV scriptwriters by trade, so we’ve got a head-start, but we’re happy to share the techniques we use to create original humour without resorting to cheesy ‘jokes’ or alcohol.

Our advice has featured everywhere from The New York Times to The Times . As the only wedding speech experts invited on to BBC Sounds ‘Best Men podcast with Jason Manford we have all the advice you need to nail it. 

* Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out our best man template , speech edit, or bespoke service . Or, work with our new AI-powered team member – SpeechyAI!

Best Man Speech Etiquette

These days, best man speech etiquette is simply about doing a good job and not offending anyone. It’s not overly complicated. 

Don’t feel you need to be overly posh or formal just because you’re wearing a suit. There’s no need to address everyone as ‘ladies & gentleman’ ; a ‘well, hello everyone’ will suffice. 

Don’t buy into any ‘wedding waffle’, you don’t need to thank anyone or mention how lovely the venue is. Certainly don’t bother thanking the groom on behalf of the bridesmaids. That concept died out a long time ago! 

Here’s what you need to know…

1. How to start your best man speech

Many folk assume the first couple of sentences have to be a version of … ‘Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I’m (NAME) and I’m honoured to be (groom’s) best man today.’

Actually, no it doesn’t. Sometimes it can be. But it shouldn’t be automatic. Ask yourself if there’s anything more exciting.

Don’t waste people’s time with the same dull speech-fodder. Every word should count, so consider forgetting the ‘hellos’ altogether.

Controversial, we know.

The trick is to make the opening personal. Cut out the wedding white noise. Instead, cut to the punchline.

ALTERNATIVE OPENINGS

• Jump right in. ‘So they’ve finally done it. Sophie has agreed to put up with Rohan for the rest of her life and he’s got that in writing.’
• Address your audience. ‘Hands up who’s ever had to look after Stephen when he’s had a few beers?’
• Short and snappy. If there has been a delay to the wedding – a swift ‘Well, let’s start with the elephant in the room. Why has the gorgeous, talented Mario, married a bright orange lad from Croydon who still can’t spell?’
• Start with a story. ‘Let me tell you a story… when I first saw Tom, sitting in the bar, reading a book in the middle of the Saturday night chaos, I knew I had to speak to him. Only he was too absorbed in his John Grisham to notice me.’

2. Pay a genuine tribute to the groom

We can get a bit too excited about the prospect of  roasting our mates, but we do have to be nice about them to.

Remember, if it’s a straight wedding, the groom doesn’t (generally) get anyone paying a decent tribute to him. No one telling him how handsome he looks, what a wonderful son he is or what a great husband he’s going to be. 

So, as much as there’s an expectation for you to be funny, you should be nice too. Bonus points if you can make him cry 😉 Now, that would be funny.

3. And a decent tribute to his partner too

The best man must compliment the groom’s partner and it helps if this sounds sincere. 

If you don’t know them well, do a bit of research so you can say more than the usual platitudes. Ditch the ‘you’ve made him a better man’ cliche and get specific. Have they finally taught him to respond to texts? Have his culinary skills developed beyond a fried egg? 

Of course, you need to pay a bit of a tribute to them too, and don’t just resort to meaningless adjectives like ‘kind’ or ‘funny’. Instead, can they put up a tent better than their husband? Have they turned him into a quinoa fan? 

Be original but remember one cliche is a must; all brides look beautiful.

4. The best man toast & closing lines

Some best men like to compliment and raise a toast to the bridesmaids but it’s actually the newlywed’s job. Your choice really, but keep it short if you do.

We tend to avoid having any toasts within a best man speech, other than the final one at the end.  

According to Debrett’s the best man speech usually includes a toast to ‘Mr and Mrs/Mr [newlywed’s Surname]’ and might announce the cutting of the cake’. At Speechy we prefer to find a unique way to toast the newly-hitched. 

Ideally you want the toast to tie in with a theme or story that you’ve already established earlier in the speech, even if it’s just raising a glass to ‘the coolest couple this side of the Hog’s Head’, or ‘to a lifetime of dancing on tables together’. 

Examples of best man toasts…

• “To the groom, my partner in crime and the guy who finally decided to settle down. May your marriage be as adventurous as our bachelor days, but with fewer embarrassing stories. Cheers!”
• “Here’s to the groom, the man of the hour, and the reason I had to put on a suit today. May your marriage be as strong as your WiFi signal and as enduring as our epic gaming sessions. Cheers, my friend!”
• “As the best man, it’s my duty to embarrass the groom at least once during the speech. So here’s to the guy who once thought ‘Netflix and chill’ literally meant watching Netflix and chilling. May your marriage be filled with better communication than that! Cheers!”
• “To the groom and his new life partner, thank you for giving me the honor of being the best man. May your marriage be as smooth as your pick-up lines and as exciting as our infamous trip to Munich. Here’s to love, laughter, and a happily ever after!”

SpeechyAI  is great at crafting truly unique toasts for best men to deliver on the day! 

5. Best best man speech length

You’re aiming for 8 to 10 minutes for a best man speech (a bit longer allowing for laughter and ad-libs). It sounds short but no one ever listened to a best man speech and said ‘if only it were longer’.

The wedding experts agree… ‘There’s a great saying; delivering a speech shouldn’t take longer than it does to consummate a marriage.’ Alison Hargreaves, Founder of Guides for Brides .

Even if you have a wealth of material, be strict with yourself. Once you write your first draft, edit it down to half the length, and we guarantee it will be twice as good.

Ernest Hemingway said ‘The first draft of anything is shit’. This is not only true but reassuring.

People are generally more powerful when their words are punchy. It’s the same with jokes – keep ’em snappy.

Lots of sites offer  quick estimates of your speech duration  based on your wordcount and speaking speed. 

6. Keep the language clean(ish)

Obviously don’t swear if there are children present, though a few bloodies, bloomings and bollocks can add an acceptable edge. 

Check with the nearlyweds in advance and read the room on the day. 

We have scripted the odd F-bomb into a speech over the years but that’s been the exception and at exclusively adult-only weddings.

7. Questions the best men should ask the groom

If in doubt, ask the two folk in charge… 

• INTRO – Will you be be introduced by an MC or will you need to introduce yourself?
• THE SPEAKER SCHEDULE – When will you be speaking (stagger your alcohol intake accordingly). 
• SUGGESTED DURATION –  how long do the couple want you to speak? (Occasionally, some couples suggest five minutes or less. We think that’s quite tight so negotiate for between eight and ten minutes on the mic.) 
• EQUIPMENT – Will there be a mic? Will you have time to test it on the morning? If so, it’s  worth making sure you know how far to hold it from your mouth  etc.
• KIDS – Worth knowing if any children or prudish adults are in attendance so you can cater your content appropriately. 

How To Make Your Best Man Speech Funny

Being funny isn’t about finding good jokes on the internet. Avoid any articles like this basically – Maid of Honour Jokes . The jokes will illicit groans not giggles.

Yes, it’s more effort to write original lines but that’s no excuse for jokes about even the cake ‘being in tiers’ or honeymoons in Bangor (Google it if you haven’t already groaned at it!).

Self-deprecation is a brilliant tool to utilise. Arguably, the strongest, most powerful form of comedy. It’s also the safest.

Sometimes, the people who you think will be good sports aren’t.  The only thing that’s 100% safe for you to take the piss out of, is yourself.

Not only is it safe, it’s sensible. Studies have shown that people who use self-deprecating humour are seen as more humble and consequently more emotional intelligent and attractive. Yes, physically attractive.

So, while you don’t want the speech to be all about you, add a few self-depreciating lines in there. 

• “I must say, being chosen as the best man is almost as surprising as the time I tried to assemble Ikea furniture without looking at the instructions. Somehow, I got through both experiences, but I can’t promise the speech will be as sturdy as that bookshelf.”
• “I was honored when the groom asked me to be his best man. I guess he figured that with my shiny head, I would reflect his good taste. So, here’s to being the mirror of the groom’s impeccable judgment.”
• “Being the best man is a lot like being vertically challenged – it comes with its own set of challenges, like reaching the top shelf and convincing people that I’m not a lost child at the wedding. But here I am, ready to give a speech without the need for a step ladder.”

Start by thinking about the things that make the groom unique. Everyone’s a nut-job in their own way, so what traits will his friends and family recognise as truly ‘him’?

Ask yourself lots of questions – what’s his worst habit (skinny jeans), what’s his guilty pleasures (Dire Straits), what might he love more than his bride/groom (Abdul’s kebabs), what’s odd about him (his unusually short T-Rex arms).

Once you have good content to play with, the comedy will be much easier to find.

Imagine the groom was the central character in a sitcom. What type of person would he be?

The health freak who transforms into a borritos-eating monster after a pint? The workaholic engineer who still calls on his elderly dad to help him with Ikea flatpack? The family man who has a secret life in his shed?

Once you find a basic premise, use anecdotes to help build on the character you’ve created.

Good writing is all you need for a great speech. Powerpoint and props can often get in the way and stress you out.  Once you’ve committed to the projector, you’ve got to keep using it throughout the speech which can really restrict the content and tie you up in knots. And really, once you’ve seen one mullet, you’ve seen them all. 

Instead, concentrate your efforts on good writing. Keep your speech short and your jokes punchy. As Jason & Steve point out ‘When you’re starting off on the comedy circuit, you get a MAXIMUM of five minutes on stage. When you get really good – you get seven’.

One great joke is better than a dozen average ones.

A little comedy writers tip for you. 

The callback is where you plant a story or a piece of info at the start of the speech, possibly as a throwaway line, and then reference it later on. It makes it seem that you’ve been working up to that punchline the whole time and suggests you’re smarter than you are.

For example, you tell a story about how the groom accidentally stapled his shoes to the floor when he was renovating his first house. Later, you conclude your speech by wishing the couple a life adventure and travelling the world ‘…just make sure he doesn’t staple his shoes to the floor before you get the chance to leave.’

The callback is basically establishing an inside joke that everyone is part of.

To make it work

• Plant something funny, and crucially, memorable in the first third of your speech.
• Then simple refer to it towards the end of your speech.

Voila. You’ve become a comedy pro.

While plagarism and stealing other people’s ideas isn’t on, quoting other people is totally legitimate. 

Check out our ‘Best Man Quotes’ post to see how a they can help super-charge your speech. 

Check out some  best man speech videos  we’ve collated, or have a read of  Boris Johnson’s wedding speech as imagined by the Speechy Team. It will give you an idea of how professional comedy writers craft humorous lines. 

Of course, if all this advice has done nothing but convince you, you need help – then jump straight to all the different ways the Speechy team can help you , including  SpeechyAI ;  a genius tool we’ve built that’s guaranteed to help you develop unique and hilarious lines. Honestly, it’s bloody good. 

How to Write & Deliver A Best Man Speech

So you get the principle of what you need to do, here’s how to do it… 

First step in writing your speech is to make sure you have blooming great content. You might think you have loads of good stories already but there will be better out there, so get digging and get dirty.

Email your mates and ask for their favourite groom stories – times he’s been clueless / his quirky faults / embarrassing moments – you know the deal.

Tap up the groom’s family for any classic tales from his childhood and find out if the groom’s partner is giving a speech. If not – get them onside to dish the dirt. They might relish having their say and sharing the reality of living with him.

Ask them how the groom could become a better husband. Find out what he does that annoys them. Surprise him (and everyone else) with your inner knowledge of his relationship.

It’s simple really…

• Introduce yourself and how you know the groom 
• Script a laugh as soon as possible; within the first 20 seconds. 
• Establish the main theme of your speech (we’ll get to that next) 
• Tell a few great stories which illustrate the groom’s characteristics in action. This should make up about two thirds of your speech. 
• Then, bring in the ‘saviour’ – that is, the groom’s partner. Describe witnessing the groom fall in love and the influence their new spouse has had on them. 
• Pay a (short but heartfelt) tribute to the groom’s partner.
• Sum up your happiness (relief?) at their union 
• Pay a more thoughtful tribute to the groom; highlighting his best character traits and illustrating your love for him
• Sum up the theme of your speech with a funny line and propose a toast to the couple. 

The majority of best men resort to the classic ‘reasons the groom is an idiot’ as their narrative hook but dude, make some effort.

Rather than just a collection of anecdotes and obvious punchlines, build a narrative, a proper story, and make sure your speech is crafted rather than just a cut and paste job.

The theme doesn’t need to be complicated, it might just be a retelling of your bro-mance and its tragic end when the bride came on the scene.  If the groom’s now a vaguely respectable teacher,  reveal the alarming things he’s taught you over the years (snorting Sambuca etc). If he’s a wannabe musician,  chronicle his life through musical eras. Or use Yoda quotes to give him marriage advice if he’s a hardcore Star Wars fan.

Finding the right theme obviously depends on the personality of the groom but crack it, and you’re half way there.

‘Even with the funny stories, it has to have a point. Don’t tell me about the drunken trip on holiday or whatever; tell me something that has a meaning to it, something that ties into the theme of the speech. Even the humour has to feel connected and revealing.’ Eduardo Braniff, Men’s Vows

Don’t resort to clichés about him being a ‘top bloke’ without providing the evidence that he is.

Prove – don’t tell. Avoid using too many adjectives. Give specific examples of these qualities in action.

Pinpoint the things you genuinely like about him. Is he the only friend who shares your fascination with Elon Musk? Is he the one person who makes you feel better about your DIY skills? Is he still the mate with cool music suggestions?

Remember to keep it NUT – Nice, Unique and True(ish).

A confident delivery is half the battle, and not everyone feels comfortable public speaking. 

Make sure the groom has checked the acoustics of the venue & there’s a mic there if you need it (so many speeches are ruined just because the guests can’t hear them).

In advance, try to memorise the speech but don’t be afraid to use notes on the day. Delivering without notes is like ‘doing a wheelie’; pretty cool but, ultimately, unnecessary. It’s just showing off really.

So what’s best for your notes? Paper, cue cards or tech?

It comes down to personal preference but we recommend, old school A4 paper.

Mobiles and iPads are increasingly being used and they will inevitably become more prevalent, but we’re not convinced.  Tech may be what you expect a modern best man to use but it looks overly casual and sends out the wrong message.How many of us get annoyed when our loved ones get lost looking at a screen? 

If you decide to use paper, opt for thick A4 but only print 3/4 of the way down so you can maintain eye contact with your audience. 

More delivery tips in our Wedding Ideas article or in our Delivery Blog. 

‘When I’m preparing for a speech, I record myself and listen to it repeatedly. In the car, at home, wherever. I then try to improve it, record that next version and then listen to that repeatedly.

I keep repeating the process until the speech becomes this song, a melody that’s ingrained in me. Given enough time, delivering your speech can feel like singing along to your favourite song.’ Alan Berg, Public Speaking Expert 

What you’re aiming for is a conversational tone. You want the pace of a chat with your friends, anywhere between 130 and 170 words per minute.

Time yourself and check your pace.

A pause is essential when you expect laughter, and you should never talk over it once it lands. Speakers often move on from the joke too quickly and don’t give their audience a chance to react.

Body language is a biggie. As well as sounding relaxed, you need to look relaxed. An audience picks up body language cues. If you seem relaxed, your audience will feel in safe hands. 

When we work with clients in our Delivery Coaching Sessions , one of the things we often need to remind people is to… smile. It seems obvious but, even on such a happy day, people can often forget to look like they’re enjoying themselves and it is SO important. 

A smile is literally infectious, so make the most of it. Even a fake smile tricks your body into relaxing so make the most of it. 

‘My number one piece of advice would always be to time your drinks! You don’t want to hear your name called and realise you’ve had one too many to read your cue cards.

Something else I always notice in a great speech is eye contact. Try to consciously address the person you’re speaking to or about.’ Hamish Shephard, Founder of Bridebook

If you do find yourself getting heckled at the wedding reception, the first thing to bear in mind is not to panic. Even if you feel frustrated that someone has ruined your flow – take it in good humour and see it as an opportunity to get an extra laugh.

Use any laughter or noise that the heckler’s comment gets to choose your response.

If they don’t get any laughter then you don’t need to do much to win – a simple, “Let’s move on shall we…”, or “They say it’s good to talk but I think you’ve just proved it’s not always true…” should be enough.

HERE ARE SOME OTHER OPTIONS TO CONSIDER… 1. (If it’s a free bar) And that’s why the free bar ends after the first drink… 2. (If it’s not a free bar) And that’s why you don’t get a free bar… 3. And there’s another alcoholic who doesn’t want to remain anonymous. 4. You may laugh but because he’s here today there’s a village going without its idiot. 5. Of course one of the nice things about a wedding is that everyone has their role. The bride has to look beautiful, the best man has to make a speech and someone has to have too much to drink and make a fool of themselves, thanks for taking care of that for us. 6. I know the bride and groom had a long discussion when they were doing the seating plan about whether they could get away with putting you on a table on your own, in Luton.

Speech Do's

Check with the groom.

Anything he wants you to do (other than not abusing him)? Anything he’d like you not to mention?!?

Practice and film it on your phone

Watch it back, promise yourself you’ll do something about your gut and spot where your speech can be improved.

Have back-up notes on the day

Give a spare copy to a trusted mate in advance (or email it to your phone).

Do not rush

You might feel tempted to rush through it – but instead, imagine you’re a primary school teacher telling a story to a bunch of five year-olds. Get expressive, use your body and lose your inhibitions. 

Remember everyone wants you to do well so make sure you smile. It’s scientifically proven to be infectious.

Check out our guides

If you’re delivering a joint best man speech or you’re the brother of the groom, check out our specific guides. 

We offer a brother of the groom template is you need more than advice. 

Speech Don'ts

Don't thank anyone.

In the past, the best man used to thank the newlyweds on behalf of the wedding party but these days, the best man’s speech is all about providing the entertainment and a tribute to the groom. 

Don't ignore the feedback of friends

It’s always worth testing your speech out on a mate, but this also means you have to listen to them. If they don’t get a joke, don’t waste your time explaining it as you won’t be able to do that on the day.

Don't talk over laughter

You’ve worked hard for those laughs – don’t rush them. Always wait until the guests have settled down before continuing with your speech.

Don't resort to 'in jokes'

Remember there are grannies out there. And a lot of people who weren’t on the stag and won’t find the story about Tika the waitress and her hairy chicken quite so funny.

Don't mention the ex

Even if you have a wealth of material, sorry, the rule still applies. Don’t mention exes.

Best Man - let us help you!

If you want to deliver a legendary speech, work with us. We’re rated ‘excellent’ on Trustpilot and that’s why we offer a DELIGHT GUARANTEE on all our bespoke services. And, of course, in the world of Zoom, Whatsapp and Death Wish Coffee, we work with best men around the world.

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How to Write a Best Man Speech in 9 Simple Steps

Been tasked to write a best man speech and not sure where to start? Follow these easy rules for how to write a best man speech—and how to deliver it like a total pro.

Valorie Darling Photography

Being enlisted as someone's best man is a big deal, and there are plenty of  best man duties  involved—including figuring out how to write a best man speech. Yes, it’s tradition for the best man to give a wedding speech during the reception, so it’s time to prep for that responsibility. If you’re feeling a little nervous about giving a toast in front of a crowd, that’s totally normal, especially if public speaking isn’t your forte. But with a little forethought, planning, and a lot of practice, you’ll be wowing everyone with your best man speech in no time. Here are nine steps to writing a short best man speech that's sweet and to the point—and how you can ace the delivery. 

How to Write a Great Best Man Speech

Follow this best man speech template to easily get started when it's time to write your own wedding toast. 

1. Plan out your best man speech ahead of time.

Presuming you’re not reading this the night before the wedding, you should give yourself plenty of time—at least one month—to write your best man speech. The weeks leading up to the wedding day, especially participating as such a crucial part of the wedding party, can become hectic. With all of the events you’ll be encouraged or required to attend (on top of keeping up with your own personal life), you may very well lose sight of time. It’s better to plan ahead so you relieve some of the pressure when it's time to write an awesome best man speech.

2. Start your best man speech by expressing gratitude.

If you’re wondering how to write a best man speech, we recommend beginning the speech by stepping onto the dance floor and saying good evening to the crowd (you can write this as a note at the top of your speech as a reminder in case you get nervous). The opening line of your speech should introduce yourself as the best man and then express gratitude to those you think deserve a special shout out. Thank the couple’s parents for raising such great people, thank your friend for having you here, thank the guests for coming, and maybe throw in a one-liner thanking the bartender for a few laughs. It’s a low-key way to break the ice, ease yourself into the best man speech, and make sure those who deserve thanks feel appreciated.

3. Then, talk about your relationship with the groom.

Beyond introducing your name, a big part of how to write a best man speech is talking about your relationship with the groom. Talk about how you met him, how long you've known each other, and what kind of great friend he is. If you can think of an anecdote or funny story that really sums up the kind of person he is, whether that’s charming, warm-hearted, or thoughtful, use it. A funny best man speech is always memorable, but if you’re going to use an anecdote, linking that story to his partner when possible will make it even more meaningful. For example, maybe he’s incredibly outgoing but forgetful, while his new spouse is more thoughtful and organized. If you start with an anecdote of his forgetfulness and later follow up with a time you saw his partner’s organizational skills help him out big time—and that’s a moment you knew they were the real deal—that’s a perfect icebreaker.

4. Focus on the couple's relationship, and not just your own.

Presuming you’ve known the groom for longer than he’s know his partner, you can definitely start your best man toast by sharing an inside joke and recalling the earlier times in your friendship, but then you should skip ahead to when he met his partner. Think of a story that epitomizes their relationship. If you can talk about the exact moment when you realized his partner was “The One” for him, include that. Maybe your buddy told you one week after meeting his partner that they were going to get married, and you thought he was absolutely bonkers, but here you are. Maybe you’ve known the groom for a long, long time—for example, if you’re his brother or you've been best friends since elementary school. You’ve probably always had an idea of what his perfect partner would look like, but the one sitting in front of you exceeds all expectations. Emphasize that he's a great guy and how happy you are for your pal that he’s found someone so perfect for him.

Front Room Studios

5. Keep your best man speech short and sweet.

In terms of  wedding speech order , the best man speech is typically first, followed by the  maid of honor's toast  and parent speeches or  father-of-the-bride-speech . Even though you'll go first, a good best man speech is short and sweet, since you want to avoid people growing restless during the later speeches (guests are ready to eat, drink, and dance at this point of the wedding reception). Aim for a short best man speech between three and five minutes max. Keep in mind that it will feel much shorter to you when you’re actually giving the speech, and you will likely rush through it a little bit in the spotlight. That’s why you must…

7. Practice, practice, practice.

One of the most crucial best man speech tips is that you have to—and we mean  have to— practice your speech  before the wedding. You should read it to yourself out loud at least three or four times ahead of the actual reception. It might feel awkward at first, but would you rather fumble your words alone in private with the chance to make improvements, or give your speech for the first time while being watched by dozens of people with camera phones? Record yourself giving the speech, then replay it for mistakes and things to change. Not only is practice critical to giving the best performance, but it will give you a confidence boost when the big moment arrives. Consider sending the video to a friend, other groomsmen, or relative to give you honest feedback.

7. Write it down.

You should try to memorize your best man toast as best you can, but you’ll feel less anxious if you have it written down. Practice your speech enough so you won’t need to stare at the piece of paper the entire time, but jot down the main talking points to easily transition from one part to the next. Consider using notecards or a small notepad—remember that there's going to be professional photography and videography of your best man speech. Reading from a haphazardly torn piece of scrap paper or worse, your hand, will look sloppy and indicate that you didn’t prepare for the speech.

8. Don’t drink beforehand.

Keep your alcohol intake to a minimum until after you’re finished delivering the best man speech. It's normal to want to calm your nerves, but anything more than one drink during cocktail hour could backfire—alcohol paired with intense nerves and emotions will only amplify them (and you run the risk of slurring your speech!). The more you drink, the less likely you'll be able to remember what you've planned and form cohesive thoughts in the spotlight. Once your speech is over, you'll have time to celebrate all you want. 

9. Finish your best man speech with congratulations and a toast.

This is a foolproof way to end your best man speech. Conclude by congratulating the happy couple on their big day and offer a toast to their lifetime of happiness. The toast can be personal, witty, or a quote. Perhaps there’s a line about love and relationships from one of the groom’s favorite comedians or movies that you can share, or you can simply wish the newlyweds the best and ask your fellow guests to raise their glasses in celebration. 

Things to Avoid In a Best Man Speech

In order to write a good speech, you want to keep the focus off yourself and instead on the happy couple and their future. In general, it's best to steer clear of these things:

1. Inappropriate anecdotes. 

Your pal's grandmother definitely does not need to hear about that one infamous night in college, no matter how relevant or funny it might seem to your buddies. Leave those drunken tales and embarrassing stories for the bachelor party and keep your best man speech PG.

2. Any talk of exes.

Your friend's wedding is absolutely not the time to bring up ex-girlfriends or previous relationships. No matter a how good a story you think it is, or even if it leads directly to the moment you're all in now, just leave it out completely—trust us.

3. Foul language.

Sensing a theme here? You want to make sure your best man speech is well received by everyone, from the 80-year-old guests to the 8-year-old guests. Remember: A wedding is a family event, so it's best to leave out any profanity or other PG-13 talk. 

4. Long-winded stories.

As mentioned previously, you want to keep your best man speech short and sweet. As great as your speech is going to be, the last thing you want is for the wedding guests to tune out halfway through your time in the spotlight. If a story needs more than a few sentences to explain, either pare it down or consider a different approach for writing your best man speech.

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How to Write a Best Man Speech for Your Brother

Not only do you get the pleasure of being the brother of the groom, but you also get to wear the best man title too. Now all that's left is to nail your best man speech.

Delivering a wedding speech can seem daunting at the best of times, but when you're tasked with writing a best man speech for your brother , the stakes are even higher.

But fear not, we're about to make your life  so much easier with a complete guide to best man speeches for a brother, or a friend so close, you feel like you're related. 

The best man speech is a highly anticipated one, as it's your job to get the guests laughing and give people additional insight into who the groom  really  is - keeping it light, of course. 

But when the best man is your brother, you have a whole new realm of stories, anecdotes and memories to use as material.

With so many years side-by-side, you're privy to so much more about the groom than just the college or university days, allowing you to write a best man speech for your brother that no one else could deliver. 

A Complete Guide on Writing a Best Man Speech as a Brother

Packed full of best man speech tips for brothers, here you will find examples  and advice to ensure you nail your big moment. 

How to Structure a Best Man Speech for a Brother

Tips on delivering a best man speech for a brother, best man speech examples for a brother.

When it comes to structuring a best man speech for a brother, the structure is very similar to a regular best man speech for a friend. Whether you're planning on delivering a short best man speech , or a longer one, these are the things you need to include and a baseline structure to follow. 

1. Introduce Yourself

Just because you're the groom's best man  and brother, doesn't mean you get away with not introducing yourself. Every speech, (unless you're a bride or groom) should start with an introduction. It doesn't have to be super long, in fact, we encourage you to keep it short and sweet. 

Tell the room who you are, and start with a bit of background about your relationship with your brother. Are you super close? Have you been attached at the hip since birth? Or has he asked you as more of a formality?

If the latter is the case, that's definitely something you can make light of, saying something like, "We all know [X] should have been best man, but being a blood relative means I take the win here. Although, I don't feel like much of a winner. [X] got to have fun planning the stag do, and I win the less sought-after prize of speaking in front of a room full of people I barely know. Thanks mate [looks at groom]. Anyway, about that stag do..."

2. Share Some Stories

All good speeches are centred around a small handful of brilliant stories and memories. The trick here is to remember 'less is more'. Pick one or two stellar stories, ones perhaps only you could tell as the best man  and brother. 

This is also a great moment to bring your parents into the fold. As a family member, you can speak to the groom's childhood and family set-up better than anyone. Lean into stories that make the groom who he is, but keep things funny versus embarrassing. You don't want anyone in the audience wincing now, do you? 

3. Congratulate the Couple

Congratulating the couple and raising a toast to the newlyweds is an important part of any best man's speech, but even more so when you're giving a best man speech as a brother. 

If you and your siblings are close, it's likely you'll have known your brother's partner almost as long as they have. If you're super close, you could touch on the fact that they've always felt like family and say something like, "As the groom's brother and best man, this is where I'm supposed to welcome [X] into our family, and tell you how happy I am to have gained another sibling, but the truth of the matter is, you've felt like family since the day [X] first brought you home."

For something a little funnier and a bit cheeky, you could say, "Tina, you're a really good person. You value a person's character and personality over the way they look. And if you're wondering how I know this, it's obvious isn't it? Because if you were into looks over personality, you'd have picked the other brother [points at self]."

With the structure down, here are some pointers on how to write and deliver a cracking best man speech for your brother. 

1. Avoid Too Many In-Jokes

As brothers, you're bound to have dozens of inside jokes and things only the two of you understand, and there's no harm in shedding some light on one or two of these, but the problem with including too many in-jokes in a best man speech is that, only the two of you are likely to find it funny. With this, you run the risk of losing the room. 

If you want to touch on more of these, consider writing a letter to give to your brother on the morning of the wedding instead and stick to jokes and stories everyone can relate to for the main speech. 

2. Keep it Clean

One of the biggest mistakes so many people make when delivering best man speeches is going dirty when it's not necessary. You don't have to be rude or crude to be funny, and if one guest feels uncomfortable with stories you're telling, it's one guest too many!

On that, it's bad enough when any of your pals stand up and tell sex stories or crude tales about you in front of your friends and family - so having someone related to you say things like that is  even worse . 

If you're unsure whether or not any of your stories cross the line, sense-check them with someone whose opinion you trust. 

3. Less is More

As the best man and brother, you will likely have more stories and memories than anyone in the room, but that doesn't mean you have to tell every single one. Pick two or three (at the most) to share with the crowd and only spend a minute or two on each.

4. Sentiment is Key

A bit of sentiment and emotion in any speech is golden, but even more so when you're giving a best man and brother speech about the groom. Jokes are great, but they land even better when a bit of emotion is peppered in-between. Trust us! Don't be afraid to say some sweet things too, we guarantee the audience will love it and so will your brother. 

5. Remember the Jokes

Like we said, a mixture of heartfelt words and funny one-liners is golden when it comes to best man speeches - but to nail that balance, you need jokes! Not every line needs to be a joke, but you need some in your introduction, one or two within the story, and one to end on. 

Jordanna Marston Photography

Need some practical inspiration for your best man speech as a brother? If so, you've come to the right place. 

No one can write a speech about your brother better than you can, but we can give you some starting points which you can build on. 

Best Man Speech for a Brother: Introduction Examples

• If you’re a bit of a joker: “I’m Tom, Paul’s best man and also his big brother. I think it says a lot about a man when he chooses his brother to be his best man…. Mostly, of course, it says: 'I have no friends'.”
• Another one for the jokers: “For those of you who don`t know me, I'm Andrew, Charlie's younger brother. It's great to be stood up here today because, after all these years, Charlie has finally admitted that I am the best man.”
• If your brother has two best men: “For those who don’t know me, my name is Sam and I’m today’s best brother. I say best brother, as there’s less competition in that category than in the best man competition, and if you like Craig’s speech better then at least I still win at something.”
• If two brothers are giving a speech: "Hi, I'm Callum and this is Cameron. We're Scott's brothers, [pause] and we know what you're thinking, how are his brothers  so much better looking than him. And trust us, we've been asking ourselves the same question for years."
• If you’re feeling sentimental: “For those that don’t know much about mine and Steve’s relationship, let me fill you in a bit. I’m the older one, which means I’ve been about for his entire life. I’ve had the privilege of watching him grow into the best man I know, aside from our own father.”

 Best Man Speech for a Brother: Family Story Examples

• “Our parents have always had an almost uncanny ability to know what’s going on in our lives. When Paul found me smoking in the back garden when I was 13, our parents were the first to know. When he spotted me setting off fireworks from my bedroom window, our parents were the first to know. When Paul saw me taking… Hey! Wait a minute! My brother’s a snitch!”
• “Other than the couple themselves, I don’t think anyone here is more happy to see Paul getting married than our parents. They’ve been an amazing role model for me and Paul. They’ve been married for thirty years, and they are still as loving and loyal as ever. It’s their love that forms the bedrock of the happy, supportive and loving family before you now. The only thing that was missing, until today, was [brother's partner].”
• “Brothers remember staying up late with dad and then rushing to bed when we heard mum come home. Brothers understand that what mum doesn’t know won’t hurt her and that nobody likes a turtle tail. Brothers understand that farting at the dinner table will earn you dish duty but then if you make it silent you can blame it on someone else. Andrew. Though if you blame it on mum, that will definitely earn you dish duty. Brothers share childhood memories and grown up dreams.”

  Best Man Speech for a Brother: Sibling Story Examples

• “There's three of us brothers, I was planned, Jack was an accident and the groom, Mike, was the girl they always wanted, but never got.”
• “Brian and I have been brothers for 35 years now. In the course of 35 years, you really get to know someone well. I’ve seen him go from an annoying little kid to the slightly less annoying guy you see today.”
• “Michael took his role as my big brother very seriously when we were kids. He beat me up, stole my stuff, embarrassed me in front of my friends and told our parents whenever I did anything wrong. Anyway, it’s a real honour to be giving this best man’s speech today… or as I call it, pay back.”

 Best Man Speech for a Brother: Joke Examples

• “A recent study has revealed that 66% of people in Britain are addicted to puzzles – which means at least two-thirds of you must be trying to work out what on earth Jack sees in Mark.”
• “One of my earliest memories of Joe was him telling jokes that made absolutely no sense. Those of you who knew Joe as a kid will understand what I’m saying. He’d say something like… ‘Why did the chicken cross the road? Because granddad doesn’t like ice cream.’ FYI, Joe’s jokes today aren’t much funnier.”
• “We all know [brother's partner] is a wonderful person who deserves the perfect guy. Too bad you don’t always get what you deserve.”
• “Myself and Tom were lucky enough to be taken on lots of exciting holidays and day trips when we were younger. They’re where some of my most embarrassing stories come from…”

 Best Man Speech for a Brother: Examples Talking About the Partner

• "[Partner's name], welcome to the family. You really have hit the jackpot, gaining the family surname, a season ticket to Crystal Palace and a lifetime supply of political debates at the dinner table. That's what dreams are made of!"
• “I’m over the moon to be welcoming [partner's name] into the family. We all love you very much and I’m sure you’ll find us to be a warm and supportive bunch. Just – and I can’t stress this enough – steer clear of Monopoly. Seriously. If the box comes out, just run.”
• “[Partner name] is something of a miracle worker. They took the misshapen lump of human Play-Doh that I call my brother, and moulded him into a man. Let’s hope it lasts. And if he does start to get brittle or droopy in his old age, just sprinkle him with water, roll him around a bit, and draw a smiley face on him with a sharp stick.”
• “[Partner name], you look absolutely beautiful tonight, I can think of no-one else that I’d rather have join our family or who would be a better spouse to Brian than you. You are generous, selfless, loving and kind.”

To guarantee the laughs, check out these best man speech jokes - we promise, they're better than the ones you've heard before! 

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