to each her own movie review

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To each, her own, common sense media reviewers.

Overloaded farce about sexual orientation; language, sex.

A Lot or a Little?

What you will—and won't—find in this movie.

Sexuality and sexual preference can be confusing.

Lead character negotiates a confusing world, not a

Two scuffles that are almost immediately stopped.

Story is about sexuality and sexual orientation. C

Subtitled profanity: "f--k, "s--t," "crap," "piss,

Characters drink alcohol throughout; drunkenness i

Parents need to know that To Each, Her Own is a French comedy with subtitles about a young professional woman in a long-term relationship with another woman. Still closeted to her family and finding herself attracted to a man, she's confused and despairing. A series of farcical adventures help her come to…

Positive Messages

Sexuality and sexual preference can be confusing. Fight bigotry. Stand up for your right to be yourself.

Positive Role Models

Lead character negotiates a confusing world, not always successfully; she learns to be forthright and confident. Stereotypes: overbearing parents (including one shrewish and racist Jewish mother and a racist Senegalese aunt), ineffectual dad, LGBTQ folks, racists, homophobes.

Violence & Scariness

Did you know you can flag iffy content? Adjust limits for Violence & Scariness in your kid's entertainment guide.

Sex, Romance & Nudity

Story is about sexuality and sexual orientation. Characters kiss, disrobe (breasts are shown), engage in foreplay. Implied oral sex. Conversations about sex, sexual identity. Sexy dancing and glimpses of sexy underwear.

Did you know you can flag iffy content? Adjust limits for Sex, Romance & Nudity in your kid's entertainment guide.

Subtitled profanity: "f--k, "s--t," "crap," "piss," "screwing," "hell," t-ts." Insults: "f---ing dyke," "homosexuality is a disease," "f---ing closet het."

Did you know you can flag iffy content? Adjust limits for Language in your kid's entertainment guide.

Drinking, Drugs & Smoking

Characters drink alcohol throughout; drunkenness in one sequence. Marijuana is smoked.

Did you know you can flag iffy content? Adjust limits for Drinking, Drugs & Smoking in your kid's entertainment guide.

Parents Need to Know

Parents need to know that To Each, Her Own is a French comedy with subtitles about a young professional woman in a long-term relationship with another woman. Still closeted to her family and finding herself attracted to a man, she's confused and despairing. A series of farcical adventures help her come to terms with both her sexual orientation and her role as a woman independent from the traditions that have been thrust upon her. Sexual situations occur throughout the film. Characters kiss, disrobe (breasts are exposed), and engage in implied oral sex and off-camera sexual intercourse. Sex moves the central thread of the story. Racism, anti-Semitism, homophobia, and overbearing parents fully impact the romantic relationships as well. Audiences can expect multiple stereotypical characters and behavior (e.g., gays, lesbians, a large Jewish family, online dating). Swearing and obscenities are used, including "f--k," "s--t," "piss," "crap," "screw," and "dyke." Alcohol is consumed in numerous scenes; in one, the heroine gets drunk. Young adults roll joints and smoke marijuana. To stay in the loop on more movies like this, you can sign up for weekly Family Movie Night emails .

Where to Watch

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Community Reviews

• Parents say (1)

Based on 1 parent review

Very unusual romcom

What's the story.

Simone Benloulou (Sarah Stern) is in love with Claire (Julia Piaton) in TO EACH, HER OWN. They have a long-term relationship and have built a nice life together. Unfortunately, Simone hasn't had the courage to tell her observant Jewish family about either her sexual orientation or Claire. Because of that, her overbearing mother (Caroline Jacob) never stops nagging her about finding "the one," providing he's Jewish and suitable. Simone's inaction is getting her down, and she feels more confused and distracted when she finds herself attracted to Wali (Jean-Christophe Folly), a talented Senegalese chef. Is she a lesbian? Is she "bi"? A coward? She's further challenged by events that cause her to doubt herself even more severely: an approaching family wedding, an inevitable "fix-up" by her brother, a romantic encounter with Wali, and finally Claire's discovery of Simone's true state of mind.

Is It Any Good?

Too many themes, characters, and storylines distract from the emotional journey of the heroine until nothing is left but a spirited pace, some funny moments, and a shallow resolution. There are many caricatures -- gays, lesbians, Jewish families, newly assimilated African citizens, arrogant business types -- in To Each, Her Own. That , along with unabashedly racist and homophobic situations that are meant to be funny but often just feel grating, seems to have defeated what might have been an enjoyable film. As it is, it's hard to keep track of the couple who met online, the couple who are about to be married, the gay couple struggling for acceptance, let alone the adventures of Simone and Claire ... and Wali. Prepare to be confused, especially with the sudden ending, which comes out of left field.

Talk to Your Kids About ...

Families can talk about the value of watching movies from non-English-speaking cultures. What new information about today's France and its people did you take away from To Each, Her Own ? Do such experiences reinforce your feelings about the commonality of the human condition? In what ways?

How could communication skills have helped Sarah negotiate her journey? Why is it important to develop solid communication skills?

Is it possible that when filmmakers include multiple storylines and characters, both the events and the people involved are less complex and interesting? Which characters, if any, are stereotypes in this movie?

Movie Details

• On DVD or streaming : June 24, 2018
• Cast : Sarah Stern , Julia Piaton , Jean-Christophe Folly
• Director : Myriam Aziza
• Inclusion Information : Female actors, Black actors
• Studio : Netflix
• Genre : Comedy
• Topics : Friendship
• Run time : 95 minutes
• MPAA rating : NR
• Last updated : February 18, 2023

Did we miss something on diversity?

Research shows a connection between kids' healthy self-esteem and positive portrayals in media. That's why we've added a new "Diverse Representations" section to our reviews that will be rolling out on an ongoing basis. You can help us help kids by suggesting a diversity update.

Suggest an Update

Our editors recommend.

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Stream It or Skip It: ‘To Each Her Own’ on Netflix Is A Bisexual Farce Set in France

Where to Stream:

• To Each, Her Own (2018)

Netflix’s latest foreign title,  To Each, Her Own , takes the form of a farcical comedy of sex and sexuality among a trio of modern Parisians. A Jewish lesbian, her live-in girlfriend, and the enticing Senegalese man she meets and can’t get out of her head. It’s a modern story of hangups and declarations, but is it worth a stream?

TO EACH HER OWN : STREAM IT OR SKIP IT?

The Gist: Simone (Sarah Stern) comes from a conservative Jewish family in Paris. She doesn’t practice, which causes enough of a rift in her family that she has kept secret the other un-conservative part of her life: her wife, Claire (Julia Piaton). Simone’s life gets thrown for a loop when she meets a handsome Senegalese man named Wali who can cook, and they end up making out on a dance floor. Was this a one-time thing?  Does this prove her parents right? Wali is still not the good Jewish man her parents have in mind for her. The secrets start piling up in a comedic farce that touches on sexuality, religion, and race from many odd angles.

What Movies Will It Remind You Of?: The whole movie maintains a solidly sitcom vibe, and the English overdubbing gives the entire movie a kind of B-grade madcap flair even when there are real emotions at stake. It’s a flimsy enough romantic comedy that it brings to mind the kind of micro-release gay rom-coms of the 1990s . It doesn’t match the quality of a  Kissing Jessica Stein , but it’s in the same ballpark.

• Stream It Or Skip It

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Performance Worth Watching:  Sarah Stern shoulders a lot in the lead role as Simone. She keeps up distinct relationships with a lot of characters and shows the code-switching that goes on for closeted gay people. She’s different versions of herself with her parents, her brothers, her girlfriend, and with Wali. This was a movie that I kept expecting to go in certain directions, and when it didn’t, I bought it mostly due to Stern’s performance.

Memorable Dialogue:  There are a few lines that linger in the memory. When Wali takes Simone home to meet his friends and cousins, his domineering Auntie shows up as well (and gives Simone one hell of a side eye). She also shouts, “See ya later, druggies!” at the young men for deliquently smoking up in her apartment. That’s pretty funny.

When Simone’s deception is uncovered — in a rather sitcommy development, where the guy she was supposed to go on a date with (an investor in her brother’s J-Date-esque app) shows up at a family gathering, finds out that it was Simone’s friend and not her who went on the date with him, and on top of that learns Simone’s friend wasn’t even Jewish — her brother can only lament, “You’ll destroy my dating site!” Eyes on the prize.

And finally, as the film reaches its climax, Simone comes clean, to her parents and to herself: “That’s Claire, she’s my wife; and that’s Wali, he’s my lover.” Go ahead, bisexuality!

Single Best Shot:  Simone and Wali spend time together but, after she tells him that she’s got a girlfriend, they want to keep things on a friendship level. The cut to this shot. of the two of them asleep with a row of barrier pillows between them, is a solid visual gag.

Our Take:  I’ll say this: in contrast to Netflix’s  Alex Strangelove , which walks up to the precipice of a reasonable and enlightening turn into bisexual visibility, only to step back and move in a more expected direction,  To Each, Her Own actually pulls that trigger and allows its story to recognize the “B” in LGBT. The whys, wherefores, and politics of why lesbian stories are the only ones where bisexuality is allowed to assert itself is a question for another day. For now, props to the film for going there, even if “there” is an overly literal ride into the sunset for the film’s final shot. The rest of the movie feels cartoonish and under-developed. It’s halfway to a good movie, which is worth something, but it’s ultimately a good conclusion in search of anything really substantial to lead up to it. The comedy isn’t all that funny and the romance isn’t all that romantic. An admirable swing, but a miss.

Our Call:  Skip It.

Stream  To Each, Her Own on Netflix

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Home » Movies

To Each, Her Own (Les Goûts Et Les Coloeurs) Review

A Netflix original comedy-drama, To Each, Her Own is about a Jewish woman in Paris, dealing with relationships and prejudices; her own, and other people’s. A personal and entertaining film by Myriam Aziza.

Whilst I was watching Netflix Original Film To Each, Her Own / Les Goûts Et Les Coloeurs a lot went through my mind. For many (or most?) non-straight people, it can be difficult – to say the least – to tell parents about their sexuality.  Even those who don’t find it difficult usually expect it to be. The main character in Love, Simon is a prime example of this: his family is liberal and easygoing, but still treats it as a bit of an ordeal. When, at age nineteen, I told my fairly conservative parents I was bisexual, I had to dare myself to be honest with them: my Mum had to navigate the news with lots of questions, and my Dad didn’t want to know.

But that’s nothing compared to the angst Simone (Sarah Stern) faces about coming out to her parents in To Each, Her Own.  They are conservative Jews; not only that but they appear to have rejected her gay brother, and refuse to meet his civil partner. This theme of being yourself in the face of prejudice has many angles in this French film for Netflix, but the relationship with her parents (Catherine Jacob and Richard Berry) is where the story starts, and almost certainly where Simone’s caution about exposing herself came from.

In To Each, Her Own , Simone’s life gets suddenly more complicated when she finds herself unexpectedly attracted to a man, something which hadn’t happened for many years (at one point, she says she’d been lesbian since eleven). Not just a man, but a man who couldn’t have been more different: Wali (Jean-Christophe Folly) is a black Muslim Senegalese man from Marseille, the chef at a favorite restaurant. He is a very easygoing man, but his friends and family are not; his friends hold some anti-semitic views, which Simone had not come across much in person, and his aunt wants him to marry someone like him. Family pressure and prejudices are complex.

To Each, Her Own is about the complexity of self-discovery, within that atmosphere of bigotry from all directions. That’s hardly going to make things easy! It might have been a little easier if Simone had felt able to talk to her girlfriend, Claire. But, like Simone, the script doesn’t give Claire as much attention as she deserves. That’s probably realistic, mind you. People can get self-centered when trying to figure out themselves.

The writing and acting make the whole thing fairly realistic; plot and characters alike. It might seem unlikely at first, that contrast of individuals I described, but Paris is a true melting pot. It is believable that people like Wali and Simone would meet; and if they could get past the intolerance their communities surround them with, there is no reason why they couldn’t be friends. I found the resolution of the story to be a little unrealistic, mind you, but this was only because of Claire’s point of view being unexplored. But more on the ending in a bit.

I must say the genre is a little difficult to define. Although To Each, Her Own is categorized as a comedy, it isn’t a more traditional French sex comedy or romantic comedy; there’s hardly any sex, and there is more obvious romance amongst the side characters than the main ones. There are some lovely scenes that could have been written as farce, but Aziza doesn’t direct them as farce. What we have here is a study of serious topics (identity and prejudice) but presented lightly and humorously. So it’s comedy as much as Me, Earl and the Dying Girl was.

Slight spoilers from here on…

The title of the Netflix film is interesting. When I came out to my Dad, he told me, “Do what you like, just don’t upset your mother.” The phrase To Each, Her Own (or their own, more traditionally) gives me the same sense of reluctant acceptance; to me, it kind of means people have all sorts of preferences, but I’m not obliged to like them or understand them. I don’t think any of the characters expressed that attitude. The French title, which means “colours and tastes” does more closely reflect the main character, I think; especially in her approach to having broad preferences without a specific label.

And here I must declare my own bias and tell you about another theme of To Each, Her Own : bisexuality. I started watching it half expecting that the man Simone connected with would try to cure or convert her, and so I was on guard. Very happy that Wali didn’t do that, but I am not at all happy at Simone’s aversion to the label “bisexual”. There is a revealing moment when she tells Claire she can still be lesbian despite attraction to a man, and likens it to being Jewish even though she eats pork: she can be a lesbian without being a “pure” lesbian. Granted, that’s near the beginning of her journey, but I would have very much liked to see her reconsider the label later, especially considering the ending. It is incredibly rare to see people on screen being comfortable calling themselves bi, and I firmly believe that representation needed in media includes characters being able to say the words for their sexual orientation, not just presenting it. We see her own aversion to it, and we also see some fairly standard reactions and myths played out by others.

And the ending. I’m sorry, but despite having liked the film overall – especially the well-drawn characters – it wouldn’t surprise me if the ending causes the film to be dismissed by bisexual (and poly) commentators, for two reasons. Firstly, it comes across as though a bisexual person requires two different partners at a time: most don’t. Secondly, modern bisexual people would not simply impose their preferences on their relationships but agree to a way to conduct things that would suit all concerned. I know one film cannot be expected to represent bisexuality on screen, but until there are more films with bisexual themes and characters, single films can create impressions in their viewers, just as Bound gave the impression that girl-girl relationships require one butch and one femme. And unfortunately, it is realistic that someone navigating bisexuality for the first time – like Simone – might have these misconceptions herself too.

Spoilers over.

Please do watch Netflix Original  To Each, Her Own . It’s great to have more well-written characters, believable stories with queer themes. But please remember my caveat: this is one woman’s journey with self-discovery (which probably has farther to go) and does not reflect a typical modern bisexual experience.

Article by Alix Turner

Alix joined Ready Steady Cut back in 2017, bringing their love for horror movies and nasty gory films. Unsurprisingly, they are Rotten Tomatoes Approved, bringing vast experience in film critiquing. You will likely see Alix enjoying a bloody horror movie or attending a genre festival.

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Film Review – To Each, Her Own (2018)

Before the review officially begins, I must offer this advice:

For the love of everything we hold dear, if you watch this film on Netflix , choose the French audio (and then subtitles, unless you speak French). If you don’t, you’ll end up with the American dubbed version by default. Said dub is so bad, it takes To Each, Her Own down several notches in quality before you even get started.

Okay, moving on…

Directed by: Myriam Aziza

Written by: Myriam Aziza and Denyse Rodriguez-Tome

Starring: Sarah Stern, Jean-Christophe Folly, Julia Piaton, Clémentine Poidatz , Catherine Jacob, Richard Berry

Simone Benloulou (Stern) is a banker with a very complicated juggling act of a life. She has to be a completely different person, depending upon whom she’s with to a nearly Mrs. Doubtfire -like level of complexity, minus the prosthetic makeup. Simone seems to be most authentic in the presence of her “roommate” Claire (Julia Piaton), who is actually her girlfriend of three years. The latter fact is unknown to several key figures in her life, which complicates everything from holiday dinners with family, to everyday conversations. Along comes Wali (Folly), a talented chef from Senegal, who throws Simone’s life into even more turmoil.

Let the shenanigans begin!

image via The Daily Dot

The performances are all quite good, here. The actors handle the comedic, dramatic, and comically dramatic situations with equal skill. The only one who is perhaps a bit over the top is Catherine Jacob as Simone’s mother. Then again, her character is written in such a way that she is less a nuanced person, and more a proverbial “Jewish mother” caricature. So, perhaps it is less about Jacob’s performance, and more about the writing or direction.

Jean-Christophe Folly is a stand out as Wali. He has an expressive face that effectively communicates feeling even when he says nothing. Quite frankly, he is too good for this movie. Folly almost seems aware of that at times — or, perhaps the character knows he is too good for most of the garbage humans with whom he interacts.

Also good are the visuals of the movie: lighting, color palettes, angles. It’s all quite pretty to look at.

image via Bustle

Simone, our main character, is simply unlikable . She is unbelievably selfish, spineless, and irritatingly indecisive. The early scenes have the viewer rooting for Simone, but within the first thirty minutes or so, she’s lost us. One example: she forces her friend and coworker Geraldine (Poidatz) to go on a blind date in her place, which not only requires pretending to be a different person, but a different religion/culture. Geraldine is thrown in to this dinner date, armed only with a minute-long lesson on eating Kosher. All of this farce is required because Simone is too afraid to stand up to her overbearing brother who set her up on a J-Date style website he owns.

image via Popsugar

The Bad… Continued

This movie also suffers for its short run time. There is too much time spent lingering on random things — a single bite of food, for instance — and then important plot points are rushed. This is such an odd choice. Some characters are developed, others are sort of set dressing. Simone’s girlfriend Claire, for instance, isn’t given any kind of backstory or motivation. She’s just there, being all pretty and emotional. She’s like an eye candy one-dimensional “girlfriend character” in a rom-com created by an unenlightened male writer and/or director in some bygone era. Only… To Each, Her Own was written and directed by women . In 2018. Oops.

To be fair, there is also a male eye candy type character who gets no development. His name is Eric Taieb ( Stéphane Debac): he’s attractive, Jewish, and duped into dating gentile Geraldine… thinking all the while she is a Jewish woman named Simone. That’s about all we get to know about him.

Something else this movie suffers from is trying to cram too many topics into one story. It’s as though a group of after-school special or Public Service Announcement writers scribbled social issues down on slips of paper, threw them into a hat, and created this script with the ones they drew out. There is far too much going on. It’s almost like that Glee episode where they covered homophobic bullying, attempted suicide, and the dangers of texting and driving at the same time.

[Slight spoiler ahead]

The most disturbing issue with To Each, Her Own, is the fact that it is presented as an LGBT movie , yet completely misrepresents several aspects of the culture. For instance, not every bisexual/pansexual/questioning person cheats, but that is almost always portrayed in movies. That is an infuriating trope, and it’s a shame to see it continuing in 2018. It is possible (common, in fact) to have a monogamous relationship with a man, and later, a monogamous relationship with a woman. Someone really needs to clue screenwriters in to this fact.

image via Rotten Tomatoes

To Each, Her Own… Indeed

This is a very good title, because at the end of the film, that is what the audience is left thinking. To avoid further spoilers, I will just say that the ending is, to paraphrase Midnight in Paris , “very French.” If you are not a part of the culture(s) represented, it may be hard to wrap your head around the conclusion of this movie. You also may find it hard to comprehend, because it happens so abruptly. Conflict, proposed solution, and agreement take place in about 30 second’s time. It’s downright jarring.

Final Thoughts

The movie had promise in the first few scenes. It was funny, it was charming, and seemed as though it would address many important issues. Then it lost its way, as abruptly as the protagonist did. These topics deserve much better representation than they receive here.

Thanks for reading!  What are your thoughts on To Each, Her Own?  Comment down below!

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Patricia Henderson

Patricia Henderson is a 40-something from Northern California. She has loved both movies and writing since she was a child, so this was a logical choice.

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I agree. I think this is the worst movie I have seen in my life.

It’s so unfortunate. It could have handled all of the same topics in much more respectful and informed ways.

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Review: To Each, Her Own (Les goûts et les couleurs)

To Each, Her Own ( Les goûts et les couleurs ) is a French film now on Netflix. I found the main character irritating in numerous ways, but stuck with it to the end to see what she would finally do. What she finally did was irritating, too.

There are major spoilers ahead.

Simone Benloulou (Sarah Stern) has lived for 3 years with her girlfriend Claire (Julia Piaton). She’s never come out to her parents, although her brother is gay and he’s come out. Simone’s Jewish family is planning a wedding for Simone’s oldest brother and everything happens with wedding plans in the background. Simone wants to bring Claire to the wedding but she can’t get the words about about Claire being her girlfriend.

Simone claims she’s been a lesbian since age 11. Yet one day she’s suddenly attracted to a Senegalese chef named Wali (Jean-Christophe Folly). She has sex with him. He’s a Muslim and everyone in his family, including himself, is anti-Semitic.

Simone confesses to Claire and says she loves her and asks for forgiveness. Claire throws her out. She tells Wali they can only be friends but continues to have sex with him. At no time in the movie does anyone use the word bisexual.

Simone communicates with people about as well as a block of wood. She reunites with Claire and then chases Wali down at his parents house and tells him she wants to be with him.

Simone goes to the wedding alone. Claire comes in one door. Wali comes in another. She kisses them both in front of her parents and they motor off together on Wali’s scooter, apparently a happy threesome.

I found the idea that Claire and Wali would just accept the idea the newly configured relationship with no discussion ridiculous. I also found it strange that a film that was apparently (I say apparently, because I’m not really sure) about a bisexual woman discovering her bisexuality never had Simone even voice the notion that she was bi.

The film seemed to say that bisexuals want to be with both sexes at the same time, which isn’t true. Most bisexuals are monogamous. Or was the film about a woman who discovers she loves two people at the same time? That’s a totally different thing.

I wasn’t so much irritated by what happened in the film, as I was by the lack of clarity about what happened from the main character. She wanders the streets in a daze and apologizes to a light pole when she accidentally bumps into one without realizing it isn’t another person.

To Each, Her Own ( Les goûts et les couleurs ) was written and directed by Myriam Aziza. There were many promising elements in the film – coming out, bisexuality, Jewish/Muslim relationships, parenting, polyamory – but none of those potential plot points really hit the mark.

Kiss 92.5 listed it as one of the LGBTQ movies you must see on Netflix during pride month. I think you’d be happier with one of their other choices.

The preview on Netflix has English subtitles, but I couldn’t find one with subtitles to share here. Now’s the time to polish up your French.

If you enjoyed reading this review written by a real human, please share it with your friends.

7 thoughts on “review: to each, her own (les goûts et les couleurs)”.

Hi. Actually there’s a scene where the word ‘bi’ (for ‘bisexual’) is mentioned, in the French version at least. After Simone kissed Wali at the party and as a consequence on the following day she is to embarassed to go eat at the restaurant where he works, Simone’s friend Geraldine encourages her to just explain to him that she’s in a commited relationship and that she made a mistake (which of course Simone should had thought of by herself), and she tenderly and half jokingly says to her ‘en fait t’es un peu bi’ (‘actually you are a bit of a bi’). At this, Simone answers ‘si j’etais bi je le saurais’ (‘If I were bi I’d know’). And that’s it. No mention at all of bisexuality might possibly have been less ridiculous.

Thanks for that information. My French isn’t good enough to pick up subtle bits like that. Simone’s answer ‘If I were bi I’d know’ doesn’t make me any happier with her.

Being a member of the LGBT community in the U.S., viewing films concerning us is important to me, as an individual and an observer of films, foreign and domestic. After experiencing the liberating Netflix series Sense8, I’ve been utterly spoiled. As fond of French films and/comedies, To Each Her Own totally disappointed me. I know I’m very likely repeating many other comments on this film, but I found it neither amusing nor an honest representation of our community. Stereotypes and main characters flawed with no rational, real emotional values or lessons. Awkward script IMO, and please don’t get me started on the dubbing, I’ve seen and listened to better from Japanese anime series, and Korean films. I read the reviews, but thought I’d give it a chance, my mistake.

I detest dubbing. I would much rather listen to the original actor’s voice, even if it’s in a language I don’t understand a single word of. You can control both the audio and the subtitles on Netflix, but it depends on your device. This page may help: https://help.netflix.com/en/node/372 . Hearing an already mediocre movie with dubbed voices must have been torture.

I agree that Sense8 is an outstanding example of how LGBTQ characters are portrayed in the media. I wanted to give this film a try because of the female director, which is a focus here on the blog. I hope her next film is better.

My copy stopped just before the end , so I was happy to find out how it ended , I had no problem with the lack of communication , seemed totally realistic , and I think that was intensional . I would give it four stars , there was a little slapstick in it that did not work , so for that I take away a star . I know I probably am not the intended audience , for this movie , it’s a chick flick , I hate chick flicks , but I liked this one .

Thanks for the comment, it’s nice to find someone who appreciates a spoiler as much as I do.

Hi! I was ok with the script even thinking the main character was a bit nonsense, but the ending was surrealistic in my opinion. It seems the director couldn’t find a reasonable ending and just ended it like it was a dream from the main character Simone. hahahaha

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To Each, Her Own (2018)

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• Movie - To Each, Her Own - 2018

To Each, Her Own  (2018)  Les goûts et les couleurs

• Release Date: 24 June 2018 (France) (more)
• Genre: Comedy (more)

As Simone thinks of a way to break to her conservative Jewish family the news that she is a lesbian, a chance encounter with a man makes her questions her sexual orientation just before coming out.

• Myriam Aziza (Director)
• Myriam Aziza (Writer)
• Denyse Rodriguez-Tomé ()
• Sarah Stern
• Jean-Christophe Folly
• Catherine Jacob
• Richard Berry
• Arié Elmaleh
• Clémentine Poidatz

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As Simone thinks of a way to break to her conservative Jewish family the news that she is a lesbian, a chance encounter with a man makes her questions her sexual orientation just ...Read more before coming out.

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To Each Her Own (2018)

There are actually two WLW films titled To Each Her Own . The other is a drama made in 2008. Made 10 years later, this movie is allegedly a comedy. However, in order to truly live up to its comedy potential, To Each Her Own needed to be 20% wackier or have 15% less depictions of serious intolerance. Or both. Both probably would have been good.

To Each Her Own follows Simone, a french Jewish lesbian who is not out to her parents. Simone has a stable, long term partner named Claire. However, just as she gets engaged to Claire and feels ready to come out to her parents, Simone finds herself tempted by hitherto unfelt heterosexual urges. The subject of her interest is Wali, a charming, male, Senegalese chef. Simone spends most of the movie working through her romantic feelings towards both Wali and Claire. Her presence in circles of Jewish people, queer people and now Senegalese people leads to misunderstandings and discussions about culture and prejudice.

To Each Her Own has good energy as a movie. What it doesn’t have is a lot of actual jokes that land. As rapid-fire and quirky as the dialogue is, the main story concept and lack of any actual punchlines ensured that at no point did I actually laugh. This movie needed needed more hijinks. It isn’t wacky enough. For a romantic comedy with cases of mistaken identity and surprising love triangles, it needs to be far more over the top. As it currently is, To Each Her Own exists in this awkward middle ground where its characters are too quirky for them to feel realistic or relatable but not ridiculous enough to make for good comedy.

It is a minor miracle that the lead characters aren’t wholly unlikable. Simone is indecisive and plays with the hearts of both her love interests. Wali’s pursuit of her is also something that could very easily delve into creepy territory. That he doesn’t is a testament to how charming and likable actor Jean-Christophe Folly is and how solid the chemistry is between he and Simone. But while these characters aren’t hateful, it’s still an uphill battle to really root for them and I never quite get there. It’s pretty faint praise to say that I didn’t wholly hate these characters.

The depiction of French culture in To Each Her Own was something I found rather depressing. The levels of casual intolerance in this film are higher than I expected. True to life or not, it’s not very funny and is a main reason I struggled with this film as a comedy. Simone’s father fainting and being hospitalized after Simone comes out isn’t funny to me, it’s upsetting. And that’s not a one-off event. To Each Her Own focuses on intolerance and while the movie makes the point that intolerance is bad, it’s still not a funny thing to see.

To Each Her Own tries to delve into cultural insights and discussions. Queer, Senegalese and Jewish identities are all touched on in the film. However, these explorations remain shallow. I don’t feel more enlightened on the identities I don’t belong to- Jewish or Senegalese and there was no discussion of the queer identity that I found to be insightful or interesting. Perhaps it’s because the movie is trying to remain lighthearted, but these efforts come off as shallow and are the least interesting part of the movie. There’s lots of WLW films that give an insightful look at a culture and the intersectionality of identities. To Each Her Own is not one of them.

To Each Her Own ends with Simone, Wali and Claire all riding off together into the sunset on a scooter, presumably to explore a polyamorous relationship. I have problems with this. My first problem is that there’s three of them on a scooter and none of them are wearing helmets. That’s very unsafe! My second problem is that while I champion poly narratives, this happy, poly ending wasn’t earned nor built up. For the entirety of the movie, Wali and Claire have been romantic rivals. Both have expressed jealousy and dislike over the other person. For the film to suddenly end with Simone picking both of them and both of them being fine with this comes out of nowhere and feels random. It feels like a cop out more than anything.

This polyamorous endgame relationship does make me want a sequel though. There is definitely a feature film’s worth of material of these already individually marginalized people now in an underrepresented relationship and having to navigate having an actually committed poly relationship after the seemingly snap judgment on their part to engage in such. Plus, that’s an even wackier premise so maybe that would be a movie that actually in being funny.

Like lots of Netflix films, To Each Her Own doesn’t seem to have grander ambitions than to waste 90 minutes of your time and have you not feel pissed off at the end of it. It’s a fairly average film. The pacing is good and it kept my interest but there’s nothing remarkable here. It should be funnier than it is. It should be more insightful than it is. As it stands, it’s just something to watch on a Sunday afternoon and forget about a few days later. It’s not incompetent by any means but there’s little good in To Each Her Own that warrants it a recommendation from me.

Overall rating: 5.5/10

Other WLW films in similar genres

Later in life sexuality explorations

• Puccini for Beginners
• A Perfect Ending
• The Sex Monster
• Producing Adults
• Disobedience
• Kissing Jessica Stein
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2010s 2018 country: france genre: comedy Julia Piaton language: french mixed review Myriam Aziza Sarah Stern to each her own

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To Each, Her Own movie review: Netflix's French romcom is a superficial take on sexuality, lacks heart

Despite all her noble efforts, Myriam Aziza’s French romantic comedy Les goûts et les couleurs (To Each, Her Own) is a superficial take on the subject of sexuality

Despite all her noble efforts, director Myriam Aziza’s latest French romantic comedy Les goûts et les couleurs ( To Each, Her Own ) is a rather superficial take on the subject of sexuality. And the reason behind this superficiality is that Aziza fails to transcend beyond the comic elements arising out of a young woman’s confusion around her own sexuality, not once diving deeper into the core of the problem – the more human side of the issue. The film can perhaps be best described as a set piece created only for the purpose of entertainment, with no perceptible motive of discussing a relevant and important issue. While there’s nothing wrong with a light-hearted take on a serious subject, but even as a comedy, the film struggles to evoke chuckles, barring maybe one scene towards the end. That it fails to do so is quite simply because of a poorly written script whose reach exceeds its grasp.

The protagonist of the film is a young bank employee named Simone Benloulou, working in Paris. Simone hails from an orthodox Jewish family, and her younger brother is openly gay. Her father has disowned his son for his sexuality, and this has posed a serious dilemma for Simone, who, as it turns out, is a closeted lesbian. Fearing that the news of not one, but two of their children being homosexuals would be too much for her parents to bear, she fails to come out, every time she wants to. Things get complicated when she proposes to her girlfriend Claire and she says yes. That very night, she meets a charming young Senegalese cook and in a drunken stupor, ends up sleeping with him.

The confusion does not stop there. Simone’s geeky elder brother has recently developed a dating site exclusively for Jews, and he hooks up his sister with a good-looking Jewish guy. Not interested in meeting this guy on a blind date, Simone sends a co-worker to meet the guy, asking her to introduce herself as Simone, and then to mess up the date, so that the matchmaking stops right there. To add to her woes, this co-worker ends up falling for the date, and refuses to reveal that she is not Simone – thus embarking upon a dangerously deceptive relationship with the unsuspecting man. Meanwhile, the Senegalese cook tells Simone that he wants to open a restaurant in partnership with her, and exhausted with her life as a banker, Simone finds herself accepting his proposal and helping him set the business up. Amidst all this, her girlfriend Claire finds out about her relationship with the cook, and all hell breaks loose.

It’s an overly complicated plot, unnecessarily extended without dwelling on the core issues at play. While there are some cleverly crafted sequences – for instance the one where Simone’s date comes home to meet her parents and is shocked to learn that he has been with someone else all this while – but none of these sequences have what was most required in a film of this nature – a heart. None of the scenes are tender, they do not stand out and more often than not, they fail to evoke any emotion whatsoever – which is a shame, because the film had great potential. The resolution of the film’s central crisis is downright illogical and senseless, and it seemed like the makers had finally run out of ideas and were forced to finish it off in a hurry.

There are some good performances in the film, but sadly, none of them pass muster and are all dragged down by a weak and convoluted script. Sarah Stern plays Simone, and the confusion of her protagonist rubs off onto her, because she seems to sleepwalk through most of the film like Lady Macbeth – wracked in guilt, and not knowing what to do, or what she wants. Julia Piaton is good as the more matured and sensible Claire, and she plays her part quite well. Jean Christophe Folly plays Simone’s male love interest, and is clearly the best actor in the entire film. And Arie Elmaleh does a fascinating job of playing Simone’s irritating and nosy elder brother David, who has clearly taken after the family’s matriarch. These are all interesting characters. Thrown together in the cauldron, however, these individual performances fail to hold together, because there’s not enough spice to bind them into a fine dish.

What the film can boast of, though, is fine editing and some brilliant camerawork. But in the absence of a believable story, they have very little to do. If only the film had tried to do less and tell a good story, it would have worked. Myriam Aziza’s film is a wasted opportunity. She would perhaps do well to remember that in cinema, the end does not justify the means, and that every little detail counts.

To Each, Her Own is currently streaming on Netflix.

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French rom-com ‘To Each, Her Own’ has too many good ideas

The netflix indie bites off more than it can chew..

Eddie Strait

Posted on Jun 25, 2018     Updated on May 21, 2021, 12:43 pm CDT

Some movies are so thoroughly mediocre that you just want to yell at them to be better. That is the case with the French romantic comedy  To Each, Her Own . The story is bursting with ideas, so many ideas, in fact, that it could’ve been something great. Instead,  To Each, Her Own , much like its protagonist, wants it all. By trying to speak to so many ideas, the movie ends up saying very little. The ambition of director Myriam Aziza (who also co-wrote the script with Denyse Rodriguez-Tome) is admirable. However, her Netflix film badly needs someone who can rein in the unwieldy script.

To Each, Her Own  follows the story of Simone, played by Sarah Stern. She’s in a long-term relationship with Claire (Julia Piaton), but Simone has still not come out to her family. Her parents want Simone to settle down and start cranking out babies because they’re one-dimensional clichés. They’re also Jewish, but Simone isn’t practicing. Simone also strikes up a romance with Wali (Jean-Christophe Folly), a Senegalese man who is a chef. The two plan to open a restaurant until they hook up and complicate things. With a runtime under 95 minutes,  To Each, Her Own  bites off more than it can chew. And I haven’t even mentioned the farcical subplot where Simone sends a friend to take her place on a blind date.

The movie moves at a breathless pace and it comes at the expense of the characters.

To Each, Her Own  is at its best when it lets Simone have a quiet moment. In these instances, Stern’s face registers the confusion, anger, and sadness that Simone is experiencing. It feels real where so much of the movie feels contrived. It’s akin to watching someone who can’t juggle continuously add balls. Normally, I’m a major advocate for shorter movies. But this story needs either half of its storylines cut or it needs to be at least 30 minutes longer. The movie touches on race, religion, relationships, modern lifestyles versus traditional values, and I wish they received more than a cursory glance. It’s hard to be insightful when you barely scratch the surface.

Still not sure what to watch on Netflix? Here are our guides for the absolute best movies on Netflix , must-see Netflix original series and movies , and the comedy specials guaranteed to make you laugh.

*First Published: Jun 25, 2018, 10:20 am CDT

Eddie Strait is a member of the Austin Film Critic Association. His reviews focus primarily on streaming entertainment, with an emphasis on Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, and other on-demand services.

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To Each Her Own

Details: 2008, Rest of the world, 109 mins

Direction: Heather Tobin

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Identifiable characters, sincere writing, directing, and acting, and realistic story elements make To Each Her Own a refreshing pleasure against the ever more pervasive Hollywood world of lesbian chic. Canadian filmmaker Heather Tobin’s narrative feature debut is a remarkable look into the complexity of sexuality, emotion and desire. - Jessica Wilkie 2008 16th Rochester NY Gay & Lesbian Film Festival

Director Heather Tobin went all in when she quit her job in order to make this sweet, well-acted coming out romance and she hit the jackpot. Jess married the boy next door at a very young age and always did as expected, until she turns her world upside down. An undeniable physical chemistry between the two women lends weight and authenticity to this timeless tale of daring to be true to yourself. Tobin’s hard work is the secret behind it. It took her more than 200 auditions to find the perfect actresses. Perfect indeed. - Copenhagen Gay & Lesbian Film Festival 2009

This assured debut by talented all-rounder Heather Tobin (she scripted, produced, shot and edited the film) is the coming out tale of young married Jess and the emotional roller-coaster she finds herself on when she meets and instantly falls for out and proud lesbian Casey. Growing up with a mother that believes homosexuality is a sin it’s no wonder Jess buried her true feelings and married her high school sweetheart fresh after graduation. Yet she’s unable to keep away from the charming Casey and the two young women embark on an affair, discovering what it means to truly love someone. But will love be enough for Jess to tell the truth and come out? An award-winning film at numerous festivals this low-budget gem marks Tobin out as a director to watch. - Emma Smart BFI 23rd London Lesbian & Gay Film Festival 2009

A film about falling into your own skin, changing your ways and venturing into risky territory, at its core, To Each Her Own is a sweet and sincere film about desire, love, courage and trust. - if istanbul 2010

Tobin’s debut feature is entertaining. Leading Ladies give captivating performances. The drama builds to an explosive, satisfying climax, but even so, there’s still no easy or obvious resolution. To Each Her Own carries several messages worth repeating voiced by Casey. Its guiding motto: “Where’s the fun if no risk?”

- Metro Weekly Washington DC 2009

This touching debut feature by up-and- coming director Heather Tobin packs a powerful punch in a heartfelt lesbian coming out story dealing with homophobia inside and out. Jess is married too soon and too young to Trevor, a loyal, overly supportive husband intent on starting a family. Casey, who claims to have been gay since she was in the womb, can’t seem to find Miss Right…until she‘s caught off-guard by Jess. When the two young women find themselves falling in love, Jess struggles to protect her reputation and understand her confusing feelings, which are further complicated by her happy marriage and her homophobic mother. Thinking she can hide her affair from Trevor and maintain stability with Casey, Jess risks losing the strongest romantic connection she’s ever known. With sharp writing and undeniable chemistry, the characters in TO EACH HER OWN bring real life to this touching and highly realistic drama that unfolds around them as they come to terms with their sexuality. - 13th Seattle Lesbian and Gay Film Festival 2008

This touching debut feature by up-and-coming director Heather Tobin packs a powerful punch in a heartfelt lesbian coming-out story dealing with homophobia inside and out. - 18th Verzaubert Film Festival 2009

The coming-out story, set in Barrie, about married Jess (Hannah Hogan) who falls in love with commitment-phobic dyke Casey, features a strong performance by Hogan. And husband Trevor (Shaughnessy Redden) is a well-written, sympathetic character instead of the predictable abuser usually seen driving women to lesbianism. Check out the knockout climactic scene at the extended-family dinner table. It signals a director (writer and editor) to watch. Nice to get a glimpse of Barrie’s queer community, too.  – Susan G. Cole Inside Out Toronto 2009 NOW MAGAZINE

This film reminds viewers of the beauty and rawness of a DIY production that embraces its aesthetics, and has the ability to recall for the audience the complicated and elated feelings of first love. - Santa Barbara Gay and Lesbian Film Festival 2009

A tender love story agains the backdrop of a battle of allegiances equals a satisfying film experience. - Outrageous Film Festival 2009

When it comes to movies, we’re used to seeing the lives of dykes unfold in places such as Toronto, New York and Los Angeles-big cities where gays are part of the fabric of the community. But what about a place like Barrie, Ontario? This is the setting for this lesbian drama starring Hannah Hogan as Jess, a married, twenty-five- year-old woman who has no idea she’s a raging dyke. Brought up in a conservative town and listening to her homophobic mom, Jess has buried her true self-that is, until she meets Casey. Jess, sneaking around behind clueless husband Trevor’s back, begins a steamy affair with Casey. Yet Jess can’t shake her internalized homophobia and shocking news puts quite a wrench in her coming-out plans. Emerging filmmaker Heather Tobin’s debut feature, sometimes raw and always compelling, brims with the angst of first love while tackling a concept that many dykes know all too well-the path of true love never follows a straight line. - Inside Out Toronto 2009

Reel Pride programmer Stephen Mintz reports that excitement has been high at some of the festival’s centerpiece offerings, including Thursday’s world premiere of “To Each Her Own”: The film was so well received (an actual lesbian film with genuine situations and an actual happy ending!), the stars from Toronto were swarmed all night long by autograph seekers (another fairly new first for Reel Pride). It’s been overwhelming for the two stars and director, but they should get used to it, as they’re signed to many more festivals to come. One person told me that he saw the film’s director, Heather Tobin, at the Landmark after the screening, and she seemed on top of the world. - Fresno Beehive 2008

They still exist: wonderfully old-fashioned films about the one true love. Jess and Casey meet, fall in love, and want to stay together forever. But there are obstacles to overcome: Casey is Shane jr., experienced in sex but not in relationships, Jess is married to her high school sweetheart Trevor and in the midst of family planning. Secretly they begin an affair, yet intimidated by her own homophobia. Jess cannot leave her husband. Casey fights for her even when a happy ending seems impossible. Tobin’s directorial debut is a coming-out-story with heart, showing the tough struggle for identity in an adverse world. - Hamburg International Lesbian & Gay Film Festival 2009

Two of the festival’s screenings this year will feature LGBT films in gay venues. On Nov 9, To Each Her Own is playing at Liquid. On Nov 13, the festival ups the ante even more with an event at Axis, featuring the film Pageant and an evening of drag. To Each Her Own is a twenty-something coming of age story. Closeted and married Jessica (Hannah Hogan) has her world turned upsidedown when she meets openly gay Casey. Director Heather Tobin’s film is heavy with the complexities of coming out but is a joyous, unabashed romance. Working in her na- tive Canada, Tobin is an up-and-coming filmmaker working on gay rights issues in both the narrative and documentary genres. - Outlook Weekly Nov 6 Vol 13 #18 “A Better Day For Gays” 2008

This assured debut by talented all-rounder Heather Tobin (she scripted, produced, shot and edited the film) is the coming out tale of young married Jess and the emotional roller coaster she finds herself on when she meets, and instantly falls for, out and proud lesbian Casey. - Filmhouse Magazine UK 2009

An award-winning film at numerous festivals this low-budget gem marks Tobin out as a director to watch. - Glaysgay Scotland 2009

This independent debut by a talented Canadian filmmaker Heather Tobin is an exceptionally convincing and encouraging film about the ups and downs of coming-out. - Filmovy Festival inakosti 2009

To Each Her Own is an ambitious story of growing up, produced on a shoestring budget. - Espoo Cine 2009

Jess may look like any other beautiful girl, but her life is that of a woman, already married and settled at 25. Her husband Trevor, sweet but utterly clueless, is plotting the course of their lives (including children) with no eye for his wife’s apathy and detachment. Jess’s life is trudging on without her even having a hand in it. Casey, on the other hand, finds nothing worth committing to. She mindlessly plows away as a landscaper by day, and an array of indiscriminate women by night. But a quick Romeo & Juliet-style balcony exchange ignites a fire in both, and the first date turns into love before either woman knows what hit her. Though they fit together seamlessly, a weak-willed Jess struggles to come to grips with her new love, and the lifestyle change that comes with it. Stifling memories power Jess’s reluctance, the lifelong judgments of her homophobic mother driving the wedge that threatens the relationship. Jess’s tale is a common one, but in To Each Her Own, that isn’t a flaw: The film simply plays out like the story of someone you know. The tender and very sexy bedroom scenes feel like the first time. You can sense how it just fits for Jess, as she experiences that utterly relatable moment when a first love brings out a part of you that no one else has touched. To Each Her Own may be another coming out story, but it’s a damn good one. - ALEXIS WHITHAM FRAMELINE 33 2008

Casey, a cute young lesbian who can’t hold down a long-term relationship, is just killing time with her job as a groundskeeper. Her friends criticize her promiscuous ways and even her enlightened mother teases her about sleeping with a new girl each night. Jessica is a married woman with a budding career and a caring but clueless husband, who is more concerned with impregnating her than paying attention to her needs. On the face of things, her life is proceeding as planned, but dissatisfied Jess starts to have trouble denying her affinity for women. When Jess and Casey meet, their instant connection and the overwhelming passion they develop for one another forces them to deal with the personal problems they have each been refusing to face. - Reeling Chicago 2008

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How Lesbians Found One Another, From the Softball Field to the Sex-Toy Shop

In “A Place of Our Own,” June Thomas considers “six spaces that shaped queer women’s culture.”

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By Anne Hull

Anne Hull is the author of “Through the Groves: A Memoir.”

A PLACE OF OUR OWN: Six Spaces That Shaped Queer Women’s Culture, by June Thomas

June Thomas’s ability to resurrect the past in “A Place of Our Own: Six Spaces That Shaped Queer Women’s Culture” is a testament to her meticulous research. But it’s her voice — charming, irreverent, tender — that makes the journey through lesbian history so worthwhile.

The book starts in the lesbian bars of the 1960s, and travels on to feminist bookstores, rural separatist communities, women’s sex-toy shops, vacation destinations and, yes, the softball field. (A longtime Slate editor and podcaster born in England, Thomas confesses to this last phenomenon as a gap in her “sapphic scholarship.”)

Thomas doesn’t tap gently on the glass at these spaces; she flings herself in, starting (metaphorically) in their basements and working up. She scours accounting records, tax receipts and lawsuits going back decades. She reviews the minutes of softball league meetings. She tracks down the women who helped create places that transcended to spaces .

None of these pioneers were in it for the money. They drained their savings and dodged creditors. Purists scoffed at the merch for sale in feminist bookstores, but the refrigerator magnets and Lavender Menace pins kept the lights on. Lesbian bars had the misfortune of a customer base that drank a fraction of what men drank in gay bars, so they had to get creative, like serving a complimentary buffet lunch or sponsoring teams in sports leagues. Go Tower Lounge Hotspots!

Why are queer people so tribal in their need for gathering places? “Unlike other minority groups,” Thomas suggests, “where parents teach their children about family history, religious traditions and systemic prejudice, our birth families are generally ignorant of queer codes and culture. We have to work out their rules, rituals and rich history for ourselves.”

In her chapter on the lesbian land movement of the ’70s and ’80s, Thomas writes about the idealism that pushed women to sleep in a frozen shack in Oregon, and what it took to survive. “We were creating a new women’s culture, living our dreams and visions, and pushing ourselves to our limits,” one says.

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