hilarious best man speech examples

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The Most Hilarious Best Mans Speech Jokes

Author: Hollie Bond

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Best Man Speech Opening Jokes

Jokes about the newlyweds, self-deprecating best man jokes, jokes to end the best man's speech.

Feeling the pressure to deliver a best man’s speech that will make every guest in the room laugh? Keep guests young and old entertained for the whole speech with these funny best man’s speech jokes.

It’s such an honour to be asked to be a best man and this VIP role comes with many fun and important tasks (if you’re not sure what they are check out our guide to being a brilliant best man here). One of the tasks many best men dread though is writing and delivering the best man speech on the wedding day. Unless you’re a natural public speaker or have spent time on stage, it can be a pretty daunting prospect, especially when you consider that the best man speech is traditionally known to be the funniest and most looked forward to of all the speeches.

The good news is, you’re not alone and thousands of other best men before you have sat and stared at a blank piece of paper for hours before finally getting the inspiration to write an awesome best man speech.

We’ve got a comprehensive guide on how to write a brilliant groom’s speech here to help you with the structure, format, and length. But, once you have the general gist and bare bones of the best man speech jotted down, it’s time to insert some funny jokes into each section, to keep all the guests chuckling with laughter from start to finish.

Remember you’re not expected to be a professional stand-up comedian, Michael McIntyre style, and a wedding is often an emotional day, so it’s absolutely fine to make jokes that are unique to the couple or situation and also to include a heartfelt sentiment or two in between all the gags. To help you on your way to going down in history as the best best man ever, we’ve rounded up some of the greatest tried-and-tested best man speech jokes and one-liners that’ll easily fit into most wedding speeches. Feel free to tailor them to fit the newlyweds you’re talking about. Good luck!

What shouldn’t the best man joke about?

When it comes to writing your best man speech, there are certain topics that are strictly off-limits. It’s important to spend time thinking about things that will come across badly or offend any guests and really consider every sentence carefully before it makes the final edit.

Mentioning the groom’s ex-girlfriends or a previous wife is a definite no-go, as is talking about the groom’s sex life in any way. So that means no mention of the impending wedding night too. Anecdotes about the groom can be best man speech gold, but you need to get to the punch line within a few sentences otherwise you’ll lose the audience and always make sure any anecdotes will amuse all types of guests.

The best man should always avoid joking about the bride too. Unless you’re really good mates with her and know her well enough to have a giggle with her, then it’s best to just say something heartfelt and lovely about her.

Jokes containing swear words should also be avoided. While the younger generation of guests might not flinch when you swear, older members of the audience could be extremely offended. Finally, it’s best to steer clear of making a joke about how long it took for the groom to propose if that was the case. Not only does it make the bride look like all she wanted was a ring on her finge, it also might be an area of contention between the couple so won’t come across as funny to them.

And remember, you’re not the next Al Murray or Michael McIntyre so you don’t need to pepper your speech with one-liners worthy of a stand-up routine. Only joke about things that are genuinely amusing and specific to the groom at the wedding you’re attending rather than anything too generic that you’ve found on the internet.

Starting the best man’s speech is the most difficult part. Once you’ve said a few words, shaken off those nerves, and realised the crowd isn’t full of people about to throw tomatoes at you, you’ll get into your stride, but those first few sentences can be pretty scary.

The trick is to get the audience on your side from the off with a short and easy-to-understand joke that sets the tone for the speech to follow. Here are some great opener ideas for best man speeches.

1) If there’s anybody here today who’s feeling nervous, apprehensive and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead, it’s probably because you’ve just married [NAME OF THE GROOM].

2) Good evening. I’m so happy to preside over the only five minutes that the bride didn’t plan. Of course, I’m only joking. She went over the speech with me half an hour ago in the bar.

3) Everyone here who knows Sophie will know that she is a wonderful and kind person, who deserves a good husband. Thank god Theo married her before she found one.

4) We’ve now reached the point in the proceedings when we all get to see the Groom shift uncomfortably in his seat and grip the tablecloth in nervous anticipation. That’s right, I’ve been asked to give him the drinks bill.

5) It’s been an emotional day, even the cake is in tiers.

6) I just heard there was a competitive sweepstake on the length of the Best Man’s speech. I put my money on 45 minutes, so settle in…

7) My name is James and I am the Best Man. Many of you would beg to differ, but you’d do well to keep quiet – I know your secrets.

8) I’d like to congratulate the Groom on a truly magnificent speech. I always knew it would be hard to follow and I was right – I could hardly follow a word of it.

9) Being asked to be someone’s best man is like being called up for jury duty. You don’t really want to do it, but know you have to. You’re made to dress in a suit and pretend to be an upstanding member of the community. The only difference is I didn’t have a say if the life sentence passed earlier today.

10) I did ask for a microphone but was told one wasn’t available. So if you can’t hear me at the back, the silence from the people at the front should reassure you that you’re not missing out on anything.

11) I’ve been told I can’t get away with a few thank yous and a quick toast in this speech. Apparently, as Best Man, I’m supposed to sing the Groom’s praises and talk about his good qualities. Unfortunately, I can’t sing and I won’t lie.

12) Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Before I came here today one of my good friends gave me some advice on giving this speech. He said think of it like walking through a nudist camp, it’s only hard for the first minute.

13) You’ve got no idea how much I’ve been looking forward to today. After all the time I’ve been friends with the Groom, he has at long last admitted that I am in fact the best man.

14) Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Before I begin, I just want to apologise for not being an experienced public speaker. I’m probably going to spend most of the time looking at this piece of paper in my hands. Oh, it’s not my notes – it’s a picture of the triple vodka I’m going to down as soon as this is over.

15) Firstly I’d like to say I’m very nervous about making this speech. In fact this must be the third time today that I’ve stood up from a warm seat with pieces of paper in my hand.

16) I don’t believe in roasting the groom on his special day. Therefore this speech won’t contain anything embarrassing or controversial about Matt. Instead I’ll refer only to the kind, funny side of his character. Thank you and goodnight.

17) It’s strange to be giving a speech like this one, because my parents always told me that if I had nothing good to say about someone, I should just be quiet.

18) Loyal, caring, sincere, honest, a great man… but that’s enough about me, I’m here to give a speech about Arthur!

19) For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Sam and for those of those who do know me…I apologise. My full name is actually ‘Sam-would-you-like-a-drink’. For those of you who I chat to in the bar later, I’d appreciate it if you could use my full name.

20) Please keep clapping and cheering to a minimum. I’m terribly hungover. I know, you shouldn’t drink the night before a wedding, but I couldn’t very well let the groom drink alone, could I?

21) Now, before I start, the venue manger has asked me to request that, for reasons of health and safety, none of you get up on top of the chairs and tables during my standing ovation.

22) I have no problem admitting to you all that I’m extremely nervous right now. And, as the people sitting near the front of the room can attest, it is actually possible to smell fear.

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Once you’ve opened the best man’s speech and given the guests an idea of the tone and also helped them relax, knowing that you’re not about to deliver a complete car crash of a speech, it’s time to get personal.

Remember, the best man’s speech is mostly intended as an ode to the groom and your friendship and to give the guests an idea of what the main man at the wedding is really like behind closed doors!

You can also include some jokes about the bride (or another groom at a same-sex wedding), although keep these minimal as the father of the bride will have spent a large part of his speech talking about his daughter. As well as these tried-and-tested quips, try to include a few jokes that are specific and personal to your friend, to ensure the groom and his guests feel like you do actually know and love him!

23) So where do I start about Ben? Well, for starters he’s handsome, witty, intelligent, he’s charm…sorry… Ben, I’m having trouble reading you handwriting. You can tell me the rest later.

24) The bride and groom have asked that I don’t talk about Mike’s mishaps, mistakes, embarrassing moments or ex-girlfriends. So thanks for listening everyone, that’s it from me!

25) I do have to say though Rowan just how lucky you are. You will leave here today with a wife who is warm, loving and caring. And Margot, how lucky you are as well. You leave here today having gained a lovely dress and a wonderful bouquet of flowers.

26) Helen please put your left hand flat on the table. Paul please place your hand on top of hers. Enjoy this moment Paul because it’s the first and last time in your marriage that you’ll have the upper hand.

27) We all know the bride is a wonderful lady who deserves the perfect guy. Too bad you don’t always get what you deserve.

28) Well, I do hope that Meghan and Harry enjoy their honeymoon in Wales. I assume that’s where they’re going anyway… When I asked Harry what he was doing after the wedding, he said he was going to Bangor for a fortnight.

29) I’ve been instructed by the bride and groom to keep this speech smut-free, so if I come across any innuendo, I’ll whip it out immediately.

30) Harry is the kindest friend anyone could ask for; a man whose philanthropy knows no bounds. ‘Generosity’ should be his middle name. He would do anything for me; like helping write a section of the best man speech because I forgot about it until late last night at the bar!

30) Seeing the happy couple walking down the aisle earlier today, I’m sure we all agree that the bride looked simply stunning. The groom, on the other hand, simply looked stunned.

31) I’ll try to keep my speech short, because every extra minute I speak is an extra minute’s delay in witnessing how the Groom’s dance lessons worked out.

If the groom is known to be a bit of a tech geek or a gamer…

32) Now he’s getting a bit older he’s turning his attention more and more to gadgets, constantly buying stuff online. I swear he didn’t have an interest in women until I told him the secret to women was knowing what buttons to press.

33) Being asked to be the best man is about five minutes of glowing pride, followed by an eternity of panic and misery. Jane, I expect you had a similar experience when David asked you to be his wife.

34) Someone once said that marriage is a 50/50 partnership, but anyone who believes that clearly knows nothing about women or fractions!

35) When I saw Kate heading up the aisle with her father, I thought “At last she’s seen sense, and got herself a man with looks and money.”

36) Before proposing, William went to ask Kate’s father for her hand in marriage. He said that it was fine by him, providing William took the hand that had spent 25 years fishing into his wallet.

37) I’ve been asked by many how I’m going to cope with my best friend being married and spending all of his time loved up at home. I’m thrilled! I’ll finally be able to talk to women without him cramping my style.

It’s a classic and winning tool in British humour – the self-deprecating joke, where you take the mick out of yourself in order to make the crowd both laugh and also get them on your side straight away. Here are some of the best ways to put yourself down in hilarious fashion.

38) I would like to start by saying what a pleasure it is to be Best Man at Charles and Camilla’s wedding. Charles made me compete for this honour today, but I was able to beat the barman over there in rock-paper-scissors, so here I am!

39) The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.

40) I’ve been worried about giving this speech for a while now. Fortunately last night I slept like a baby. Waking up every two hours and bawling my eyes out.

You’ll probably want to end the speech on more of a heartfelt note or with some sort of thanks and advice for the newlyweds, but there’s always time to get a couple of more jokes in at the groom’s expense beforehand…

41) Ryan was telling me that the amazing meal this evening was charged on a cost-per-head basis, so, on the bride and groom’s behalf, I’d like to thank the following people for not coming…

42) I’ve just got some last messages here to read out: one from Greg’s football team to Jacqui: “Apologies we couldn’t all be there today, good luck with Greg, we found him to be useless in most positions, but wishing you all the best for tonight.”

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Hollie Bond

Hollie is a lifestyle journalist with over ten years’ experience working in the wedding industry as Lifestyle Editor for You & Your Wedding magazine Also a Regional Editor for Muddy Stilettos, Hollie has written for Square Meal magazine, Family History Monthly, BBC History magazine and Homes & Antiques. In her spare time you can find Hollie in a dance studio practising ballet…

Learn more about Hollie Bond

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The Plunge

The 50 Best Jokes For Your Best Man Speech

The 50 Best Jokes For Your Best Man Speech

As the best man, you’re tasked with giving the toast—maybe the most famous one of the evening. For the big speech, it’s important to have some jokes scattered throughout. The couple gets to be sentimental. Her father gets to be sad and nostalgic. You need to bring the funny like it’s showtime at the Apollo. That’s no easy task, either. Luckily, there are dozens of jokes that have already been written that you can plug your buddy’s name into and carry on. We compiled some of our favorites for you here. Good luck!

The Openers

Good evening everyone. I’m so happy to preside over the only five minutes that the bride didn’t plan. Of course, I’m only kidding. We went over the speech 40 minutes ago in the hall.

It’s been an emotional day, even the cake is in tiers.

We’ve reached the moment in the evening where we get to watch the groom figet and worry in anticipation. Yes, everyone, I’ve been asked by the staff to give him the bill.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Before I begin, I just want to apologize for not being an experienced public speaker. I’m probably going to spend most of the time looking at this piece of paper in my hands. Oh, it’s not my notes – it’s a picture of the triple Jameson I’m going to down as soon as this is over.

I just heard there was a lucrative pool on the length of the Best Man’s speech. I put my money on 40 minutes, so settle in…

Before I begin my speech, there’s just one order of business I’ve been asked to take care of. *Hold up pair of trousers with padlock on them* These are Jack’s Chastity Pants. I know he’s given keys out to various ladies over the years, but since he is now a married man, he’d like to get those copies back, so Jill is the only one with access. *Wait for the keys you strategically handed out to wedding guests to be brought up*

My name is Peter and I am the Best Man. Many of you would beg to differ, but shut up – I know your secrets.

Just a couple of rules before we begin. If you have a mobile phone – leave it switched on, entertain yourselves. And if anyone texts you any good jokes, kindly pass them up to the front.”

I’ve been told I won’t get away with a few thank yous and a quick toast. Apparently, as Best Man, I’m supposed to sing the Groom’s praises and talk about his good qualities. Unfortunately, I can’t sing and I won’t lie.

My speech today will be like a mini-skirt.  Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!

Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen – Before I came here today one of my good friends gave me some advice on giving this speech. He said think of it like walking through a nudist camp, it’s only hard for the first minute.

Jokes About The Groom

Now he’s getting a bit older he’s turning his attention more and more to gadgets, constantly buying stuff from ebay, amazon and I want one of those dot com. I swear he didn’t have an interest in women until he overheard someone say the secret to women was knowing what buttons to press.

I read somewhere the perfect best man speech should last as long as it takes for the groom to make love. So ladies and gentlemen, please raise a glass to the happy couple!

Sally is a bright, charming, wonderful woman, who deserves a good husband. It’s such a shame Harry swooped in before she could find one.

I think the main reason we’ve lasted as friends all these years is because you’re geographically convenient…and you had a trampoline.

Jack is the kindest friend anyone could ask for; a man whose philanthropy knows no bounds. ‘Generosity’ should be his middle name. He would do anything for me; like helping write a section of the best man speech because you forgot about it until late last night at the bar!

Jack was in a pub when he proposed. No, really, it was actually very romantic – he got up on one knee.

It’s strange to be giving a speech like this one, because my parents always told me that if I had nothing good to say about someone, I should just be quiet.

Seeing the happy couple walking down the aisle earlier today, I’m sure we all agree that the bride looked simply stunning. The groom, on the other hand, simply looked stunned.

So I’m the best man, although I think I was picked by default since the groom doesn’t really have any other friends.

I can only say in my defense that Mike and I share a common sense of humor so if this speech is in anyway unfunny please “Feel Free to Blame Mike.”

I’d also like to congratulate Keith on a truly magnificent speech, I always knew it would be hard to follow, and I was right, I could hardly follow a word of it.

John did tell me that the vicar was firmly against sex before marriage. However, Jane did assure him it would only take a couple of minutes.

Rest assured though, unlike most traditional best man speeches, which are full of sexual innuendo, I’ve promised Dan and Anne that if there is anything slightly risqué, I’ll whip it out immediately …”

Although Ria did actually tell me Paul has always brightened up her life. Well, she actually said he never turned the lights off but it amounts to the same thing pretty much.

I’ll try to keep my speech short, because every extra minute I speak is an extra minute’s delay in witnessing how the Groom’s dance lessons worked out.

Jokes About The Bride

I do have to say though how lucky you are Dave, you’re leaving with a beautiful wife whom you love. And you, Miranda, you get to go home with such a nice new dress and beautiful bouquet of flowers, it’s great.

Jill, you are an amazing woman who deserves a wonderful husband. And I promise you I won’t rest until I get to the bottom of what’s gone wrong here.

Being asked to be the best man is about five minutes of glowing pride, followed by an eternity of panic and misery. Linda, I expect you had a similar experience when Paul asked you to be his wife.

I spoke to both Sally and Paul before the Wedding and I asked Paul what he was looking for in Marriage – he said “Love, happiness and a long life together.” When I asked Sally the same question – she replied – A coffee percolator!

Speaking of Jane, I would like to say how beautiful she looks today in that fantastic dress …Dan likes it too, as he told me in the church it will blend in just nicely well with the rest of the kitchen.

Someone once said that marriage is a 50/50 partnership, but anyone who believes that clearly knows nothing about women or fractions!”

When I saw Linda heading up the aisle with her father, I thought “At last she’s seen sense, and got herself a man with looks and money.”

Before proposing, Paul went to ask Linda’s father for her hand in marriage. He said that it was fine by him, providing Paul took the hand that had spent 20 years fishing into his wallet!

I recognize my place here; being best man at a wedding is like being the dead body at a funeral. You’re expected to be there, but if you say too much people start freaking out.

If you can’t hear me in the back, let the silence in the front assure you that you’re not really missing out on anything.

A Best Man is like a dog. You love him, care about him, and he’s only thrown up and ruined your upholstery twice.

I would like to start by saying what a pleasure it is to be Best Man at Jack and Jill’s wedding. Jack made me compete for this honor today, but I was able to beat Mark the Bartender over there in rock-paper-scissors, so here I am!

I found the speech length really difficult to settle on. At one point, it ran to almost 70 minutes, so I cut it down to a five-minute speech but I just felt like too many important things were being left out. So I came to a compromise – I’m going to read the five-minute speech. Then straight afterwards, I’ll do 70-minute one and you guys can tell me which speech I should use.

What can you say about a man who came from humble beginnings and is now rising to the top of his industry based solely on his intelligence, grit and willpower? A man whose charisma knows no bounds and who has already distinguished himself amongst his peers? Because I’m trying to write my Tinder profile and I’m having trouble summarizing myself.

When I sat down to write this speech I Googled “perfect best man speech”, but you had to pay to read the examples and I didn’t think it was worth it, so I’m gonna wing it.

I admit, I’m extremely nervous right now. As the people sitting near to me at the table can testify, it really is possible to smell fear.”

I must admit, I’m not used to speaking in public. Until now I thought a toastmaster was a kitchen appliance.

The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.

You know, it’s been said that being asked to be best man is like being asked to make love to Camilla Parker Bowles.. It’s a great honor but you don’t really want to do it!

I’ve been anxious about giving this speech for a while now. Fortunately last night I slept like a baby. Waking up every two hours and bawling my eyes out. Ten minutes ago, I had to ask a complete stranger to burp me.

Dave was telling me that the amazing meal this evening was charged on a cost-per-head basis, so, on the bride and groom’s behalf, I’d like to thank the following people for not coming…

What’s the difference between in-laws and out-laws? Outlaws are wanted.”

Leading up to today John and Jane were having an issue with the seating plan. Who would sit comfortably in here & who would have to get up and stand during the speeches so we decided to use wedding present list, biggest presents at front and work it back from there. So hopefully you can hear me at the back when I say on behalf of Jane and John thank‐you very much for the teaspoons.

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Best Man Speech: The Ultimate Guide (5 Examples & FAQs)

  • Magical Words

The Ultimate Best Man Speech Guide (Examples And Templates Included)

  • Posted by by Lisa Plaitt

Being picked to be the best man is such a great honor. You will feel blessed that the groom has thought of you, and considers you the best man and friend for the job.

But, as the wedding draws nearer, there’s one thing on your mind. No, it’s not the bachelor party… It’s the best man’s speech(see also: Best Ways to End Your Best Man’s Speech ). 

As the best man, you will likely have many responsibilities in the run up towards the wedding. You’ll have to try on suits, organize the bachelor party, but the best man speech is the thing that most look forward to, or dread!

Standing up in front of many guests, some of which you may not have met before can be nerve wracking to say the least. It’s such an important task, and a part of the wedding that many guests look forward to. 

A best man speech needs to hook the audience in, reveal some funny stories about the groom, and even the bride, but also wish the couple well, and spread some laughter amongst the audience.

But, you have to do all of this in one single speech that can’t be too long, and can’t be too short! 

So, how can you nail the best man speech? Well, that’s where we come in handy. We can offer you this ultimate guide to creating a best man speech, including tips, structure and examples you can take inspiration from. 

How To Structure A Best Man Speech

Not everyone is gifted with the ability to speak clearly and confidently to a crowd. It can be very nerve racking, and make you anxious to say the least.

If you’re unsure of how to go about planning your best man speech, then we can help you out with this simple structure to follow and keep yourself on track. 

This structure is a sort of guide, you don’t have to use it, but it’s a good idea to follow the structure so you cover all bases when doing the speech.

It can also help you when actually performing the speech, as you’ll know what needs to come next and in which order to go over your stories and anecdotes.

A good best man speech begins with:

  • An Introduction

Use the introduction to introduce yourself to the crowd. Not everyone will know who you are in the wedding, so it’s a nice way to break the ice and get rid of any awkwardness.

Try introducing yourself with a funny one liner about who you are and how you know the happy couple.

  • Talk About How You Met/Know The Groom

Next, it’s a good idea to briefly cover how you met the groom, or how long you’ve known each other. You can give a little history of how far back you go, and mention how honored you are to be the best man. 

  • Anecdotes About The Groom

Here comes the fun part! Now is the time to start telling a funny story about the groom. The emphasis here is on funny and not too embarrassing or gross. Choose two or three short anecdotes or stories, but don’t overdo it. 

  • Balance Poking Fun With Sincerity

After you’ve had your fun, balance this out by saying something meaningful and sincere about the groom, his qualities or your friendship. 

  • Briefly Talk About How You Know The Bride

In this section, you can talk about your first meeting with the bride, how she came into the groom’s life, and how great of a match you believe them to be. 

  • Wish Them All The Best

Finally, wish the couple all the best for their future together with a sincere, caring comment. Then, toast to the happy couple! 

Best Man Speech Do’s And Don’ts

Best Man Speech Do’s And Don’ts

There are definitely a few do’s and don’ts when it comes to speaking at someone’s wedding. You’ll want to keep it concise, funny, but not too over the top jokey. Here’s our recommendations of what to do, and what not to do. 

First things first, you’ll want to plan ahead, and write a few stories and anecdotes down that you can remember. Do this for a few weeks before the wedding, so it gives you time to come up with the right memories to share. 

Try brainstorming ideas with other members of the family or bridal party to come up with the best things to share about the groom and his bride. Then, you can narrow down the list and find the most impactful or most important things to talk about.

You should also consider who this speech is going to be said around.

If the groom’s very traditional great aunt or grandma is there, it could be a good idea to avoid any crass, rude stories that could make family members uncomfortable. Save those lines for the bachelor party! 

Do pause for reactions. You don’t want to talk too fast or fly through the speech as those who have laughed at the last line may miss the next one. Always leave small gaps or pauses for reactions, applause or responses. 

Finally, make sure you focus on the couple, not just the groom.

This day is about the two of them. While you are doing a speech because you are the best man to the groom, it is important that you bring in the bride/partner in your speech so that overall you are wishing both of them well on their new adventure. 

What Not To Do

Don’t wing it! You may have some liquid courage on the night, but you need this speech to be a crowd pleaser, so be sure to take your notes and go over the speech in your head just before you have to do it. 

Don’t use foul language, or inflammatory language. You don’t want to cause a dark cloud over the event by offending anyone or causing a scene.

The same goes for mentioning exes (who could well be at the wedding) or bringing up sore subjects during the speech. Keep it fun, lighthearted, and hilarious. 

Don’t use cliches like The groom is like a brother to me. Instead, demonstrate your close bond by telling a story or giving an example of when he treated you like family, and made you feel welcome.

This is far more impactful and will really get the audience involved in your speech. 

Finally, and this is an important one- don’t make it about you. This is not your shining moment, your time will come.

Ensure you’re not talking about yourself too much, and always bringing it back to the bride and groom, because that’s what the audience really wants to hear about.

It’s a chance for them to see the couple in a different light, from your perspective, not learn everything about you. 

Tips For Writing A Best Man Speech

Example Of Best Man Speeches

We’ve also got some brief tips for writing and performing your best man speech!

  • Practice before the actual speech
  • Don’t include inside jokes- they will fall on deaf ears
  • Keep it short and sweet – don’t go over the top with long stories/memories
  • Don’t use cringey cliches
  • Don’t mention exes- even as a joke
  • Use clean language
  • Don’t say anything political/inflammatory
  • Tell a story about the groom and the couple as a pair
  • Don’t just focus on the groom
  • Always end on a high – make a nice toast and comment about the couple

Qualities To Talk About In The Best Man Speech

Qualities To Talk About In The Best Man Speech

Throughout your speech, it is important to keep a running theme. If the joke you are telling is unrelated, it won’t have as much drive and impact.

For instance, if you’re talking about the groom’s thoughtfulness, use funny anecdotes that relate to this, and bring it back to that whenever possible.

Here are some other qualities that are worth mentioning:

  • Sense of humor: If the groom is known for his quick wit and humor, be sure to incorporate this into your speech. Share a funny story or two that showcases his sense of humor and make the guests laugh.
  • Generosity: If the groom is known for his kindness and generosity, talk about a specific instance where he went out of his way to help someone in need. This will show the guests the type of person he truly is.
  • Loyalty: Mention the groom’s unwavering loyalty to his friends and family. Talk about how he has been there for you and others in the past and how this trait is so important in a relationship.
  • Intelligence: If the groom is intelligent and knowledgeable, highlight this in your speech. Talk about his impressive achievements or interests that show his intelligence and passion.
  • Adventure: If the groom is someone who is always up for a new adventure, talk about his love for travel or exploring new things. This will show the guests his spontaneous and adventurous side.

For example, you could say:

Where do I begin with the groom’s sharp sense of humor? He’s a true master of wit, who can leave even the most experienced comedian in awe. A particularly memorable instance was when him and his bride went on a picnic; after he inadvertently dropped their sandwiches into a nearby pond, he remarked ‘Well, it looks like we’re having fish sandwiches today!’. The bride couldn’t help but laugh out loud at how quickly he turned an unfortunate situation into something humorous – that is simply the type of person this groom is. 

Groom has always had a very caring, loving nature. He would do anything for anyone. Except that one time I asked him to water my plants while I was on vacation. He brought all of the guys over to ‘water my plants’! Thanks for that, Groom. Just kidding, Groom is incredibly thoughtful and compassionate towards all who meet him, which is a quality I believe brought him closer to Bride. 

You want to talk about his great qualities, poke a little fun, or share a funny story, but then talk about how these qualities have translated into his relationship with his partner, or how they have brought them closer together. 

Best Man Speech Examples

Good evening everyone. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Tom, younger brother and best man of the groom. For those of you that do know me…heeeeeeey! 

I have known Jack for…X years now (your age) and have always looked up to him. He had it all, the career, the intelligence, the sense of humor, and now the girl. Then again, I got the good looks. 

In all seriousness, I have always looked up to my big brother. He’s always had a flair for sports, and genuinely has a heart of gold.

Being the youngest of the two of us, Jack has made me a better man, mainly because of the character building he put me through as a child. Jack would love taunting me by stealing my favorite stuffed animals. 

I cherished my favorite, Mr. Snuggles, until one day Jack told me to come downstairs and see the new toy that our Rottweiler had been given.

I was so excited to see our little furry boy happy and playing with his toy until I realized that Jack had offered up Mr. Snuggles in sacrifice with a huge grin on his face. It was a day I won’t forget. 

Despite the taunting and the terrorizing, Jack has been the man that I’ve always aspired to be. In all of the years I’ve been around Jack, he’s always been tenacious and worked hard for what he wants. And he’s always gotten it.

After asking Jenny out the first time, and she said no , he didn’t give up. He knew she was the one for him! It’s a good thing he has the patience of a saint, as it took another 3 attempts to get the first date! 

With Jack being the older, but not often the wiser brother, he managed to get himself into some mishaps in the past.

When he did finally get a chance to take Jenny out on a date, he turned up at the wrong house, and managed to slip and break his shoulder all in one fantastic, first meeting with the parents.

Smoooth, brother. At least he made it an unforgettable start to their journey together. 

With Jenny at his side, Jack’s clumsy mishaps are less and less. You truly bring out the best in him, Jen. I would say welcome to the family, but you’ve been a part of our lives for some time already, and I am truly blessed to be able to call you my new sister. 

From day one, you’ve fit right in, as you too have taken on the role of teasing Jack just as I wanted. Let me tell you guys, there have been many pranks that Jenny and I have pulled off on Jack.

One time, we hid all of his left shoes, until the confusion nearly drove him to madness…and he had to deliver his board meeting like some kind of two right footed lunatic. 

Other times, we’ve hidden around the house just when Jack is coming home from a long day at the office, to ambush him with Nerf guns until he pleads for mercy! Let’s just say justice has been served for Mr. Snuggles. 

I quickly realized that Jenny and Jack were cut from the same mold. You two are a real example of what it means to marry your best friend, and I can’t wait to see what the future holds for the two of you.

So everyone, if you could raise your glass…and toast- to the bride and groom! 

Show Emotion

Hi everyone! For those of you who don’t know me already, I am Zach, the best man of James! When James asked me to be the best man I felt like it was such an honor.

Then he reminded me that it’s not just about organizing the bachelor party and I have to actually come to the wedding so…here I am. 

I’ve known James for so many years now, having met him at high school. In those years, it’s become clear what a fantastic friend he is. He’s handsome, kind, brilliant, funny…and sorry (looks at Groom) mate I can’t read your handwriting here. I’ll just wing it. 

Just kidding. Me and James have been through thick and thin. I’ve watched him go from a weedy, awkward teenager to a less weedy, awkward adult!

Britney would probably argue with me over the adult part! James has always had that boyish sense of humor that’s often gotten us into trouble over the years. 

I remember James would always be the class clown in high school. But for some reason, it was always me getting in trouble. One day, I glanced over in class to see James scribbling away on his desk.

He’s probably carving out some obscenity in the wood I thought.

This is why it came as such a shock when later that day it was I who was called into the principal’s office, and as I walked with my head hung in shame to my fate, James smiled wide and proudly.

Little did I know it was my name he had carved into the wood, so I could sit in detention after class!   

Ever since that day, James and I have been at war with one another to get the other one back! But deep down, I know that James would do anything for me. If I needed someone at 4am, James is that friend.

Despite our differences, I know he’s as good as family to me, and all of the Henderson’s have welcomed me into their home on many occasions, and now Britney gets to have that same privilege. 

Britney brings out the absolute best in James, and has given us an incredible gift in bringing two wonderful boys into our lives. With Britney, James gets someone who is beautiful, smart, caring, and Britney…well, you get James. 

In all seriousness, if Britney gets half as much joy in being married to James, that I have had in being his friend over the years, then she will be incredibly lucky indeed. 

On behalf of all the groomsmen, bridesmaids and myself, I would like to thank James and Britney for having us be a part of their special day. I know how hard you’ve worked to make this a day to remember, and you’ve definitely succeeded. 

I wish you both all of the happiness, joy and good luck in the world, as you take these steps towards your future together. To the bride and groom, everyone! (Cheers). 

Hello everyone. My name is Joe and I’d just like to thank John for finally confirming that I am in fact – the best man, after 20 years of friendship. 20 years is a long time.

Just think, back then…Low rise jeans were in fashion, Spiderman was the favorite superhero, and Ben Affleck and J-Lo were together. So really, nothing has changed in 20 years, and the same goes for our friendship. 

If I ever needed building up, or bringing back down to earth, John was the man to do it. He’s always been there for me, through thick and thin. And let’s face it…during the college years, we were more thick than thin!

But, we had each other’s backs no matter what.

I remember one time in college, we decided that reading books and writing our own essays just wasn’t for us anymore. We decided to pay someone to write us an essay, and we would switch it up to pass the class.

From that day on a keen businessman was born- be careful everyone- you’ll probably get a bill for your food! 

It all would have gone swimmingly if John hadn’t forgotten to change the name on the essay, but he never took me down with him!

Since then, I’ve realized what a tenacious person, good friend and loyal individual John was, and it’s an absolute blessing to be up here with you tonight as your best man. 

There is one very important person who is not sitting on this top table with us today, and that is John’s mother, Cathy, who sadly passed away just last year.

I’ve joked a lot about John tonight, but I know that Cathy would be incredibly proud to see the man that you have become, and over the moon of how happy you are today with Mia.

So, if you wouldn’t mind joining me in raising a glass to John’s mom, who can’t be with us today, but is with us in spirit. Cheers. 

On behalf of the wedding party, I would just like to say a huge thank you to John and Mia, for including us in their special day.

It’s been a wonderful day so far, and all Mia’s hard work planning and prepping has truly paid off. John, you just sit there and look pretty. 

In addition, I’d like to thank both Mia’s parents, and John’s dad who have helped make this day extra special for the happy couple, which I’m sure they are eternally grateful for. 

I’d also like to say that the bridesmaids have done an incredible job helping Mia plan the perfect wedding, and for making sure that Mia looks every bit as beautiful as she does today.

They also had the difficult task of getting Mia to the church on time, which if you know Mia is a very big achievement, indeed. 

Finally, I’d like to thank the groomsmen for organizing and completing the best bachelor party Miami has ever seen. I only hope it was the send off John was hoping for before he begins the next stage of his life with Mia. (But I highly doubt it) 

John, I’ve loved being your best friend, and I thank you for bringing Mia into our lives. She’s a beautiful person, intelligent, and brings out the best in everyone she meets. Her only downfall is her taste in men! Just kidding. 

Seriously, I think everyone will join me in saying that we wish you only the best for your future together, and that we all can share one day in a love like yours. Cheers to the bride and groom! 

Ladies and Gentleman, I have an announcement to make. If there is anyone here tonight that is feeling nervous, apprehensive, or maybe even a little nauseous at what lies ahead…then it’s probably because you’ve just married Adam. 

For those of you who don’t know who I am, I am the best man, James. There are few words to describe Adam. Handsome, funny, but smart isn’t one of them. You see, Adam was my best man, at my wedding, and boy he did not hold back!

So, as we stand here today, know that my time has come for me to get you back!

Before I start the character assassination that is my best man’s speech, let me just thank Adam and Olivia for having us be a part of this very special day.

I know how much work has gone into making today as great as it has been, so thank you both for pulling it off! To be honest, I never thought Adam would find someone to marry, let alone someone as beautiful and amazing as Olivia!

I’ve known Adam for a very long time, all the way back to when he still had hair! We first met during our studies at X University. At first I thought we had nothing in common, but I quickly found out that we did. We would both likely fail our first year!

Our time at University was one of the best in my life, and I’ve far too many stories to tell you about our lovely Adam here. 

But, as the BEST man, I won’t do to him what he did to me. Instead, I’ll talk about his lovely qualities over the years. First up, is his beautiful singing voice. I can’t tell you how many times I heard the works of Marvin Gaye after he met Olivia.

We quickly banned singing in the shower at our dorm because of all the love songs he would belt out after going on a date with Olivia. To say he was smitten from the start is an understatement. 

And why wouldn’t he be? All those who know Olivia know what a lovely, and caring person she is. She deserves a good husband. Thank god Adam got there first before she could find one! 

Another defining quality that drew Olivia to Adam is his caring nature. We’re incredibly proud of Adam for working as an EMT and helping people every day.

I’ll never forget the time a few years back during a friendly soccer game where I slipped and fell over on my side, snapping and breaking my ankle.

Adam was at my side within SECONDS…to let me know he caught my fall on video. Emergency Medical Services *Scoff*. Only when he saw the angle of my ankle did his medical training kick in.

All jokes aside, Adam and Olivia have always been there for me, and I them. I’d like to think of them as family rather than friends, and can only hope that continues going forward.

Adam and Olivia…I’ve never met two people more perfect for one another. You are both kind, old souls, and you make each other incredibly happy. So, if you all could raise your glasses with me, and toast to this amazing couple…to the bride and groom!  

Example 5

Hello everyone. My name is Kane, and I am the best man, and longtime friend of Rob. I was, however, somewhat surprised to be asked to be the best man, as Rob has never been able to admit this over the years.

At first, I thought this was great. I get to plan a bachelor party for Rob, but then he reminds me I have to write a killer speech that would likely make everyone laugh. 

I had no idea where to start, so I decided to trawl the internet for inspiration. After a few hours, I found some really….really…great stuff. But then I remembered I needed to write a speech, so I got off YouTube. 

I asked friends and family for advice, and according to tradition, I am supposed to sing Rob’s praises and tell you all about his fantastic qualities. Well, sorry to tell you, but I can’t sing and I don’t lie. So that’s out of the window. 

But, Sophia told me I can’t say anything too rude or controversial about Rob. Instead, I can only say nice funny things, so with that in mind, thank you and goodnight all. 

Just kidding. Seriously, Rob is one of the most kind, funny, caring and compassionate people I have ever met. This is a quality that I think brought Sophia closer to him.

His willingness to do anything for anyone, without accepting anything in return is what makes Rob extra special, and a joy to be around. 

In turn, Sophia is one of the sweetest, and funnest ladies I have ever met! We’ve shared many great memories together, with my partner included, as Sophia and Rob are actually our children’s godparents. 

I’ve known Rob for years. We grew up only a few doors apart on our street. I thought there was no kid cooler than Rob. He had all of the best hot wheels, Pokemon cards, and I had a huge crush on his big sister, Natalie *winks at groom’s sister*.

Looking back, I was probably a big nuisance always wanting to go play over his house, but I had some of the best time of my life growing up with Rob by my side. We’ve been there for every big moment of each other’s lives.

Graduation, getting our first jobs, our first cars, and now I get to be here for the biggest day of his life, where he gets to marry the beautiful Sophia. 

Sophia and Rob, your love for each other shines through you. Sophia, I’m happy to step down as I can see that you two are truly best friends, and meant to be.

I can’t think of anyone better to look after my Rob here, and I know he will do everything he can to look after you for the rest of his days. 

Thank you both so much for a fantastic day. If the rest of your lives is half as good as today has been, then you are in for a joyful marriage indeed. Please join me everyone in raising a glass to the newly weds, Rob and Sophia. Cheers! 

Best Man Speech Frequentl Asked Questions

Does the best man have to do a speech.

The best man does not have to give a speech if he really does not want to, or if there isn’t enough time because there are other people doing speeches, but it is tradition and expected of the best man to do a speech. 

When Does The Best Man’S Speech Happen?

The best man speech will typically happen after the groom has said a few words. However, every wedding is different, and the bride and groom may organize the day differently depending on how they think the speeches should flow. 

How Long Should A Best Man Speech Be?

A best man speech should be short and sweet, but not too short, and not too long. A happy medium is about 5-6 minutes in length. You don’t want it to be shorter than 3 minutes as it may seem too brief.

The point is to keep the audience engaged, and deliver a few anecdotes, thank the bride and groom, and raise a toast. 

What Should You Include In A Best Man Speech?

There are a few things that you should include in the best man speech. This is who you are, and how you know the bride and groom.

In addition, you need a fun story about the groom and you, and why you think the bride and groom are an excellent match, followed by your best wishes for the couple and a toast to their future together. 

Who Should You Thank In A Best Man Speech?

In the best man speech, you should thank the bride and groom of course, but you can also thank the bridesmaids or groomsmen for their efforts, or say thank you to the parents of the bride and groom, especially if they have contributed a lot to the wedding.

To summarize, writing a best man speech is not all as bad as it seems.

With this ultimate guide, you’ve got all of the tools you need to succeed, and successfully deliver a hilarious, fun, lighthearted speech that is sure to wish the couple all of the best for the future.

Whether you are looking for examples, tips, what to do, or what not to do, we’ve covered it all in this handy guide.

Now, instead of stressing out about what you are going to say, how you are going to say it, you can look forward to the wedding planning process in the run up to the big day, and most importantly…the bachelor party!

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hilarious best man speech examples

Lisa Plaitt

Hello, I’m Lisa Plaitt and I have been married to my wonderful husband for almost five years. We met almost a decade ago now and I love him more everyday. But on my wedding day - the day that was supposed to be about celebrating us - I was far too stressed to enjoy it. My husband proposed to me in spring and it was a very lowkey setting, in our backyard without anyone else around to see it. It was a perfect proposal. But then everything got real, and I was suddenly thrust into planning mode.

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Spicy & Funny Best Man Speech Template

  • 25th Nov, 2021

Jump to the good bits

Speech details.

Speech duration: 10 – 12 minutes

Speech style: Medium, spicy and hilarious

Note: This funny Best Man speech template uses the name ‘Tom’ for the Groom, Sarah for the Bride, ‘Ben’ for the Best Man and other example names. Insert the names for your group as needed.

Your funny Best Man speech template

1. opening and introduce yourself .

Good evening everyone, I’m sure you’ll all admit this has turned out to be a brilliant wedding celebration, yet every silver-lining does have a cloud, and that is, that you’ve now got to listen to me, unfortunately. 

I have put a lot of thought into this speech and I think the most important thing is timing. How do I get the timing right when I have so much ammunition against Tom? Well, a wise man once told me that you should never publicly speak for longer that you can last in the bedroom. So I’m sure my wife Susan will tell you that this speech should have been over 5 seconds ago. 

I suppose I should introduce myself properly. I’m Ben, Tom’s best friend. I’m absolutely honoured to be chosen to be best man, and I was quite surprised when I was asked actually. Not as surprised as Dave and Chris (Groomsmen) were though. But I’m sure Dave was glad he didn’t have to lift a finger, and it meant Chris could start drinking at our breakfast this morning. So, every cloud.

2. Wedding procession observations and give thanks 

Before I undertake the customary duty of giving Tom an uncomfortable few minutes, I would like to say a few thank-yous first. The lovely Bridesmaids, Alison, Niamh, and Nicola. The very glamourous mothers Mary and Jackie. They all look wonderful and have done an excellent job today. Indeed they are only eclipsed by Sarah herself, who, I’m sure you’ll all agree, looks absolutely stunning. 

There is an unwritten rule of wedding etiquette that states that nobody should look more handsome than the groom and I’d like to thank the Groomsmen Liam and John for sticking to that rule to the letter. 

It is really great to see everyone here today, I know it was a long way to travel for some, but we genuinely appreciate it. It just goes to show how just much everyone cares about Tom and Sarah and just how far Andrew Brown will travel for a free meal. 

It was a lovely service, and I know that there was a lot of preparation put into making this a magical day so thank you to everyone involved. 

3. A few words about the Groom (and you) 

So where do I start with Tom? Well for starters he’s… handsome. witty, intelligent. He’s Char… Charm…. Sorry… Tom …. I’m having trouble reading your handwriting, what does that say?

Tom has been known let tell people that his sporting prowess was legendary. In fact, his club contacted me personally to wish him all the best and to say that he made a major contribution to the team..… by retiring two years ago. 

Tom and I have been best friends for a long time now and it’s safe to say that we have been through a lot together. We were always very competitive growing up and have had our fair share of heated arguments. One occasion may have resulted in me pushing Tom off his bike into a lake. 

But don’t worry, Tom did get his revenge. We were out playing in the back garden and I think we were making a tent with a sheet held with big cavity blocks holding it in place on top of a wall. Tom told me to sit inside while he adds the final blocks. Suddenly one came smashing down on me splitting my head open. I was roaring crying, then he started crying realising what he’d done. But he did apologise to me, the next day, as soon as he got into work he emailed me saying sorry about yesterday, no hard feelings.

 Apart from when Liverpool won the league, I know this is the happiest day of your life, and so it should be, for you have just married a most beautiful lady. Sarah is a lovely person, she’s smart, she’s funny, she’s warm, loving and caring. She deserves a great husband and we all know very well she has found one in you. 

4. A few words about the Bride 

This speech isn’t all about Tom I have actually known Sarah for almost as long as I have known Tom. It’s not often the Best Man is also close friends with the Bride. Not that close Tom, don’t worry.  

Sarah is one of the nicest and kindest people you will ever meet. She is also a bit of a control freak. Luckily Tom is really lazy so they are a perfect match. I can tell you that Sarah almost single-handedly organised the whole Wedding day. Can we get a round of applause for her?  It was all very stressful for her. There were problems with the cake, the initial priest, the hair and make-up… There was one point when I thought that the only white Sarah would be wearing today was a straight jacket! But fortunately, it is this lovely dress she has on here today.

5. The Bride and Groom together

It’s great to see Tom and Sarah finally tying the knot, I think they ran out of countries to travel to. And that’s actually a good omen for married life. If they have travelled all around the world together and have managed not to kill each other yet, then married life will be a breeze. 

6. Your gift and messages from well wishers 

(Read out any messages and/or present your gift). 

7. Final words and toast

A wise man once told me that ‘true love is the soul’s recognition of its counterpoint in another’. And, I genuinely believe that Tom found that…when he bought his first full-length mirror. But even the love he has for his own reflection pales in significance compared to the love he has for Sarah. And I think that was very clear for everyone to see today when they were up on the altar. 

Tom’s father mentioned earlier about the traumatic day when Tom lost his best friend and favourite teddy bear ‘Buttons’ in the freezer in the local supermarket. Tom was inconsolable. I met Tom shortly after this harrowing event and I immediately felt like it was my job to replace Buttons as his new best friend. 20 years later it’s safe to say Tom doesn’t need me anymore. Sarah, I wish you well in your role as Tom’s new best friend, I can see he is in safe hands. I may be in the cold now, but at least I didn’t end up in the freezer.

All joking aside, it’s a wonderful honour being Best Man today as Tom is a very special person to me. He is a true friend who never ceases to amaze me with his kindness. He has listened to me through many a crisis and gives without any thought of reward. He is a super guy and a role model of a friend. I’d like to raise a toast with a quote:

  • ‘May your love be modern enough to survive the times… and old fashioned enough to last forever.’ 

Everyone, please raise your glasses, to Tom and Sarah… Mr and Mrs Smith! 

Get the Best Man Speech Guidebook

If you are thinking about your upcoming Best Man duties or need to draft your speech in a hurry you can check out the book the Best Man Speech Guidebook for even more tips and a full list of Best Man speech hacks. It contains the important do’s and don’ts in wedding speech etiquette, some great one-liners, visual gag options, but most importantly a clear speech structure and tried and tested speech templates.

  • The Best Man guide

For more advice and ideas for all of your Best Man duties, check out our Ultimate Best Man Guide page.

More Best Man speech advice

  • 12 Clever Best Man Speech Hacks
  • Best Man Speech: 13 Must Do’s
  • Best Man Speech: 10 Absolute Don’ts
  • 20 Unique Best Man Speech One Liners
  • 3 Ideas For Best Man Speech Visual Gags
  • How To Write A Best Man Speech: Part 1
  • How To Write A Best Man Speech: Part 2
  • Short Best Man Speech Template

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Funny Best Man Speeches

Even if you don't consider yourself a comedian, it's important you sneak some light laughs into your speech. By going with the gentle fun option, you'll win a few chuckles, while steering well clear of risqué repartee. This is also a good approach if you think the newlyweds or the audience might react negatively to 'stronger' material.

What’s the Groom Really Like?

(Struggling to make a start? Then you’ve got your intro already. This speech references how tricky it was for you to write it.)

The Best Man reveals the results of his investigation into the Groom’s past and recalls contributions from family members and friends. As the sample below suggests, the humour in this speech is ideally suited to a Best Man with dry wit. This is a good format if you want to include the memories of those that have known the happy couple longer.

When Paul asked me to be his best man, stories and superlatives starting flooding into my head. I saw this as an opportunity to talk about a hero of mine; a handsome, kind-hearted, quite brilliant man admired by all who encounter him. But when I showed the speech to my wife, she tore it up and told me the idea of a best man speech was to focus on the groom, not myself.

A Reliable College Friend

(Here's an upbeat tribute conveying warm wedding wishes, along with a few cheeky anecdotes. It makes a great fit for just about any wedding.)

In a flattering and concise manner, the Best Man recalls some of the great times he’s shared with the Groom. Memories include years of college mayhem, dating dysfunction, and miserable first jobs. Despite a determination that the Groom should hold on to his bachelor youth, the Best Man shows he's actually delighted his friend has found true love. Anyway, you'll still get to see him down the pub twice a year.

If I could please have your attention. Friends and family, this is the moment we have all been waiting for. Waiting weeks, months, years in fact… to adoringly, lovingly, and respectfully… humiliate, I mean honour Paul and the love he and Linda share.

A Best Man Toast from a Work Colleague

(If the Groom were to write his own best man’s speech this would be it. Well, almost. There is a generous sprinkling of jibes along the way.)

There's no shame in bigging up your mate the Groom, and letting people know what a solid guy he is. In this praise-filled speech the Bride’s family is left in no doubt that their daughter has made a first-class choice. Although there are some sincere messages here, the speech is not without its light-hearted touches. You don't want to flatter the Groom to death, now, do you?

Paul and Linda, I thank you for allowing me to play a special part in what is surely the most important day of your lives. Paul, you could have chosen any one of your work colleagues as your best man, yet you selected me. Well, I was the first person to say yes, anyway.

Robin Hood and His Married Men

(The Best Man serves a warning to the happy couple by way of a cautionary tale. This is fun, imaginative and inclusive speechmaking.)

Everyone loves a good hero. By the end of this speech, you might be one too. Here, the Best Man tells the legend of Robin Hood and His Married Men (get it?). The format is an entertaining yarn; this sort of approach reveals very little about the newlyweds (which may be just what you need if this is a second marriage or one of them has a slightly dodgy record). Also, with this kind of speech, no one is excluded.

I am the best man, but goodness knows why, for no one pays much attention to a man in my position today. They all say, ‘Isn’t the bride radiant?’ and ‘Doesn’t the groom look dashing?’ and ‘How pretty the bridesmaids are!’ But you never hear anyone say, ‘What a fine figure of a man the Best Man is!’ If they notice me at all they think I’m the chauffeur!

Working the Floor with Inclusive Gags

(One of the best ways to get an audience on side is to include them in your speech. This speech does just that, but ultimately makes sure no one is offended (a quality you can never overrate!).)

Here, an über-confident Best Man works the crowd into his routine; that's a pretty neat trick to get everyone paying attention. That doesn’t mean the Groom gets off scot free, however. This speech in particular is aimed at a mixed nationality wedding and a well travelled, rugby playing Groom. Of course, with a little bit of tailoring, it'll suit your own wedding audience down to the ground.

I like to think I've always been there for Paul and Linda. I was present when they met; I was also present when Paul got down on bended knee and proposed. I'm present on their wedding day, obviously. Hopefully all these 'presents' will help soften the fact that I forgot to buy them a wedding gift.

A Quick and Honest Best Man

(No gimmicks here: The Best Man does exactly what’s expected of him and is sat back down before he knows it. Don't worry though; you can still be funny.)

Here's a swift, economical wedding speech. The Best Man suggests in a light-hearted vein that the Groom might not yet be perfect, but his attributes far outweigh his failings. In this case the one-liners poke fun at the Groom’s footballing inability, while stories hone in on the Groom’s inept marriage proposal.

Good afternoon, Ladies and Gents. For those of you who don't know me, my name is Jason and I'm stood up here to say a few words. But first of all, Paul, thanks for agreeing to be my Groom today. And thank you, Linda, for allowing Paul to agree. The handwritten note of permission was a touch of class.

Best Man Gives a History Lesson

(A versatile template than can be adjusted to any Bride and Groom.)

The jokes in this short speech are of the please-all variety. They’ll suit an audience that’s game for a laugh, yet no one’s going to be trashed in the process. Slotting in some gags around significant dates attached to the wedding or the newlyweds (such as birthdays) will demonstrate that you’ve put in the research, and earn you brownie points. This format is particularly applicable if the Groom's life and personality don’t make for great Best Man speech material.

The Bride shares the same birthday as two individuals who, as a pair, succinctly summarise her temperament. The first, representing the thoughtful and peace-loving Linda, is none other than Martin Luther King. The second is Edward Teller, father of the hydrogen bomb.

Leave Them Wanting More: Short Best Man Speech

(A condensed speech from a Best Man willing to take a swipe at himself.)

With this speech you can leave the jokes intact and fit your personal words around them.

Paul and I have had some terrific nights out over the past ten years. I have really enjoyed his company and sunk many pints as a result. I wouldn't say we drank to excess… we drank to anything. In all seriousness though, a friend like Paul is hard to find. This morning, for instance, I had to look in three pubs and a wine bar.

Best Man From University

(Are you a uni or college friend of the Groom? Here’s how to roast him gently, rather than douse him in petrol and set the poor guy ablaze.)

This Best Man speech illustrates how a Groom’s career, character quirks and hobbies can be melded into a seamless story. The template accommodates anecdotes at the beginning and quick fire humour at the end. Hook people on the stories, before bringing the speech to a rip-roaring climax. They’ll appreciate that.

Today, I want to pay tribute to a man who personifies intelligence, ambition, tact, generosity, and integrity. But it is Paul’s wedding so it's only fair that I talk about him as well.

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In This Article

  • Top Speech Examples
  • How To Write The Perfect Speech
  • Speech Template

Best Man Speech Ideas

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  • Toasts Examples
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Frequently Asked Questions

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Best Man Speech Magic: Crafting Words that Resonate and Inspire

Natalia Bayeva

Via Unsplash

Hey there! Your friend’s wedding is just around the corner, and he’s chosen you to be the best man? Crafting the perfect best man speech might seem daunting, but trust us, it’s simpler than you imagine.

Below, you’ll find a wealth of tips and examples from Wedding Forward team to guide you through crafting a best man speech that will leave a lasting impression. Moreover, our editorial team interviewed two distinguished experts in the field: Mindy Weiss, the founder of Mindy Weiss Party Consultants and a best-selling author, and Steven Greitzer, a wedding tech entrepreneur and officiant, serving as CEO of Provenance . Their invaluable tips and advice also have been integrated into this article.

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Top Best Man Speech Examples

It is much easier to write a best man speech when you have some examples to draw upon for inspiration. That’s why Wedding Forward team have prepared variety collection of inspired best man speech to help you craft your own!

Best Man Speech For Friend

Best Man Speech for Brother

“Good evening, hope everyone is having a good time tonight. I feel very privileged and honored to be standing here tonight celebrating this lovely union. Two years ago, Matt gave the best man speech at my wedding and made a lot of awkward jokes. So needless to say, I’ve been waiting for this moment for a really long time! For those who don’t know, I am Matt’s brother, Mike. I first met Matt when I was two years old at our parent’s house in Boston. To be quite honest, I wasn’t thrilled because I really wanted a sister. And I think he knew because Matt would do ridiculous things like throw my toothbrush in the toilet, pour water at me when I was asleep and run across the room naked when I had any friends over. This made me less popular than I already was. Matt always excelled in school, was captain of the debate team (apologies to Cara, but he can argue his way out of anything!) and can make a mean steak. The truth is, despite him being an annoying brother at the time, I came out winning in the end. Because of him and this beautiful night, I am getting the sister I always wanted. Cara, you’re beautiful and our family loves you so much. Thank you for making my brother so happy. Let’s celebrate this amazing union and raise a glass to the newlyweds ! On behalf of the groomsmen and bridesmaids, we’d like to wish you a life full of love, happiness, and joy. To everyone who made tonight happen, thank you. You’ve made this night very special.” Source

Short Best Man Speech

“Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention, please? As the best man, I stand here today to say a few words about the remarkable love story between my incredible friend, [groom’s name], and his beautiful bride, [bride’s name]. [Groom’s name] and I have been through thick and thin together, and I’ve had the privilege of witnessing his growth as a person. But it wasn’t until [bride’s name] came into his life that I saw a change I can only describe as transformative. Their love is like a beacon, guiding them through life’s ups and downs. So here’s to the newlyweds—a couple who have found not just love, but true companionship. May your journey be filled with happiness, passion, and an everlasting bond.”

Funny Best Man Speech Examples

Best man talk for adam and kate.

“Adam and Kate – What a great day to get married! Marriage carries new responsibilities. Kate – from now on, you should never argue or disagree with Adam, because he is now the head of the family and the king of his castle. You will be expected to keep your hair and make-up perfect at all times – to dress in a way that pleases Adam. You should cook his favorite meals every night and encourage him to go out with his friends on a regular basis. Do these simple things and your marriage will be blessed with many years of happiness. Kate – I know that Adam loves you very much… because he spent a long time writing this speech for me. Congratulations to the both of you!” Source

Best Man Presentation for Sarah & Simon

“Sarah & Simon – every great relationship starts with rings. In the beginning, the phone would ring and just the thought of speaking to one another was exciting. Your love grew and so did your commitment to each other. The engagement ring soon came after. There were no doubts… your love was true. The engagement ring has now turned into a wedding ring and we are all here today to celebrate your marriage. Now of course… the suffer-ring begins. (smile and raise your glass) Peace and happiness to the new bride and groom!” Source

Speech for Neil and Claire

“Hi my name is Paul and Neil has asked me to be his best man for this wonderful occasion. I would like to say it is a very special honor but with it, comes the responsibility of giving the bloody speech. I would not say it is very comfortable to wear a tuxedo in a 30-degree church, which is not air-conditioned. The church ceremony I’m sure you’ll all agree was a wonderful, wonderful occasion. Maybe a little hot, but I’m glad to see so many of you have replaced your electrolytes with fuel of the alcoholic kind since the reception began. I have known Neil and Claire for_________ [how many years] years. You might say Neil and I met by accident, but it is no accident that Neil met Claire. If you know Neil you know he is an excellent athlete, in fact I noticed his Athletes foot right away. This was a man who had his knees and ankles shaved, for easy taping. I knew this was a hard-core sports fanatic. We both share a tremendous love of football and basketball. For many years, we have had a running bet during the season as to who will score more goals or more runs which of course, I always won. Neil is a ______________ [Groom’s Occupation] in Truro, and I thought__________________________________[Funny or quirky aspect about grooms occupation] Neil is a man who has dedicated his life to __________________[Grooms occupation] And now I’m sure will use his experience with ___________________________[what the Groom does in his occupation] in his marriage with Claire. It is great that Neil found Claire. He has always been looking for someone young, dynamic, intelligent, attractive, and with good health insurance. Neil and Claire met_________________________ [where they meet], But I have it on good authority that Neil started looking for a wife on the internet. And with a multitude of resources at his fingertips, he found some really great stuff, but sadly was unable to find himself a suitable partner. That is, until I mentioned to him that the correct category to be looking should be Woman Seeking Man. I explained the way it works, send an old picture when you still had lots of hair, lie about your height and weight, and at all other times be sincere and honest. I imagine that when Neil and Claire met and introduced each other he said I’m Neil and she said, “I need a Diamond.” So, Neil said, sure let’s pick one out. Claire is a Diamond. Neil is a gem; I think together they make beautiful jewellery. No Marriage would be complete without some brotherly advice to help set you on your way… So I canvassed the room and got some really good stuff for you! Love, honor and cherish each other, and don’t forget to take out the garbage. Your wife is always right. Just in case she is not right, refer back to #2. Always, yes always, notice every new hairstyle or dress. Do something nice for each other every single day. If she asks if something makes her look fat the answer is categorically, NO. Flowers are always a good Idea, even if you are not in trouble. There is really nothing better than a good foot rub or massage. Your wife is more important than sports. I guess. Even the cup final. It is a great joy for me to see Neil and Claire so happy. You learn things when you get older. Hmmm, I mean more mature. You make better decisions, isn’t it great that two people would entwine and commit to each other for life. Love, isn’t that what it is all about? We are here to celebrate that glorious event and this ceremony is all about letting the world know how much Neil and Claire’s love for each other is a reflection of one’s own soul in another’s. Anyway, it is time to celebrate the joyous and unbridled love that these two spectacular people will share the rest of their lives. Would you please stand now and join me in a toast. To love and laughter and happily ever after.” Source

What are the key elements that should be included in a memorable and heartfelt best man’s speech?

That is what Steven Greitzer, wedding tech entrepreneur and officiant, CEO of Provenance, said:

“There are many key elements to take into account when pulling together a great toast:

  • Include 2-3 stories in your speech that capture the essence of the groom and your friendship.
  • Make sure your speech is appropriate by discussing “no-go’s” with the couple beforehand.
  • Acknowledge the groom’s partner in your speech and speak about how the relationship has helped the groom grow (more on that below).
  • Offer a thematic takeaway, such as the importance of friendship or the strength of the couple’s love.
  • Be sure to practice

The Provenance Toast Builder is the best and easiest way to make sure your wedding toast captures what you’re trying to say.”

Try the Toast Builder

How to Write a Best Man Speech

For a great wedding speech, there are some simple rules you have to follow. Here you will find examples of best man speeches Dos and Don’ts from our editors.

  • Plan your speech ahead (think about your best man speech structure, choose formal or funny style) and practice.
  • Tell a short story ( keep the speech to about 5 minutes or less ) with jokes (2 or 3 will be enough).
  • Get sentimental at some point, make compliments to the bride.
  • Finish on an optimistic note (end your speech with love quotes or wishes for the happy couple).
  • Be thankful (express gratitude towards the couple, their family, and anyone who helped make the wedding happen).

Don’ts

  • Do not cross the 2-5 mins time limit.
  • Do not make it about you.
  • Avoid dirty jokes.
  • Do not ignore the bride. Let her know how happy you are, that she is ending up with your friend.
  • Avoid rude remarks. Keep your manners in check, even if it’s for a day.

Infographic

hilarious best man speech examples

Best Man Speech Templates

Click here to download free printable templates of best man speech!

When creating the Best Man speech outline for your talk, include the following elements to involve everyone, making one and all feel that they are important participants in the merrymaking for the newlywed couple:

Use a Magnetic Opening Line

The opening words of your Best Man presentation should grab everyone’s attention. If you favor a romantic approach to start off a speech, you can start with a statement like, “True love wins all,” and then list the various ways the Groom, through his true love for his Bride, has won all her attention and affections.

  • If some of the Groom’s favorite hip singer-songwriters date back to the 1960s and ’70s, you can quote from Bob Dylan: “ Love is just a four-letter word ,” going on to mention the many words of just four letters that relate to feelings of true love like “ kiss, hold, keep and ever. ” Be intent and clever with the use of language, and you will achieve better engagement with your audience.
  • If your tastes (or the tastes of the newlyweds) are somewhat more classical, you can start by quoting the familiar line from Elizabeth Barrett Browning: “ How do I love thee, Let me count the ways. ” This popular line has been repeated in many variations by countless poets and songwriters ever since, so have no fear of labeling yourself as an egghead when quoting it. This opening line will also give you a chance to mention the main virtues and attributes of the Bride.

Thank the Other Speakers

It is always appropriate and appreciated if you thank the other speakers for the occasion. These speakers usually include the Maid of Honor and the Bride’s Father as well as any other members of the wedding party that the Bride and Groom ask to speak.

It is always good form to express your gratitude for their contributions to this special moment and event. Never criticize or make jokes about what they say or how they say it. Just thank them politely and continue with your own remarks since you know very well how to write a best-man speech.

Congratulate the Newlyweds

Congratulate the wedding couple on this exciting first chapter in their lives together. This is the ideal time to tell the guests how you met your great friend, the Groom. If you happen to be the Groom’s brother or cousin, you can recreate moments of hilarity from your younger years together or shared experiences of suspense or intrigue.

Recalling funny incidents or telling best man speech jokes involving the Groom is totally acceptable, so long as you keep the format and content clean and respectable.

Expert tip from Steven Greitzer:

“A great best man speech strikes the perfect balance of humor and sincerity. You want it to be memorable, but for the right reasons. Check with the couple to see if there are any topics you need to avoid or any topics that might be of particular concern to anyone in the audience. In the Provenance Toast Builder , the couple has the option to call out any topic they do, or don’t, want you to include. If you have any jokes in your speech you are unsure about, run them by someone who is close to the couple who you trust. And if you have a feeling that a joke might upset them or not land well with the audience – err on the side of caution. It’s their big day, not yours! There’s a way to have a funny best man speech that doesn’t upset grandma. Find the balance.”

Compliment the Bride

Now it is time to pull out the stops and give high praise to the Bride using your knowledge of how to write a best man talk. Highlight and emphasize her finest qualities, talents, and accomplishments.

Let them know just how overjoyed you are to celebrate the marriage of these two special people of whom you think so highly. Then give the Bride another charming compliment using top-quality speech writing tips.

Read Messages from Absent Guests

Take time to read some messages from invited guests who could not attend the wedding. This gesture is always appreciated by the absent guests and the Bride and Groom, alike. It also includes their congratulatory thoughts and best wishes for the newlyweds in the day’s special events.

Include a Famous Quote or Poem

Enchant your attentive audience of wedding guests further by reciting a well-known quote or poem that suits the occasion. This adds a creative literary element to the post-wedding celebration for the honored couple. You may want to consult other templates, including a listing of groomsman speech examples.

Best Man Speech Quotes

Choose Best Man speech quotes that reflect the couple’s personality, add humor, and keep them relevant.

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop. H. L. Mencken
Marriage is a workshop where husband works and wife shops.
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. Mignon McLaughlin

Propose a Toast to the Wedding Couple

Raise your glass of champagne so the guests can eagerly follow your example as you deliver a heartfelt toast of optimistic good wishes for the excellent health, increasing wealth, and everlasting happiness of the newlyweds.

The toast should be given with gusto and true sincerity and may include mild best-man speech jokes. Remember that you speak for all the well-wishers in the room who want all the best for this newly married Bride and Groom, so put your best energy, spirit, and talents for convincing elocution into this featured Grand Finale.

The “Thankful” Speech

“Hello everyone, it’s such a pleasure to be here tonight as [Groom’s] best man. And I want to begin with saying what an honor it is that I was chosen to stand by your side today. You’ve always been someone that I looked up to and I am just beyond grateful that I get to share in this moment with you and [Bride]. [Groom] is someone that I’ve come to care for greatly over the years and I am so happy that he’s found someone to share his life with and start a family with. [Groom] has always been my right hand throughout the biggest moments of my life and I can’t wait to be able to watch everything beautiful unfold for the two of you. Cheers to a lifetime of happiness!”

The “Smart Move” Speech

“There’s an old saying about friendship that reads, “It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them,” and goodness that couldn’t be more true for me and my boy, [Groom]. I could go into all the funny stories that include some of that stupidity but instead I’d rather focus on all the smart moves he’s made. His friendships, the relationship he has with his family, his career, it’s all a reflection of the incredible man he’s become. But really, the smartest move he’s made is marrying you, [Bride]. Let’s toast to the best decision [Groom’s] ever made. I wish you a lifetime of love, happiness and success.”

The “She Was the One” Speech

“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you all for coming out tonight to celebrate the wedding of two people we all love, [Bride] & [Groom]! When I first met [Bride], I knew that she was the woman [Groom] would end up marrying. Even if it hadn’t dawned on him quite yet, it was obvious to everyone around just how smitten he was with her. They talk about a bride’s glow, but this man was shining since the moment he met [Bride]. He changed for the better without realizing it. And we all could see it. He couldn’t stop talking about her. We’d go out with the boys and [Bride’s] name would be brought up every two minutes. So, when he came to me to tell me that he would be proposing my only response was, ‘Well, it’s about time!’ There’s something special about these two. They go together without forcing it. They love each other without fighting it. And they care about each other without thinking about it. She was the one from the very beginning [Groom], and we’re all so happy to be able to take part in your big day. Cheers!”

Best Man Speech Opening Lines

Your opening lines are your best-man speech icebreakers, so it’s important that they are good. Grab the attention of your guests with witty best man speech openers such as these.

  • “I would like to begin by congratulating the groom on his excellent taste in best men. He has really outdone himself this time, and I’m pleased.”
  • “I have been asked by the bride and groom not to share any embarrassing stories, crude jokes, or pranks during my best man’s speech… so I guess that’ll be it from me! Thank you all for listening.”
  • “If you cannot hear me at the back, nothing to worry about. By the complete silence in the front row here, you can rest assured that you’re really not missing much.”
  • “Is anyone here this afternoon feeling nervous and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead? If you are, it’s probably because you’ve just married (groom’s name).”
  • “All of you here who really know the bride must know that she is a wonderful person who deserves a good husband. Thank goodness (groom’s name) married her before she found one.”

Best Man Speech One-Liners

I am about to make the groom cry. I just received the food bill.
He is smart, tall, kind, generous….. Who am I actually talking about?
Hi, the groom is a great friend. Our friendship is 2hours old. I was hired as he’s got no friends.
His colleagues describe him as a first-class banker – I may have misheard them.
I heard some time that marriage is a 50/50 affair. Believe that at your own peril. We have factors called women and improper fractions.

One-liners are sharp jokes delivered in one sentence. A good one-liner is concise and meaningful. It is instant but loaded with humor that can keep the guests laughing for a while. It is important that the best man speech jokes contain one-liners.

Best Man Toasts Examples

“It’s been an emotional day, even the cake is in tiers.”
“Folks, I have been told I am not allowed to have a drink until AFTER my speech. If I seem like I’m in a hurry to finish, it’s because I am.”
“I hope the two of you have the two essential things it takes to have a successful marriage 1) a sense of humor 2) selective hearing.”
“Psychiatrists say that girls tend to marry men like their fathers. That must be why mothers cry at weddings.”
“Love is not about how often you say I love you, but how often you show that it’s true.”

Best Man Speech Jokes

“They say marriage is a journey, and tonight we celebrate the beginning of an epic road trip for the bride and groom. Just remember, guys, never forget to ask for directions!”
“They say the key to a successful marriage is patience, understanding, and a remote control with fresh batteries. Groom, make sure you always keep that remote handy!”
“Let’s raise our glasses to the newlyweds: may their love be like Wi-Fi, strong and never disconnecting, even in the midst of Netflix binges!”
“As the best man, it’s my duty to share a piece of advice with the groom: in marriage, always remember that a happy wife means a happy life… and also remember to nod and agree, even when she’s wrong!”
“Marriage is a lifelong commitment, just like the gym membership the groom signed up for and rarely uses. But this time, there are no cancellation fees!”

Best Man Speech Delivery and Presentation Tips

best man speech attire groom olly allars

When delivering your best man speech, it’s essential to captivate the audience with your words and presence. Here are some tips to ensure a memorable and engaging delivery:

  • Maintain good eye contact with the audience: Look directly at the guests while speaking. Eye contact helps establish a connection and shows that you are genuinely engaged with them.
  • Speak clearly and at a moderate pace: Enunciate your words clearly and avoid rushing through your speech. Speaking at a moderate pace allows the audience to understand and absorb your message effectively.
  • Use appropriate gestures and body language to enhance your delivery: Use hand gestures and body movements to emphasize key points and add energy to your speech. However, be mindful of not going overboard and distracting from your message.
  • Incorporate pauses for comedic timing and to allow the audience to react: Timing is crucial, especially when delivering humorous anecdotes or punchlines. Pause before and after delivering a joke to build anticipation and give the audience time to laugh and react.

By implementing these delivery and presentation tips, you’ll engage the audience, leave a lasting impression, and make your best man speech a memorable highlight of the wedding celebration.

Are there any common mistakes to avoid, and how to overcome nervousness or stage fright?

According to wedding planner Mindy Weiss, “speeches can help make or break a wedding” . And we agree with this opinion. Speeches have the power to elevate the celebration, bringing tears of joy and laughter to guests, while also creating cherished memories that last a lifetime. However, poorly delivered speeches can disrupt the flow and energy of the event, leaving guests feeling disconnected and the couple disappointed.

Steven Greitzer convinced that one of the biggest mistakes is when the person giving the wedding speech only talks about the partner they’re closest with, unintentionally making the other partner feel left out and unimportant: “To help remedy this, the Provenance Toast Builder gives you the option to either talk about each partner 50/50, or to talk 70% about your person and 30% about their partner (which is a good rule of thumb). The Toast Builder also has thoughtful prompts to encourage you to share why they’re both 1) good people and 2) a great match for each other.

What is the best man supposed to say in his speech?

The best man should share anecdotes about the groom, praise the couple, thank everyone, and propose a toast. Keep it lighthearted and sincere.

What do you say in a short speech for Bestman?

In a short best man speech, express gratitude, share a memorable moment about the groom, and toast to the couple’s happiness. Keep it concise and impactful.

How do I write a good man speech?

Write a good best man speech by including humor, expressing genuine sentiments, avoiding inappropriate content, and keeping it focused on the couple. Practice for smooth delivery and timing.

There is truly something for everyone today to create the perfect Best Man Speech for that very special couple and their after-wedding reception, dinner, and celebration. Fond remembrances, amusing stories and anecdotes, humorous quotes, and emotional phrases end with the joyful ring of a clever, yet heartfelt Best Man Toast to the Bride and Groom. The contemporary wedding is truly a work of love and art with all the trimmings and enticing treats for one and all to treasure and enjoy.

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Rock Your Best Man Speech Using Our Expert-Approved Advice

Best man smiling and holding microphone.

  • Chapelle writes articles for The Knot Worldwide. She covers all things wedding-related and has a personal interest in covering celebrity engagements and fashion.
  • Before joining The Knot Worldwide, Chapelle was an editorial intern for Subvrt Magazine.
  • Chapelle has a degree in English writing from Loyola University New Orleans.

Pat yourself on the back—you're the best man. It's a good feeling when one of your loved ones asks you to be their right hand for the wedding. Beyond the fun best man duties , like planning an epic bach party , you'll have to give a rousing best man speech. We believe it's arguably the most meaningful duty, but don't let that get you nervous. Whether you're a public speaking pro or have only delivered speeches while on the eighth-grade debate team, boost your chances of making your best man speech a hit by using our helpful tips, ideas and examples for inspiration.

In this article:

Printable Template | How to Write | Examples | Tips | FAQs

Printable Best Man Speech Template

Delivering a best man wedding speech doesn't have to feel like a chore. Use the template below as a checklist while you're writing your best man speech.

free printable best man speech template

How to Write a Best Man Speech Outline

We're guessing the thought of crafting a flawless best man speech from scratch feels pretty overwhelming right about now. Start by drafting a bare-bones outline (trust us, drawing up a rough outline is way more palatable than writing a fully fleshed-out speech). You don't need to include every element in your wedding speech . Instead, customize it to fit the couple, the event and your relationship with the groom.

1. Have a killer opening line.

Successful best man speeches always start with a good opener. Introduce yourself and explain your connection to the happy couple. Have fun with this part by sharing a quick joke or quoting a poem so your speech doesn't start off stale. For example, "Hello everyone! For those of you who don't know me, thank you so much for coming to my wedding. [pause for laughter] Sorry about that...I'm a little nervous."

2. Thank the other speakers.

Once you address the audience, give props to the previous speaker to help lead into your speech. If you know your speech has a sillier sentiment, now's your chance to warn your audience in the change of direction. Here's an example: "Let's give it up to the amazing speech given by the wonderful maid of honor . If you enjoyed how thoughtful and sweet her speech was, you better get the tissues ready for this one!"

Next, express your gratitude to the couple's parents. Thank the couples' parents for not only raising incredible adults and, if they helped pay for the wedding, for hosting such a great party. Here's an example: "I'd like to begin by expressing my deepest gratitude to the couples' parents for raising such amazing people, who I'm fortunate to call my best friends. I would also like to thank their parents for hosting such an awesome celebration for all of us to enjoy this evening."

3. Say a few words about your friend's new spouse.

Another writing a best man speech tip is always to give a special shoutout to the new spouse so they feel welcomed and included. Yes, we know you most likely have a closer relationship with the groom, but don't let that stop you from showering them with kind words––it's their big day too. Talk about the qualities you like about them and why you love them in the groom's life. Try this, "I'm so happy [Spouse's Name] fell in love with [Groom's Name]. Firsthand I've seen the grace, intelligence and confidence [Spouse's Name] has, which explains why [Groom's Name] knew he wanted to marry [Spouse's Name] after their first date."

4. Share personal stories.

What's going to make your best man speech stand out are personal stories. We suggest adding one or two anecdotes, like your favorite memories with the groom (and their partner, if you want). Avoid choosing a story that rambles on and has no sentimental or funny ending—keep it lighthearted and short. Here's a silly example, "I remember when we first met in first grade. [Groom's Name] had just glued his hand to his face but still used his free one to shake my hand and ask if I wanted to be his friend."

5. Talk about the couple's relationship.

This is the time to speak about why the groom and their new spouse are a great couple. Share how they first met and how their relationship has grown so other guests can get a better insight into the newlyweds. If you helped the love birds meet, say something like this in your best man speech: "I know I said earlier I'm the best man, but I lied. I'm actually Cupid because I'm the one who introduced these two eight years ago."

6. Propose a toast.

Finally, close out your best man speech with a heartfelt toast. Ask everyone to raise a glass and provide well wishes to the newly married couple. Steal this wedding toast : "Everyone, please join me in raising a glass to such a wonderful couple. I wish you a lifetime of peace, love and happiness. Love you guys!"

Find your kind of venue

Best man speech examples.

Now that you know how to write the outline, let us provide you with some inspiration. Here are four best man speech ideas for every type of delivery.

Short Best Man Speech Example

Short best man speeches can make the grade just as much as long ones. Try this short but sweet example.

As the poet, Dante once said, 'A great flame follows a little spark.' When [Groom's Name] met [Spouse's Name], there was a little spark. I know because I talked to him the next day.

From the way he talked about [Spouse's Name], this stranger he chatted up at a Halloween party, I could tell this spark was something special.

You two are fantastic together. May the flame burn long, and may sparks continue to fly. Cheers to the newlyweds!

Funny Best Man Speech Example

Funny best man speeches are our favorite. You get to show off your comedic skills while giving loving well-wishes to the happy couple.

Hello! For those who don't know me, I'm [Your Name], the best man. I've known [Groom's Name] since middle school, which means that it was before we learned mullets weren't a good look for either of us.

[Groom's Name] and [Spouse's Name] told me there are some topics I should avoid in this speech so…[Look through cue cards, then shake head and dramatically drop them all to the floor but one.]

[Reading from the remaining cue card] [Groom's Name] is really the best friend I've ever had. He's done so many wonderful things it would be difficult to name them all. Hey, [a Groomsman's Name], I can't read your handwriting here!

But seriously, it's all true. This guy is a great friend, the best I've got, and I'm very proud to stand by his side today.

[Spouse's Name], I was hoping to be the best-looking person in the room today but obviously, I failed miserably. You look beautiful and radiant. I'm beyond happy for the two of you.

May you always find joy in the little things, like your Xbox and 'Star Wars.' Oh wait, that's my personal goal. You should actually find joy in each other, and do everything you can to have a lifetime of happiness together. Let's toast the newlyweds!

Best Man Speech for Brother Example

Need best man speech examples for your brother? Use our speech below as a guide to delivering a sweet message to your older or younger brother.

On my fourth birthday, my parents got me a brother…I wanted a puppy.

But seriously, as a kid [Groom's Name] wanted to do everything I did. He used to follow me around. He used to sneak into my room and play with my Matchbox cars. Our parents could get him to eat his broccoli by making me eat my broccoli.

It wasn't until after I went to college that he started going down his own path. He started doing volunteer work. He found a job he loves, a pretty killer apartment and, of course, he found [Spouse's Name].

[Spouse's Name], you're the nicest person I've ever met, and my brother is so blessed to have someone like you in his life. Thank you for being there for him.

I'm so happy you two found each other especially because I'm gaining a sister today. Oh, and I want to set the record straight. I'm glad I didn't get a puppy that day. I love you, little bro.

Congratulations to both of you. I wish you lots of laughter, love and joy as a married couple. Cheers to the newlyweds!

Best Man Speech for Best Friend Example

For those who need a best man speech sample for their best friend, we got you covered. Here's how to tell your BFF you're happy for them on their special day.

Classic Catholic wedding ceremony in St. Louis, Missouri.

Good evening, everyone! I'm [Your Name], and I'm extremely honored to call myself [Groom's Name]'s best man. Also, please excuse the puffiness under my eyes, I've been happy crying since before the ceremony.

I first met [Groom's Name] while working at a pizza joint called Domenica's while in college. I hated being a server with all my heart, but whenever [Groom's Name] and I were scheduled together, it made it so much more bearable.

We laughed until we cried, ate hundreds of garlic knots and I can't tell you the amount of times we accidentally got pizza dough stuck to the ceiling during our pizza toss competitions. But even after we both quit and moved on to bigger and better things, we still kept in touch and I'm eternally grateful.

One of those bigger and better things was [Spouse's Name]. [Groom's Name] really discovered the perfect piece to his puzzle. [Spouse's Name] laughs at his bad jokes, listens to his long monologues about Batman vs. Superman and most importantly, loves him no matter what. [Spouse's Name] is a phenomenal and caring person who deserves the world, and I know [Groom's Name] will do everything he can to give it to them.

Thank you both for allowing me to be a part of your beautiful wedding, and I can't wait to see what else is in store for you in the future. Love you guys, and cheers to the handsome couple!

Best Man Speech Tips

Good news! We got how to give a best man speech tips from Dominic Bliss, wedding writer and author of Being the Best Man for Dummies. Study up on these helpful pointers below to minimize pre-speech jitters and ensure a smooth delivery.

Plan ahead.

The first tip in our guide on how to write a best man speech is to get started in advance. (As in, do not procrastinate.) "Start writing a best man speech at least two months before the wedding," Bliss says. "As the wedding nears, there are lots of events—suit fittings and a coed shower, perhaps—that could distract you from getting your writing done." Brainstorm and write down any stories, jokes or best man speech quotes you want to include. The more time you have to prepare your best man speech, the better. This way, you'll be able to be fully present at upcoming wedding festivities.

Be genuine.

Whether the wedding guests are strangers or family, it can feel nerve-racking to deliver your best man speech with all eyes on you. To ease the awkwardness, provide anecdotes and stories about your relationship with the couple. Everyone loves a bit of nostalgia, and the guests get to know you better.

With that said, stay true to how you normally act while making your speech. There's no need for you to change who you are for some made-up public speaking persona. If you feel more comfortable cracking jokes throughout your speech, do it. If you are better at being sentimental and don't mind leaving everyone misty-eyed, take that approach. Remember, the couple chose you to speak at their wedding because they felt you could add something special to their big day. As long as you deliver a heartfelt speech, the newlyweds and guests will love it.

Know what topics to avoid.

There are a few topics to omit from the best man speech. No matter how funny you (and even the groom) might think they are, someone is bound to be offended or put off if you mention:

  • Negativity about marriage in general.
  • Past relationships.
  • Previous marriages/divorces.
  • Drinking, drugs, gambling.
  • "Adult" humor or any other mention of sex.

After all, your best man speech should celebrate the newlywed couple and their love rather than causing future friction. Keep it PG.

Consider adding jokes.

If you want to deliver a funny best man speech, consider poking some fun at the groom. "Every groom will have some funny characteristic or quirk you can ridicule," Bliss notes. "As long as it's something everyone can appreciate, it's sure to get a laugh. Avoid obscure references or inside jokes. You want older guests and those who don't know him well to see the funny side too." Be strategic about your jokes too. You can make jokes about the groom but leave their new spouse alone.

Write it down.

Even those with a great memory will feel more confident with a written speech or at least a few bullet points to keep them on track. Nerves can mess with your memory, so don't think you're a failure if you have to bring notes with you. (Even CEOs do this at corporate events.) Bliss suggests using small note cards instead of a sheet of paper since they "won't flap around."

And yes we know many groomsmen will want to read off their cell phones out of convenience, but wedding planners recommend against it. The lighting from your phone screen can ruin the wedding photographer's photos and can be distracting to guests. Practice writing down your speech instead—it's quite soothing.

Practice with an audience.

This tip is a must when it comes to writing a best man speech. Even if you think you have this whole thing in the bag, practice delivering your wedding speech aloud at least three times. When you're by yourself, take a video and watch the playback to get a feel for how your speech is going. (Do you say "um" between every sentence? Are your gestures a little robotic?) If your friends can't offer critiques in person, "send [the video] to a close friend who won't be going to the wedding and who can give you honest feedback," Bliss recommends.

Finally: don't mumble. A great best man speech becomes boring if it's monotonous or guests are straining to hear you. Speak confidently and slowly.

Best Man Frequently Asked Questions

If this is your first time giving a best man speech, you might have a lot of questions. Here are answers to the top wedding speech inquiries.

How Long Should a Best Man Speech Be?

In general, the best man speech length should be at least three minutes, but no more than five minutes. This is enough time to say something meaningful before guests get too antsy. Of course, you should adjust your speech length to the event. If you're speaking at a last-minute wedding, it might require a brief speech, while a formal affair could call for a longer toast. But you might also be wondering, "how many words should a best man speech be?" We suggest between 700 to 1000 words.

How to Start a Best Man Speech

Begin your speech by addressing the audience and thanking them for attending the wedding. Here's an example, "Hello, everyone. On behalf of the newlyweds, I want to thank everyone for attending this amazing celebration." You can even butter up the crowd by saying how lovely everyone looks this evening. Then, introduce yourself and how you know the groom or couple. This is a great opportunity to add a funny story or memory you have with them that can lead you into the rest of your speech.

How to End a Best Man Speech

Raise your glass and offer a toast wishing the couple a lifetime of happiness, excellent health and success. Your toast can include one final joke or be a marriage quote from your and the groom's favorite movie. Either way, take this chance to sincerely express the newlyweds well. Remember, concluding the speech is the easiest part.

Does the Best Man Have to Give a Speech?

It's not required, but it's expected that the best man gives a speech—especially if the other honor attendants are giving one. If speaking in public makes your stomach turn, consider showing your appreciation for the couple in a different way. We've seen best men do upbeat choreography, sing the couple's favorite song or even present a wedding video they made.

When Does the Best Man Give His Speech?

Following the traditional wedding speech order , the best man speaks after the maid of honor and is the last speech during the reception. There's no need to use this itinerary since the speech order depends on your reception timeline and wedding party size. The to-be-weds might even ask you to deliver your speech during the rehearsal dinner, which most likely will be in front of a smaller audience (score!). Before the wedding and during, double-check with the couple to ensure you know when to give your best man speech so no one has to hunt you down when it's your turn.

bride in wedding dress smiles with mother of the bride wearing a korean hanbok

hilarious best man speech examples

30 Funny Opening Lines for Wedding Speeches

Handy one-liners to make the guests lol.

hilarious best man speech examples

If you've read our post on how to make a great best man speech , you'll know that we recommend starting with a joke, and here, we're sharing 30 foolproof examples! The beauty of this list is that it works for any wedding speech, whether you're a groom, bride, best man, bridesmaid, groomsman, bridesman, groomsmaid, father of the bride, father of the groom, mother of the bride, mother of the groom, granny or grandad, or just a close pal with a knack for public speaking! Boasting everything from eye roll-worthy classics to offbeat gags, our round-up of funny opening lines for wedding speeches is sure to have something to suit your personal style, and many of them can be customised to pack an even bigger punch on the day. Kick off with one of these gems, and you'll not only put the audience at ease, you'll set yourself up for a terrific wedding speech!

hilarious best man speech examples

25 Funny Opening Lines for Wedding Speeches

Note: [Name] can indicate yourself, the bride/groom, the couple as a whole, or another member of the bridal party!

1. “Gosh, what an emotional day it’s been. Even the cake is in tiers!”

2. “Hi everyone! I’m [Name] and it’s time for me to give the speech I frantically scribbled down 15 minutes ago!”

3. "The couple have requested that I don't share any embarrassing stories... so that's it from me! Thanks for listening!"

4. "[Name], I love you so much, and I really hope you'll feel the same about me after you hear my speech."

bride giving a speech

5. "I just want to start by congratulating [previous speaker's Name] on their wonderful speech. I always knew it would be hard to follow and I was right, I couldn't follow a word of it."

6. "The couple actually had a bit of trouble finding someone to make a speech today. They started by asking their funniest friend, and they said no. Then they asked their most charming friend, and they said no. After that, they asked their best-looking friend and, again, they said no. Then they asked me, and, after already turning them down three times, I couldn't refuse again."

Bride gives speech Olga Hogan Photography: Hannah & Eoghan

7. "Ladies and gentlemen, today we witnessed a unique event in history - it's the first and presumably last time anyone has trusted me to give a speech!"

8. "[Name] and I share the same sense of humour, so if you don't like my jokes, you can blame them!"

9. "Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today to celebrate something truly magical. Something so rare and fortuitous and wonderful that it simply must be celebrated. I am, of course, talking about the open bar/donut wall/photo booth/[Name] wearing a tie ."

hilarious best man speech examples

10. "Where do I start with [Name]? They're kind, intelligent, gorgeous, charming... [directed at them] sorry, I'm having trouble reading your writing, you'll have to tell me the rest later."

11. "I think we can all agree that it's been a fantastic day. But unfortunately that ends right here with my speech."

12. "Loyal. Kind. Honest. Generous... That's enough about me, I'm here to talk about [Name]!"

hilarious best man speech examples

13. "I'd like to begin my speech by giving the happy couple some relationship advice, but unfortunately I'm single and spend most of my time trying to coax my cat into little outfits/browsing Doctor Who fan sites/playing Rock Paper Scissors with Alexa."

14. "A few months ago, [Name] called me up and asked, 'What are your feelings on marriage?' I had to tell them that, while I was very flattered, I wasn't ready to settle down just yet."

15. "Can everyone hear me OK? If you can't hear me in the back, the silence from the people at the front should reassure you that you're not missing anything."

hilarious best man speech examples

16. "Hello everyone! I'm [Name]. I'm sure you all know me as (Name's best friend/sister/mum/dad), but if you don't, well done on sneaking into the wedding unnoticed!"

17. "Before I begin, I must explain that, this morning, [Name] asked me to remove anything resembling innuendo from my speech. Unfortunately, I didn't have time to go through it again, but if I come across anything risqué, I'll whip it out immediately."

18. "[Name] knows that I'm a bit nervous about this speech, and they gave me some great advice. They said 'Don't try to be too charming, witty or intellectual... just be yourself!'"

hilarious best man speech examples

19. "All of us gathered together in this room, we've got something really important in common - none of us have got a clue what I'm going to say next!"

20. "I was told that the secret to a good speech is to start with something that's relevant to everyone in the audience. So here it goes - all of your cars have been stolen."

21. "I want to start by saying that, of all the weddings I've attended over the years, this one is, by far, the most recent."

hilarious best man speech examples

22. "I'd like to start by congratulating [Name] on their excellent taste... in speakers."

23. "Before we start, can everybody do me a favour and get up off their seats? Now can everyone take one step backward, please? Now can everyone move one step to the right? And now can everyone move one step left? Thank you. Someone told me that the key to giving a good speech was to move people, but I think they must have been having me on, because this is going terribly!"

wedding speech opening lines funny opening lines sincere opening lines (9)

24. "I'm so happy to be overseeing the only five minutes of today that [bride or groom's Name] didn't plan. Only joking, they went over my speech with me at the bar half an hour ago. [Pulls extra page out of pocket] But I did manage to hide one page!"

25. Guys, before I start, just some housekeeping notes, the venue has asked that you don't stand on any of the chairs and tables for my standing ovation."

26 . I sincerely hope that each day of [Insert names] marriage is better than the the one before, the only thing is that also means they'll look back on today, their wedding day, and say that it was the worst day of their lives.

27. I’ve been worried about giving this speech for a while now. You'll be glad to hear, that last night I slept like a baby. I woke up every two hours, bawling my eyes out.

hilarious best man speech examples

28. Please keep clapping and cheering to a minimum. I’m terribly hungover. I know, you shouldn’t drink the night before a wedding, but I couldn’t very well let the groom/bride drink alone, could I?

29. Just some last messages here to read out: one from [NAME’S] football team for [PARTNER] " Apologies we couldn’t all be there today, good luck with [NAME], we found him/her to be useless in most positions, but wishing you all the best for tonight ."

30. Before I start ladies and gentlemen, let us observe a few moments of silence in memory of the 3,000 prawns, 250 chickens, and the many, many carnations, roses and wedding coordinators who selflessly gave their lives to make this wedding celebration possible.

Found your opening line for your wedding speech? We also have a handy checklist of people you need to remember to thank !

Image credits

Marc lawson photography, via one fab day, see more in:.

hilarious best man speech examples

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Best Man Speech: The Definitive Guide to Smashing it

by Catherine D July 12, 2019

Here’s all you need to deliver an incredible and unforgettable best man speech.

Congratulations!

You’ve just been awarded the highest honor a bro can receive.  You’re the best man! And that’s an honor greater than being knighted by the queen. But I’m sure you know what comes with it.

You’ll have to give that best man speech brosef!

Though, you won’t want to give just any speech off the top of your head that nobody is going to give a damn about.

Just remember what Uncle Ben said to Spidey, “With great power comes great responsibility”. It’s that serious, man.

You’ve probably seen best man speeches like this before. The guy stands up, hits the glass and says something, uninspired, about how he’s bros with the groom, congratulates the bride-to-be, and then sits down.

Or maybe you’ve seen another kind of speech, where the best man stands up and talks about nothing for 10+ minutes, putting you to sleep, because who even cares?

During a reception, there are about a million different things going on. People will forget the things that do not grab their attention, especially at a reception.

Everyone there is busy talking, eating, laughing, and will not care or even remember a boring speech in a few days. But not yours, my friend, you’re going to be the star of the day.

In this guide, we give you everything you need to know in sequence - from the writing process, all the way to delivering that wedding toast. Get your notepad ready for some very important tips on giving your wedding toast!

Writing the Best Man Speech

So How Do You Write the Best Man Speech?

The hardest part is always just getting started. Here are some basic tips on how to write a best man speech so that you can be prepared and dominate when the time comes.

Be Prepared and Plan Ahead

Practice makes perfect. Creating a fantastic speech doesn’t happen overnight.

If you’re going to wow the audience, you’ll need to make sure you’ve done everything you possibly can and covered every base - and man, that takes time.

Generally, 2-3 months is the right amount of time to give yourself when writing for a best man speech to account for the overall writing process and potential rewrites.

Considering all of the events that follow, like the bachelor party and the suit fitting, you’ll be too busy in those final moments to prepare a killer best man speech that’s even half decent.

Record Every Thought

You might be on the bus or in your car and think of an incredible quote or one-liner to say in your wedding toast, but our memories are very limited.

It’s difficult to remember what you even had for lunch two days ago, much less something you thought up some random time.

No matter where you are, record your thoughts. You could write in a journal, use your iPhone’s “Voice Memos” app or an app like Evernote . Scratch them onto a napkin, carve them into a stone near you, just get those wedding toast ideas down!

As long as you start capturing your thoughts, you’ll eventually reach a gold mine.

Think of this more as ‘capturing’ than ‘writing’. It’s easier to capture your raw best man speech ideas than banging your head on the wall trying to ‘write’ something from scratch.

How to Write a Best Man Speech Tip

Keep a Positive Tone

When it comes to the best man speech, the main thing to keep in mind is the goal of what you want to accomplish - celebrating the bride and groom. Here are some things to focus on:

  • Your best experiences with the groom.
  • How great a pair the bride and groom are.
  • The best qualities of the groom.
  • Possible first thoughts on the bride when they met (If they were good thoughts!)

Focus on the best of times, and further expand upon those points the best you can and maybe you can use those for a few wedding jokes!

With that in mind, here’s what not to say:

What Not to Talk About in Your Speech

While you may be writing to make your groom laugh, you need to remember your audience is diverse. You have children, elders, and teenagers so you wouldn’t want to write something inappropriate.

Generally, it’s best to avoid things like these:

  • Any previous relationships.
  • Anything about drugs, alcohol, gambling.
  • Perverse topics, or anything of a sexual nature.
  • Harsh negativity.
  • Inside jokes that are too specific.

The idea is to avoid anything raunchy or disheartening during your speech, even if it might be hilarious in your head, you’ll have to avoid it in your best man speech.

Think about how upset Grandma would be if you happened to talk about how her little Jimmy actually hasn’t been saving himself for marriage - what horror!

How Long Should a Best Man Speech Be?

So you have a great speech, and you’ve covered every single talking point that fit. Everyone’s going to love this, right?

Wrong! When writing a best man speech, you’ll want to keep it way, way shorter.

The problem is that what you wrote is almost 30 minutes long! No bueno amigo. Nothing on this Earth could keep people engaged in a wedding toast that long.

You’re not going for a ‘F.D.R. Repairing the American Psyche During The Great Depression’ type of speech. What you want is more like an ‘I Love You, Man’ speech.

It seems like everyone from everywhere throws out an arbitrary number ranging from 1-10 minutes, but really, research shows our attention span is even shorter than a goldfish .

Which means you have 8 seconds to make an impression . Let that sink in.

The best man speech is usually between meals at a reception. That means you have to make your mark - and get in what you have to say in a short time. Meaning that short best man speeches are perfectly fine, you don’t have to overthink it.

It can be 1 minute, it can be 5 minutes.  Keep the audience engaged in your speech and don’t ramble off unnecessarily.

How do you do that? Practice!

It’s All About Practice

You know, it’s okay to feel unsatisfied with what you wrote. After all, you’re not the most accomplished writer in the world. You just want to prepare a great best man speech and get back to Netflix binging.

The writing process can be tough, so here’s an ideal approach that most people use when writing the best material:

  • Write a few pages of content just to get the speech ideas out.
  • Realize that you’ve written a movie's worth of material.
  • Take what you really like.
  • Edit until you stop hating it.

Being intimidated serves no purpose.

Get Interviewed Bruh

If you’re not the best writer (or capturer), the previous steps might seem a little intimidating to you. That’s fine. Not everyone can put pen to paper as well as they’d like, and if that’s you, consider having a friend interview you!

Getting a friend or family member to interview you about your experiences with the groom is a great way of getting wedding speech ideas. Here are a few topics to get interviewed on:

  • Where did you meet?
  • Did you like each other at first?
  • When did you become bros?
  • What kind of crazy experiences did you have together?
  • What kind of bad qualities does he have?
  • What kind of good qualities does he have?

Answering these questions with a recording device can help you when you need to put the best man speech together, and you can recall things you might never have just by writing!

Be (Relatively) Sober

Even if you have a Wade Boggs alcohol tolerance, it’s best to keep the drinks to a minimum.

( The guy drank 64 beers on one cross country flight, what the hell? )

Having one or two drinks is fine if it helps calm the nerves, but any more will mess up any chance of giving a decent best man toast, and you’ll just look silly slurring your words or acting strangely. Remember, all eyes are on you during your best man speech.

Best Man Speech Jokes

Try Some Best Man Speech Jokes or Quotes

So suppose you’ve got your speech together, but you have a placeholder like:

[ Put a joke in here! ] in 3-4 spots, and you really have no idea what to put in there.

We got you covered.

Here are some best man speech opening lines you could work with and personalize for whatever you may need, because the opportunity for wedding jokes is a rare thing! These make great icebreakers to warm your audience up.

“Well, where do I even start? [Groom] is just incredible. He’s brilliant, funny, caring… Anyway, I can’t really read your handwriting [Groom], so just tell me whatever the rest was after.”

“[Bride], you really are an incredible woman. You deserve an absolutely incredible husband, so I’m not going to stop until I figure out what’s wrong here.”

“Thank you everyone for bearing with me, I Googled ‘best man speech jokes’ and every site asked for my credit card before showing me any examples, so here goes nothing.”

Best Man Speech Jokes Tip

“For those of you who know the bride, she’s really a wonderful woman who deserves a wonderful man. So good job, [Groom], for marrying her before she found one.”

“For anyone who finds this speech particularly not funny, I got all of my jokes from [Groom] so please, blame that guy.”

“Ladies and gentlemen, I wasn’t given a microphone tonight and I deeply apologize. To anyone in the back, If you hear silence at the front, be sure that you’re not missing anything.”

“Ladies and gentlemen, before I begin this speech I’d just like to say I am absolutely thrilled that I beat the bartender at rock-paper-scissors twenty minutes ago for the honor of best man.”

Best Man Speech Outline

Putting Together a Best Man Speech Outline

Now that you have an idea of how to write a best man speech, it’s just as important to know how to structure it. While there are canned free best man speech templates out there, it's really best to get a bird's eye view on what you want to say and create a structure that works for you personally. Don't just take any random free speech template from online and fire it up. Not every outline or template will work for your needs, so get a good idea of your vision first then begin to structure it.

Flow matters, and it’s the most important thing in putting together great best man speeches. Without good flow, you’ll lose the crowd and people won’t follow what you’re saying.

Best Man Speech Outline Tip

Here are some great ideas to nail the best man speech structure and make your speech shine.

The Introduction

The introduction needs to serve a single purpose: Getting people engaged! This is the key aspect of any best man speech formula.

The One-Liner Approach

An incredible one-liner is a great way of getting started. A good idea for this would be to roast the groom a little bit, he probably wouldn’t mind.

For example, what faults does he have? You can take advantage of that to make slight jabs at him.

Or you can even make fun of yourself in the process, what do you both suck at? Maybe you want to talk about that awkward mullet phase you both had in high school. Live it up!

The Congratulatory Approach

Alternatively, you can open by showing gratitude to:

  • The bride and groom, for bringing everyone together.
  • The guests, for attending this incredible event.
  • The parents of the bride and groom, for bringing them into this world.

This approach is a good option at the beginning. You can use it as a Plan B if you think you can’t gather an appropriate one-liner.

It’s easy to get lost in thought about what to follow up a good opener in a best man speech, but nothing is safer than a good story to engage your audience.

The idea is to create a connection to the groom and then present it to the guests.

Here are a few ideas to get you started:

  • Where you met the groom.
  • What makes him a great guy.
  • Crazy stories that show who he is.
  • Why he’s an excellent fit for the bride.
  • How he changed for the better after he met the bride.

Really, anything goes, and they’re all sure to keep people interested. Focus on the organic story of your friendship and don’t be robotic.

You’ll want to accomplish this in a way that stays kosher, though, avoiding unsavory details mentioned in our #4 tip.

Congratulate the Bride

So, you don’t have to do this, but we definitely encourage it. The issue is, not everyone really knows the bride. Honestly, maybe you met her a month ago, or a week ago.

Who knows, you could have met her literally just now. When your buddy gets hitched, it’s quite common to not really know the lady herself.

If this is true, you can handle this two ways:

Stick to something like:

“I knew she was a great fit for you the moment I saw you together”.

“She really is the perfect match for you dude.”

Sure the groom will know you barely know her, but whatever, if he really is your bro, he’ll appreciate that you’re saving face like this.

2. Avoid it.

Look, you’re the best man, it means the groom chose you, he knows you. Which means that he’s most likely expecting your best man speech to be about your experiences together, so keep the content focused around your relationship.

This means that it’s okay to avoid any mention of the bride after the first few words when writing a best man speech.

It works in most cases to just congratulate her in the intro, and then continue on with your speech avoiding her entirely.

This might sound a little underhanded, but it works, and most likely, the audience won’t notice.

If you know the bride, then speak about her.

If you’re just as close to the bride as you are to the groom, then you need to take all of the prior steps to make a compelling speech for the bride too, which won’t make the best man toast easy but hey, you don’t want to piss her off.

You could share a story about her too, or you can talk about one where the bride and groom shared with you, which is always a safe bet.

How to End Your Wedding Toast

Here’s where you wrap up your thoughts, and keep this part short, you don’t have to stress it too much.

It’s as easy as saying something like,

“Jack, Jill, to a lifetime of good health, love, and joy!”

There are a thousand different things you can say here, but the main idea is to keep the tone positive, upbeat, congratulate their love and wish the best for them.

NOTE: It is absolutely acceptable to keep a paper copy of your speech on hand because you’re not remembering your speeches like a world leader at the U.N. You’re just a guy who’s happy for his bro.

Best Man Speech Examples

Best Man Speech Examples

Even if you have everything else down, it’s always best to have some speech examples of how to tackle your wedding toast.

People have done it before you, so why go in blind? Here are some different types of best man speeches for unique scenarios you may want to try for your best man toast.

Funny Best Man Speech (Example)

“Hello Everyone, I’m John, I’m the best man, and if you find this speech unfunny, [Groom] and I have the same sense of humor, so please blame him.

I’m just joking, of course, I promised [Groom] I wouldn’t roast him too much today or talk about anything too weird, so I’ll just talk about the good parts of his character...

...Thank you, everyone, have a great evening.

But really, [Groom] and I have been friends since before I knew how even to tie my own shoelaces. He’s a brother to me, even more than my actual brother, sometimes.

Sorry, Alex.”

Best Man Speech Examples Tip

Emotional Best Man Speech (Example)

“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I’m the best man, Chris. [Groom] and I go way back, all the way from high school. Through the years, he’s grown from a pain in the ass, into a fine man.

[Groom] was always shy when it came to meeting new people, and that’s sorta hard to hear considering how a guy like that could be such a perfect match with [Bride]. But I can’t imagine him without you, because I’ve seen what it looked like.

[Bride], you are both so dear to me, please take care of [Groom], please keep him out of trouble.”

Short Best Man Speech (Example)

“Good evening, everyone, from the moment that [Groom] met [Bride], I knew that this was going to be something special.

The way you two talk to each other, you’re so alike sometimes that honestly, it kind of scares me.

But to quote Mark Twain, ‘To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.’ May your love be timeless.”

Hopefully these wedding toast examples give you ideas on how to model your own best man speech!

How to Give a Best Man Speech

The Presentation - Delivering the Best Man Speech

You have the writing and the flow down. Great! Most of the hard work is all done.

But don’t forget, you’re delivering a best man speech. And grand statements are always accompanied by excellent speech etiquette.

Here are some best man speech tips that’ll help you deliver, so that you don’t look like an uncomfortable 4th grader at a talent show your Mom forced you into.

Practice Your Speech on Camera

You’re noticing a trend, right? Practicing the actual delivery of the best man speech in front of a camera is a great way to see what poor and good habits you have.

And then, you need to keep practicing to eliminate the bad ones. For example, do you notice that you slump too much? Do you happen to mumble? Do you look down a lot?

Take note of all of these when you look at the recording and then try the speech again while mindfully avoiding bad habits and watching out for awkwardly delivered wedding jokes.

Practice in Front of People

Sure, using a camera is an excellent way to correct issues, but there’s nothing better than getting an outsider opinion.

Getting a spectator to sit and watch you deliver your best man toast lets someone tear into your bad habits without any bias. It may be painful, but this is what you want, and a larger group of people is best.

That way, when it’s time to give the best man speech, the concerns an audience member might have are already known to you.

How to Give a Best Man Speech Tip

The Honest Truth Man

Remember that a best man speech is a celebration of the love and joy that the bride and groom share. You don’t have to stress about every minor detail, because the audience isn’t (and they’ll most likely all be drunk anyway).

They’re already lightened up, and in the mood for a good few words, so why spend your time being nervous? It’s not worth it. Enjoy yourself up there and just deliver that crushing best man toast.

After it’s through, you can start drinking again, which is what you’ll probably want to do anyway.

Say what you have to say, and raise a toast to the bride and groom. Use this guide as a helpful resource and come back to it as many times as you need to ensure a totally awesome best man speech.

Best man speech tips

Good luck on your best man speech!

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Wedding invitations, follow this perfect best man speech: tips + examples.

Written by  Shutterfly Community Last Updated: Oct 12, 2018

You’ve been chosen as the best man. Congratulations! It’s a great feeling to know that your friend or relative wants you to take part as his right-hand man in one of the best days of his life.

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One of the most important duties as best man is the best man speech. Traditionally the speech is given during the reception before the guests eat. Whether you are great with public speaking or a little intimidated by standing in front of a large group, we have all the tools you need in order to be best prepared, so don’t sweat it.

hilarious best man speech examples

The Do’s and Don’ts For Preparing Your Best Man Speech

Don’t wing it..

Find a time a couple of months before the wedding to think about the things you want to talk about and write an outline. Most likely you’ll get caught up in best man activities with the groom and it will leave you with less time as the date approaches.

Do write a great intro.

The intro is the most important part of the speech because it grabs the audience’s attention. Try a funny one-liner, a story about you and the groom or even a compliment to his lovely new wife.

Don’t bring up past relationships.

Not only is it disrespectful to his wife but his wife’s family will also be there and will not want to hear about the groom’s litany of ex-girlfriends.

Do have a plan B.

Make sure you have the speech written down or outlined and have some jokes or points to cover if you are facing a tough crowd.

Don’t make negative jokes about marriage.

Even if you and the groom have an inside joke or if you have negative ideas about settling down, the audience doesn’t need to know. Also, don’t use curse words at any point during the speech, as you don’t know who in the audience you might offend.

Do practice.

Practice makes perfect. Going over the speech several times will ensure that you are comfortable with what you are saying and it will sound more natural.  Pro tip: record your speech on your phone’s voice memos and play back.

Don’t talk about the groom in compromising situations.

So you’ve seen the groom embarrass himself but you should keep that to yourself. You don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable or upset his wife.

Do congratulate the couple.

Make a toast, congratulate them and say what your wishes are for them in their new life.

Don’t make it longer than 7 minutes.

Although speeches are a fun part of the reception, making it too long can bore the hungry guests. If it’s a casual reception keep it to about three minutes, for a more formal setting seven minutes is more than enough time.

Do thank the guests.

As the groom’s right-hand man, make sure you thank everyone who attended and even the people working the event. It’s a nice gesture that will be appreciated.

A Simple Best Man Speech Outline

If you want a speech that is short, sweet and simple that is perfectly acceptable as well. This works well for smaller wedding receptions, weddings that will have more than two speakers or those that are a little more private. Following these simple steps will ensure a great and memorable speech:

  • Opening line
  • Introduce yourself
  • Talk about groom/Compliment bride
  • Propose a toast
  • Thank the couple

Short and simple speech

Since I have everyone’s attention I’d love to say a few words to this amazing couple sitting right in front of me. For those who don’t know me, I’m Ed. Mike’s closest friend and sidekick.  We’ve known each other for about 11 years and have been on many adventures together. During that time, I got to know him well and can honestly say, he is the most selfless and stand-up guy I’ve ever met. I am thrilled to be standing here and celebrating him and his beautiful bride, Linda.

I am sure this union between two honest and caring people makes you all smile. Let’s raise a glass for everlasting love! Thanks for making us all part of this beautiful day.

Best Man Speech Template

Typically, a best man speech should last about 4-7 minutes depending on the party. While short and sweet is welcomed, a best man speech can also include more details such as how you know the groom and the bride, funny jokes, heartfelt stories and your well wishes.

Whether you want your speech to make the crowd laugh or shed a little tear, you may be wondering how to get started. We’ve pointed out several tips in our template below. Remember, a speech should always come from the heart.

How to Write the Perfect Best Man Speech

1 Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen. It’s lovely to see some familiar faces. On behalf of the gorgeous bridesmaids and not so gorgeous groomsmen, we’d like to thank you all for coming. 2 It’s amazing to see how far people will travel for free cocktails.

3 For those who don’t know me, my name is Adam. I am the best man and Sam’s very best friend. It’s an honor to be here and to be part of such a beautiful event. 4 I met Sam 20 years ago. We grew up together as neighbors in San Diego and attended the same school all throughout college. 5 He was the nice kid on the block who would go home and do his homework while all of us were out doing, well, the things we shouldn’t be doing. Can you believe it took me two months to convince him to toilet paper Mrs. Carter’s house? Mrs. Carter isn’t here, is she?

Luckily, as we grew up, he started making better decisions; one of them being this very special day. He is marrying his best friend 6 and the most beautiful girl he’s ever laid eyes on. Sarah, he said this to me just the other night and I promise no more than three drinks were involved.

7 When Sam introduced us to Sarah , we knew right away she was the one. For starters, she made him get rid of that horrible, beer-stained couch that he had since college. That alone got our stamp of approval. But mostly, we saw how happy she made him and how every time he talked about her, he would have a huge smile. We started seeing a little less of him, but that’s okay because we were getting tired of buying his drinks anyway.

For that reason, and the reason we are all here today, 8 I’d like to raise a glass to Sam and Sarah. May you have the life you always dreamed of, continue to fight over the remote and cherish making beautiful memories together. Find joy in the small things like Portlandia and expensive coffee and may sparks continue to fly forever. 9 Thank you guys for allowing me to be part of this special day and for trusting me not to ruin this beautiful moment (phew!). I’d also love to give a huge thanks to the staff who have helped make this night memorable.

10 Cheers, everyone! Continue to have a great night and come hang out with me on the dance floor.

Always address the audience and welcome them.

A quick opening sentence to welcome guests helps everyone feel at ease.

Throw in a silly joke.

A wedding should be fun and enjoyable. A joke will help to break the ice.

Introduce yourself.

It’s best to not assume that everyone knows who you are. A short and simple introduction will allow everyone to get familiar with the wedding party.

Talk about how you know each other.

Whether you are a relative or friend, talk the audience through how you got to be a special person in the groom’s life.

Talk about groom’s personality.

Use this time to make a joke about the groom or share a sweet sentiment. Mention any sports, skills or funny stories that people will appreciate.

Compliment his bride.

Acknowledging the bride is a must, especially because she makes the groom so happy. A mention of her dress, personality or the first time you met her is ideal.

Talk a bit about them as a couple.

Share things you like about them as a couple. It helps the audience get to know their dynamic a little better and it will make the couple smile as well.

Give a toast.

Raise a glass and cheers to the new couple. Including a bit of tradition makes the speech much more special.

Thank the couple and staff.

Everyone spent a lot of time preparing for the special day. Make sure to thank the couple for allowing you to be part of it and the staff for making it all happen.

This closing allows for any sort of instruction such as dancing, dessert or simply to tell them to enjoy the party.

Best Man Speech for Brother

Good evening, hope everyone is having a good time tonight. I feel very privileged and honored to be standing here tonight celebrating this lovely union. Two years ago, Matt gave the best man speech at my wedding and made a lot of awkward jokes. So needless to say, I’ve been waiting for this moment for a really long time! For those who don’t know, I am Matt’s brother, Mike. I first met Matt when I was two years old at our parent’s house in Boston. To be quite honest, I wasn’t thrilled because I really wanted a sister. And I think he knew because Matt would do ridiculous things like throw my toothbrush in the toilet, pour water at me when I was asleep and run across the room naked when I had any friends over. This made me less popular than I already was.

Matt always excelled in school, was captain of the debate team (apologies to Cara, but he can argue his way out of anything!) and can make a mean steak. The truth is, despite him being an annoying brother at the time, I came out winning in the end. Because of him and this beautiful night, I am getting the sister I always wanted. Cara, you’re beautiful and our family loves you so much. Thank you for making my brother so happy.

Let’s celebrate this amazing union and raise a glass to the newlyweds! On behalf of the groomsmen and bridesmaids, we’d like to wish you a life full of love, happiness, and joy.

To everyone who made tonight happen, thank you. You’ve made this night very special.

Sentimental Best Man Speech

If I can have your attention everybody, I’d like to say a few words. Thank you all for being here to celebrate this lovely couple. Now I would like you all to take out some tissues, because you are going to need them after this. For those of you who have not met me I am Rich, Joe’s best man. Rich and I have known each other for over 30 years, we met when we were both just two years old. We lived on the same street and our mothers were friends so naturally we also became friends.

I am an only child so Joe was like a brother to me. We became inseparable. We played in T-ball together and then graduated on to baseball throughout high school. When we weren’t throwing the ball we were skateboarding, watching movies or challenging each other in video games.

Joe was always hanging out at my house and I grew up thinking he was just part of the family. I remember asking my mom why Joe never goes home and mom would always say “Rich, Joe is the brother you never had, take good care of each other.”

What my mom didn’t tell me at the time was that Joe’s mom was really sick and his dad worked double shifts just to stay afloat with all the medical bills. So, having Joe around was our way of helping out.

Even though we were only in high school, Joe made it very clear that he wanted to have a wife and family of his own. His mother’s death at such a young age was really challenging and in some ways, he learned to cherish the women he had in his life more.

He knew he wanted a strong, nurturing and kind woman to be his wife. When Joe met Sarah he almost broke it off with her because he was afraid of losing her. I remember Joe coming to me and saying, “I’m in trouble, I’ve met the one but don’t know what to do.” “Scared is good”, I said, “It means you won’t mess this up”.

Sarah’s greatest strength comes from losing her father to cancer at a young age. When Joe and Sarah met, their commonalities bonded them immediately. Both missing the connection with their parents and understanding each other’s experiences brought them very close. I’ve never seen two people more meant for each other. From the moment they met in college, there has been an incredible and magical bond.

When I look at both of you I can see how your experiences have led you to one another. It’s as if your parents were orchestrating this all along. Even though your parents are not here with us tonight, they are in spirit and will continue to guide you in the right direction and are so very proud of you.

As we all gather here to enjoy this dinner tonight, I’d like to make a toast to Joe and Sarah. Two souls meant to meet and fall in love. I want you to know that mom misses you hanging out at the house and she told me to tell you that you are always welcome in her home.

Joe, thank you for being my friend and brother all these years. You are the very best friend a guy could ever have and I love you so much.

Sarah, Thank you for loving this great man and for taking Joe to be your husband. I know you both will take care of each other and keep the memories of your parents alive together.

Now that our napkins need replacing, I’d like to thank all the staff and event coordinators for taking care of this beautiful event.

Cheers to everyone, enjoy your night and if you have a chance, come find me and say hi.

Funny Best Man Speech

Ladies and gentlemen if I can have your attention for a few moments, I would like to give a toast to Mark and Melissa. I was a little surprised that Mark asked me to be his best man, after all, he knows how much I love to embarrass him. I’m thinking, “what a great time to leave a lasting impression of who Mark really is” in front of all his closest friends and family. If for some reason you did not know, Mark was chosen as the class clown in high school. He even got his picture immortalized in our class yearbook for this very title. Let me tell you, having Mark as a best friend was very entertaining!

He was always laughing, pulling pranks, and sometimes getting us in trouble (I certainly won’t tell them how we barely made it out of jail because you thought streaking through the grocery store parking lot was a good dare). We all had a bit of clowning around within us, but the one thing Mark always had over any of us was his way of making girls laugh. And I mean really laugh, not just a quick chuckle but downright laugh out loud, spit-up-your-drink kind of laugh. While we were all worried about how we looked to girls, Mark’s concern was always how to make them crack up. I remember Mark saying “how come you get all the girls and I don’t?” I never had a straight answer for him. Looking back now though, my track record only lasted a few months and for Mark? Well, what he didn’t know was that his “clowning around” was preparing him for the show of his life.

When Mark introduced me to Melissa I knew she was special. I knew this was who Mark was going to marry. She not only has a very infectious laugh, but she gets Mark to laugh just as much.

They say a marriage can’t truly survive without laughter and I don’t believe there will be a shortage of that with these two. Mark, remember when you asked me why you don’t get all the girls? Well, the answer is right there next to you. While you were out figuring out jokes and funny one-liners, Melissa was saving up for the greatest show on earth!

If anyone tells you that you’re a bunch a clowns just smile and say….who’s got the last laugh now? Let’s raise our glass to Mark and Melissa! Here’s to a lifetime of love and laughter! You are both class acts and I am proud to call you my best friends. I love you both very much and thank you for having me here.

To all who were in charge of organizing this awesome night, great job on making this wedding shine. I challenge everyone to a dance-off later tonight.

Hopefully these tips will have you on your way to writing a heartfelt speech. If you still need a little more inspiration, don’t forget to check out our wedding quotes . These are great to incorporate into your speech, write in a card or simply share as advice to the newlyweds.

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hilarious best man speech examples

Great Short & Sweet Best Man Speech Examples

Writing a best man speech can be daunting, to say the least. However, it doesn’t have to be. By sticking with our short best man speeches method, you can say what needs to be said and still impress and be funny. And the good news is it only takes is a few minutes, and then you can breathe again and enjoy the day!

A Quick Reminder On What Makes a Great Speech

Bride and groom clicking champagne glasses during wedding toast

A great speech will always include the essentials. An intro that’s appreciated, heartfelt words, a few jokes, and the right kind of toast are just the beginning. Here are a few tips for writing a great best man toast .

8 Tips to Improve Your Speech Writing

  • First, introduce yourself and thank everyone for coming
  • Talk about your relationship with the groom after a short introduction of yourself.
  • Thank everyone for organizing the event.
  • If anyone has sent messages but cannot be there that day, read them.
  • Poke fun at the groom a bit by sharing a funny story.
  • Compliment the bride and say something about the bridesmaid.
  • Offer a bit of advice to the married couple. Something funny is great, here.
  • Then, offer up a sincere toast to the newlyweds.
  • When you are done, present the next speaker for the evening. Finally, take your seat.

Short and Sweet Best Man Speech Examples

Funny and upbeat.

“Good evening everyone! Let’s lift our glasses and toast to the newlyweds!

Don’t worry, your arms won’t get tired. My speech is going to be like a mini-skirt: long enough to cover the essentials and short enough to hold your attention.

[Groom], thank you for being such a stable force in my life, a great friend and an even better brother. [Bride], I think we can all agree that you’re stunning this evening and [Groom] won the lottery.

[Bride] & [Groom], tonight we celebrate you. We all wish you a lifetime of happiness, love, health, success, and laughter. May you continue to find humor in the bad and appreciation for the good. May your friendship continue to grow throughout all the years to come. Cheers!”

Brother’s Funny & Short Best Man Speech

Here’s an example of a brother of the groom that hates public speaking giving a best man speech in under 3 minutes. Yes! It’s possible. He got in a few funny things about the groom and well wishes and wrapped it up.

Heartfelt and Personal

“Hello, everyone, I am Brad. You may not know me, but Keith and I go way back, since college, in fact. We have been mischief makers together since the very start.

But despite our best efforts, today has gone off without a hitch. A special thanks to everyone who made today possible. I have a few words to read from well-wishers who could not join us here today (read off messages sent from people who could not attend).

Well, their kind words are right. Keith is a heck of a guy. I guess I first knew that on the day we met. There he was, already in our dorm room, doing his best to find himself a girl on campus. And he had only been there a few hours! Really, his pursuits in this avenue were largely less than successful.

That was until he met Maddie. And thank goodness for that. Keith, I hate to tell you this, but I have seen your ex-girlfriends, and I certainly think the best woman won out. Or, at least the most beautiful, at any rate. She looks stunning today. So, too, do the bridesmaids. If any of them are interested, I can give them my number after this is over.

I would like to offer you both a bit of advice today, as you start this new journey together. Keith, always treats Maddie like the queen that she is. And Maddie, always remembers that Keith loves you and could not do it without you. Seriously, I have seen him without you. And that was a mess.

But, seriously, I wish you all best. You are both near and dear to me. Your life together is sure to be a fantastic new chapter for both of you. Now, if you would all join me to give a toast to Luke and Maddie.”

Hilarious Best Man Speech – Kills it in Under 6 Minutes

Simple & to the Point

“Good Evening. My name is (Best Man) and on behalf of (Groom and Bride), I would like to thank you for attending this blessed event today! I have the honor of acting as Best Man tonight and am thrilled that I am with these two wonderful people as they begin this new chapter in their lives.

 (Bride and Groom) have each walked many miles to be here together today, and this wedding is a joy to behold. I can speak for everyone in this room when I say we all wish you the happiness that you deserve. We are so glad that you have found one another, and this day is a reminder that the best is yet to come. Congratulations, (Bride and Groom)!”

Short Best Man Speech with Some Great One-Liners

If you’re looking for some great one-liners for your best man speech check this out.

“Everyone – please raise your champagne and join me in a toast to Melanie and Howard. As I begin this wedding toast one of the first thoughts that pop into my mind is… if I’m the best man… then why is Melanie getting married to Howard? I guess because today, I am just an average man and Howard is the best man.

In my considerable research to learn how to deliver an incredible best man speech, I quickly realized that in my toast I am expected to sing the praises of our groom and tell you what a wonderful guy Howard is. Unfortunately, I’m a terrible singer and an even worse liar.

Howard… Melanie is a kind, beautiful, and a good-hearted person who deserves a great husband. Thank goodness you stole her heart before she found one. All kidding aside – my heart is filled with so much love, respect, and admiration for my dear friend, Howard. I am beyond honored to be standing here today in front of you in the role of his best man… I love you both and wish you many years of happy marriage. Can’t wait to see what this world has in store for you both. Cheers!”

Short & Sweet With Blessings

“Ladies and gentlemen. I met John in 1990. We have been friends for over 17 years. In that time, he has proven himself to be not only a great friend but a truly good man as well. I value my friendship with John and I look forward to having the same great friendship with his lovely new bride Katherine.

I know one important thing about Katherine. She has made John happier than I have ever seen him. Today is a day of joy and happiness for all of us. But it is not just a day… it’s the very special beginning of a new life between John and Katherine. I wish you both health and happiness and may God bless your marriage.”

Best Man Speech Examples

The best man speech is usually the most eagerly awaited of all the wedding speeches. Traditionally the best man speech comes last and you’ll want to pack it with jokes, embarrassing stories about the groom and some lovely words for the wedding party. We’ve got a huge selection of real best man speeches to use as examples and loads of ideas and advice articles too!

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Peyton manning stole the show at tom brady's roast, share this article.

Earlier this month, former NFL quarterback Peyton Manning made a surprise appearance at “The Roast of Tom Brady,” an event that was broadcast on Netflix. 

Manning’s five-minute monologue was arguably the best part of the roast, featuring good-natured jabs throughout. 

“It is great to be here with a bunch of people sitting around, talking smack about Tom Brady,” Manning said. “Or as we call that in the Manning family, Thanksgiving.”

Another highlight: “Of course, we all know Tom has five more Super Bowl rings than I do,” Manning said. “He also has more touchdowns than I do. More passing yards. More retirements. More fake hair. More TB12 bankruptcies.”

Peyton obviously had to mention Eli, too. 

“One thing that Tom and I definitely have in common, though, is our love of the game of golf,” Manning said. “And listen, not to brag — we’re both pretty good players. My handicap is a 6.4. While Tom’s handicap is blowing leads in the Super Bowl to my brother Eli.” 

Manning was the last person to roast Brady and he was given the honor of inviting the QB to defend himself. Even that was a highlight. 

“He is a three-time Super Bowl loser,” Manning said. “Please welcome, Tom Brady!”

Brady was quick to clap back at all of his roasters, including Manning. 

“I know sometimes you live in Denver, and sometimes you live in Louisiana,” Brady said. “But you will always live in my shadow.”

Check out some of the reactions from social media below.

El Roast a Tom Brady en Netflix en vivo, Peyton Manning vs Tom Brady una vez mas. Brady saco todo de su ronco pecho #TomBradyRoast pic.twitter.com/Ry8nGiYnXr — Fernando Von Rossum (@fvonrossum) May 6, 2024
“Please welcome three time Super Bowl loser, Tom Brady” -Peyton Manning introducing Tom Brady at ‘The Roast of Tom Brady’ 🤣🤣🤣 — Aaron F (@Aaronthewild) May 6, 2024
This Tom Brady roast has me rolling. Peyton Manning came ready. — Ari (@nflwithari) May 6, 2024
THEY JUST BROUGHT OUT PEYTON MANNING OUT FOR THR TOM BRADY ROAST🔥🔥 — Emmanuel (@e_kamia) May 6, 2024
Finally watched the Tom Brady roast. Top 3 roasters in no order: Bill Belichick🐐, Peyton Manning, Nikki Glaser. All the roast needed was Antonio Brown up there — Arjun Menon (@arjunmenon100) May 8, 2024
THEY BROUGHT OUT PEYTON MANNING ON THE TOM BRADY ROAST!!!!!!!!!!!! — SSJ Rosé EJ 🌊🌊 (@Keyztothecity__) May 7, 2024
Tom Brady roast was lots of fun. Highlights were Nikki Glazer, Bill Belichick, and Peyton Manning. Kevin Hart also did a good job hosting. Lowlights were Ben Affleck and Gronk. Yikes were they not good. But all the dumb Gronk jokes everybody made were really funny — James J 🐢 (@VanWinkle2112) May 6, 2024
The Tom Brady roast was fantastic. Way better than I expected. No one went easy on him. Honestly shocked he did it. Bill Belichick and Peyton Manning being there was great. Ben Affleck was the only roaster who totally bombed. — Clay Travis (@ClayTravis) May 6, 2024
Peyton Manning on the Roast of Tom Brady special>>>> — SICCY 🤪 (@Nickrod1998) May 7, 2024
The Tom Brady roast really is the best ever. Favorites were Bill Bellichick, Peyton Manning, Tony Hinchcliffe, Nikki Glazer, Drew Bledsoe, Andrew Schulz Ben Affleck was the worst, followed by Ron Burgundy. Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura were awful. Kevin Hart was a great host! — William (@KingWilliamENG) May 7, 2024
Peyton Manning on the @NetflixIsAJoke @TomBrady roast! Whatcha think? #tombradyroast pic.twitter.com/QehVk4QpvI — Broncos Fans PNW (@BroncosFansPDX) May 12, 2024
Peyton manning absolutely roasted Mac jones and bailey zappe with that line in the roast of Tom Brady 😂🤣😂 — Mágico (@Edmjosh4) May 11, 2024

Manning and Brady had a fierce rivalry on the field during their playing days but they were (and remain) close friends off the field. Manning was the perfect choice to close out Brady’s roast.

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IMAGES

  1. 11+ Best Man Speech Examples

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  2. Best Man Speeches

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  3. 33 Genuinely Funny Best Man Speech Jokes

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  4. 30 Best Man Speech Examples, Tips & Structure 2024

    hilarious best man speech examples

  5. 30 Best Man Speech Examples, Tips & Structure 2024

    hilarious best man speech examples

  6. 33 Genuinely Funny Best Man Speech Jokes

    hilarious best man speech examples

VIDEO

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  6. Better than stand up comedy🤣 #youtubeshorts

COMMENTS

  1. 42 Hilarious Best Man's Speech Jokes

    6) I just heard there was a competitive sweepstake on the length of the Best Man's speech. I put my money on 45 minutes, so settle in…. 7) My name is James and I am the Best Man. Many of you would beg to differ, but you'd do well to keep quiet - I know your secrets. 8) I'd like to congratulate the Groom on a truly magnificent speech.

  2. The 50 Best Jokes For Your Best Man Speech

    As the best man, you're tasked with giving the toast—maybe the most famous one of the evening. For the big speech, it's important to have some jokes scattered throughout. The couple gets to be sentimental. Her father gets to be sad and nostalgic. You need to bring the funny like it's showtime at the Apollo. That's no easy task, either.

  3. Funny Best Man Speech Jokes: 45 Hilarious Jokes

    45 of the Funniest Best Man Jokes for Speech. 1. It's been an emotional day, even the cake is in tiers. 2. If there's anybody here this afternoon who's feeling nervous, apprehensive and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead, it's probably because you've just married [NAME]. 3.

  4. 80 Hilarious Jokes for Best Man Speech (And How to Deliver Them

    So, Scott, here's my advice to you; as a married man, there are three phrases you must master: "Yes, dear," "I'm sorry" and "You're right.". Memorizing those words will save you a lot of heartache, Scott. Remember, marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband. 3.

  5. The Ultimate Best Man Speech Guide (Examples And Templates Included)

    A best man speech should be short and sweet, but not too short, and not too long. A happy medium is about 5-6 minutes in length. You don't want it to be shorter than 3 minutes as it may seem too brief. The point is to keep the audience engaged, and deliver a few anecdotes, thank the bride and groom, and raise a toast.

  6. Funny Best Man Speech Example

    This best man speech example is one for the books. Sam had the crowd laughing with his perfect mix of humour and delivery while wrapping up his speech with a...

  7. Spicy & Funny Best Man Speech Template

    Speech duration: 10 - 12 minutes. Speech style: Medium, spicy and hilarious. Note: This funny Best Man speech template uses the name 'Tom' for the Groom, Sarah for the Bride, 'Ben' for the Best Man and other example names. Insert the names for your group as needed.

  8. Funny Best Man Speeches That Can Be Adapted

    Good afternoon, Ladies and Gents. For those of you who don't know me, my name is Jason and I'm stood up here to say a few words. But first of all, Paul, thanks for agreeing to be my Groom today. And thank you, Linda, for allowing Paul to agree. The handwritten note of permission was a touch of class.

  9. Best Man Speech Jokes And Tips To Write Speech

    Poke some funny best-man speech jokes at the groom. Readout messages and well wishes from the absent guests, if any. Close with a romantic, a poetic, a few famous lines, or a poem. Propose a toast; Good Jokes For Best Man: Etiquette Tips. While there are no specific rules for good best-man speech jokes, there are some unspoken practices to ...

  10. Best Man Speech: How-To Guide, Examples, Tips & Jokes

    Choose Best Man speech quotes that reflect the couple's personality, add humor, and keep them relevant. Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop. H. L. Mencken. Marriage is a workshop where husband works and wife shops. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

  11. Best Man Speech: The Ultimate Guide (5 Examples & Templates)

    Speech 1. "Hi, my name is [Best Man], the best man and the groom's best friend. I would like to thank [Groom] for choosing me to be his best man if for no other reason than that he's finally admitting that I am the best. We've enjoyed a long and competitive friendship, ever since meeting in the third grade.

  12. Best Man Speech: How to Write, Free Template, Examples & Tips

    6. Propose a toast. Finally, close out your best man speech with a heartfelt toast. Ask everyone to raise a glass and provide well wishes to the newly married couple. Steal this wedding toast: "Everyone, please join me in raising a glass to such a wonderful couple. I wish you a lifetime of peace, love and happiness.

  13. How To Write A Killer Best Man Speech (With Templates)

    A best man's speech traditionally takes place at the wedding reception after the maid of honor gives her speech. The best man's speech should be positive, respectful, and congratulatory. It can last 3 to 5 minutes and should focus on a central theme or story about the groom. Remember, a best man speech is not the time to "wing it."

  14. Best Man Speech Guide w/ Examples

    3 Examples of Funny Best Man Speeches. Relieve a bit of the pressure from creating a chuckle-inducing best man speech using these three examples below as inspiration. Whether you focus on the bride a bit or pick out the most embarrassing story of the groom, you know, some solid one-liners scattered throughout your sentiments will get the job ...

  15. HOW TO WRITE A BEST MAN SPEECH: GUIDE, EXAMPLES, TIPS & JOKES

    First, it is important to keep the speech short and sweet. The best man speech should be no more than 3-5 minutes long. Second, focus on telling a few personal stories about the groom that will make the guests laugh. Third, conclude the speech with a sincere toast to the happy couple.

  16. Funny Best Man Speech Examples

    Being asked to be a Best Man at your friend's wedding is a huge honor and responsibility. Certainly, planning the bachelor party will be the thing you enjoy the most, and delivering the best man speech may spark nerves and fear. With so many different things to handle the range of feelings and emotions can be a little like a roller coaster.

  17. 30 Best Funny Opening Lines for Wedding Speeches

    If you've read our post on how to make a great best man speech, you'll know that we recommend starting with a joke, and here, we're sharing 30 foolproof examples!The beauty of this list is that it works for any wedding speech, whether you're a groom, bride, best man, bridesmaid, groomsman, bridesman, groomsmaid, father of the bride, father of the groom, mother of the bride, mother of the groom ...

  18. Best Man Speech: The Definitive Guide to Smashing it

    Let that sink in. The best man speech is usually between meals at a reception. That means you have to make your mark - and get in what you have to say in a short time. Meaning that short best man speeches are perfectly fine, you don't have to overthink it. It can be 1 minute, it can be 5 minutes.

  19. 30 Brilliant Best Man Speech Opening Lines

    30 Brilliant Best Man Speech Opening Lines. Whether you're after a formal best man speech introduction, some funny lines to warm up the room or a few best man speech openers to preface some sentimental stories, we've got something to suit you. Choose between sweet, sentimental, sarcastic, sassy and more! 1. Last Minute Best Man Opener

  20. 5 Best Man Speech Examples (For Brothers and Friends)

    Speech 1 (Funny) Good evening everyone. My name is Zak, and my long-time friend Scott had the good sense to make me his best man. They say good things come to those who wait, and for Scott that is certainly true. He had to wait until his freshman year in college to meet the best and most modest friend he'll ever have (and in case it isn't ...

  21. Follow This Perfect Best Man Speech: Tips + Examples

    Best Man Speech Template. Typically, a best man speech should last about 4-7 minutes depending on the party. While short and sweet is welcomed, a best man speech can also include more details such as how you know the groom and the bride, funny jokes, heartfelt stories and your well wishes.

  22. Great Short & Sweet Best Man Speech Examples

    Brother's Funny & Short Best Man Speech. Here's an example of a brother of the groom that hates public speaking giving a best man speech in under 3 minutes. Yes! It's possible. He got in a few funny things about the groom and well wishes and wrapped it up. ... Hilarious Best Man Speech - Kills it in Under 6 Minutes. Simple & to the ...

  23. Best Man Speech Examples

    Instead of one liners that have been heard before. But each to their own. By hitched.co.uk, 13/10/2018. Best Man Speech Examples. Speech by Richard. Fifth and last speech, I've edited to be closer to what I said as I made changes on the fly. By hitched.co.uk, 30/08/2018. Best Man Speech Examples. Speech by Adam.

  24. NFL: Peyton Manning's funny speech highlighted Tom Brady's roast

    One of the best moments of Tom Brady's roast was Peyton Manning's funny surprise ... But all the dumb Gronk jokes everybody made were really funny — James J (@VanWinkle2112) May 6, 2024.