phd personal statement computer science

Personal Statement Examples for Graduate School: Computer Science

Crafting a Standout Computer Science Personal Statement

Crafting a compelling personal statement is crucial for graduate school acceptance. Successful statements showcase your academic and professional accomplishments. They also put a spotlight on your personality, goals, and motivations. When you master this process can make your application stand out and secure your place in graduate school. That’s where our expertise comes into play. Our expertise is here to guide you through the graduate application complexities, providing insights, guidance, and feedback to enhance your writing and engage admissions committees.

Successful Personal Statement Examples for Graduate School

In this post, we’re excited to open our collection of personal statement examples for graduate school. We’re sharing two that students just like you used to get into graduate Computer Science programs:

Both essays, while strong in their current form, nevertheless offer learning opportunities on how further refinement can enhance clarity, coherence, and impact. Our commentary on these pieces provides actionable advice on how to approach revisions, ensuring that each paragraph serves a clear purpose and contributes to the overall narrative effectively.

Explore our graduate school personal statement examples and feedback to grasp the detailed analysis and attention that perfects a statement. Whether starting your draft or finalizing revisions, our insights will help you showcase your strengths, improve weaknesses, and express your future vision.

Finally, remember that a great personal statement does not just happen—it is crafted. Let us guide you through this process, offering the expertise and feedback necessary to turn a good personal statement into an outstanding one. Explore our blog for more tips, examples , and professional guidance on making your graduate application journey a success.

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Computer Science Personal Statement (Guide + Examples!)

Applying to study computer science can be quite a complicated programs. There are so many programs out there with so many application requirements. But don’t worry, we’re here to help.

In this blog post, we’ll give you some tips on how to write a computer science personal statement that will increase your chances of getting accepted into the program of your choice.

Table of Contents

What Is a computer science personal statement?

A computer science personal statement is a document that you submit as part of your application to study computer science.

In this statement, you’ll need to talk about your motivation for wanting to study computer science, as well as your skills and experience . This is your chance to sell yourself to the admissions committee and demonstrate why you’re the perfect candidate for their program.

Anatomy of a personal statement

Now that we’ve covered what a computer science personal statement is, let’s take a look at what it should include.

1. Introduction

Your computer science personal statement should start with a brief introduction . In this section, you’ll want to introduce yourself as a computer science applicant and explain why you’re interested in studying computer science. This is your chance to grab the attention of the admissions committee and make them want to read on.

2. Your motivation for wanting to study computer science

In this section, you’ll need to explain your motivation for wanting to study computer science. What is it about computer science that interests you? What are your long-term career aspirations? This is your chance to sell yourself to the admissions committee and demonstrate your commitment to the subject.

3. Your skills and experience

In this section, you’ll need to talk about your skills and experience . What computer science-related courses have you taken? Do you have any industry experience? This is your chance to show the admissions committee that you have the skills and experience necessary to succeed in their program.

4. Conclusion

Your computer science personal statement should end with a brief conclusion . In this section, you’ll want to restate your motivation for wanting to study computer science and reiterate your commitment to the subject. This is your chance to leave a lasting impression on the admissions committee.

Who reads my computer science personal statement?

The computer science personal statement is read by the admissions committee of the computer science department to which you’re applying.

This committee is made up of professors and industry professionals who are experts in the field of computer science. They will use your personal statement to determine whether or not you’re a good fit for their program.

Usually, the admission review process includes several rounds, and your computer science personal statement will be read by multiple members of the admissions committee.

How long should my computer science personal statement be?

Your computer science personal statement should be between 500 and 1000 words . This is enough space for you to introduce yourself, talk about your motivation for wanting to study computer science, and discuss your skills and experience.

Speaking in pages, your computer science personal statement should be one to two pages long . If your personal statement is longer than that, the admissions committee is likely to skim it, or even worse, not read it at all.

What should I include in my computer science personal statement?

There are a few things you will want to include in your computer science personal statement. In general, you should provide the admissions committee with convincing motivation and evidence that will portray you as someone both passionate and promising as a future computer science student.

Some things that you may want to include in your computer science personal statement are:

• Source of motivation for studying computer science
• Evidence of programming or quantitative abilities
• Competitions/olympiads
• Relevant work experience
• Relevant projects
• Accomplishments
• Future career aspirations

Your personal statement may also include other information that you feel is important for the admissions committee to know about you. However, make sure that whatever you include is relevant to computer science and will help you stand out as a strong candidate.

What should I not write in my computer science personal statement?

There are a few things you’ll want to avoid including in your computer science personal statement. First, avoid repeating information that is already available in your application . The admissions committee will already have access to your transcripts, test scores, and resume, so there’s no need to include this information in your personal statement.

Second, avoid including information that is not relevant to computer science . The admissions committee is looking for evidence that you’re passionate about computer science and have the skills and experience necessary to succeed in their program, so including information about your hobbies or extracurricular activities may not be the best way to go forward.

An exception to this is if you’re including information about extenuating circumstances that have impacted your academic performance, in which case you should briefly explain how these circumstances have affected you and why you’re still a strong candidate for their program.

Finally, avoid using cliches, quotes, or formulas in your computer science personal statement . The admissions committee is looking for an original and authentic voice, so be sure to write in your own words.

Tips on writing a top-notch computer science personal statement

Now that we’ve gone over what to include and what not to include in your computer science personal statement, let’s talk about how you can write a top-notch personal statement.

First, start by brainstorming a list of your computer science-related experiences, skills, and accomplishments . This will give you a good starting point for your personal statement and help you determine what information is most relevant to include.

As you’re drafting your computer science personal statement, be sure to keep the following tips in mind:

• Write in clear, concise, and easy-to-understand language
• Use active voice
• Be honest and authentic
• Personalize your statement to the program you’re applying to
• Proofread your statement for grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors

By following these tips, you can write a computer science personal statement that is sure to impress the admissions committee and increase your chances of getting into your dream program.

Computer science personal statement examples

Now that we’ve covered the basics of what a computer science personal statement should include, let’s take a look at some computer science personal statement examples.

“I have been programming since I was 12 years old, and ever since then I have been fascinated by the possibilities that computer science offers. I am motivated by the idea of being able to create something from scratch and see it come to life, and I know that computer science will allow me to do just that. In addition, I have experience in working with code from different languages, which has taught me how to think critically and solve problems. My skills in critical thinking and problem solving are essential for studying computer science, as they will allow me to tackle complex challenges head-on.

Apart from my skills and experience, I am also passionate about learning new things. This is why during my free time I volunteered for Code for America, where I worked with a team of designers and developers to build a civic engagement platform. This experience showed me the importance of collaboration when it comes to creating something amazing, and it solidified my belief that teamwork is key to success.

Another project I got involved with was the development of a computer game for blind children. This project was important to me because it allowed me to use my skills for something good, and it also showed me how computer science can be used to create inclusive technologies.

Last year, I also had the opportunity to intern at Lyft, where I worked on a team that developed a new feature for the Lyft app. This experience was invaluable, as it gave me insights into the inner workings of one of the world’s most successful companies. It also showed me how computer science can be used to solve real-world problems.

Ultimately, I believe that I would be an excellent candidate for your computer science program because of my passion for the field combined with my skills and experience. I am confident that I have what it takes to succeed in computer science, and I hope to use my skills and knowledge to make a difference in the world.”

“I have always been interested in the way computers work and how they can be used to solve problems. This interest began when I was very young and has continued to grow as I have gotten older. My father is a computer scientist, so I have been exposed to computer science my entire life. In high school, I took several computer science courses and really enjoyed them. I also competed in several programming competitions and did well in them. In the following essay, I want to highlight my accomplishments as a computer science candidate and express my passion for this exciting field.

I am a computer science major at *NAME* University. I have taken several computer science courses and have gotten exceptional grades. My favorite course so far has been Introduction to Algorithms, for which I worked as a teaching assistant during my third year. I also competed in the Association for Computing Machinery International Collegiate Programming Contest, and our team placed in the top 100 out of 6,000 teams worldwide. This experience showed me that I have the ability to solve complex problems and work well under pressure.

As a student, I also worked as a part-time research assistant in the AI and Robotics laboratory, where I assisted in the development of a computer vision system for an autonomous robot. This experience allowed me to develop my skills in programming and computer science. In addition, I have also been a member of the Student Senate and have served on the Executive Board of the Student Government Association. These experiences have allowed me to develop leadership skills and learn how to work with others.

I am interested in computer science because it is a field that is constantly changing and evolving. There are always new problems to solve and new ways to solve them. I find this challenge exciting and invigorating. I am also interested in computer science because it is a field that combines creativity with logic. I enjoy using both my creative and logical sides when solving problems.

I am applying to your program specifically because I believe that it will allow me to further develop my skills in computer science. I am looking forward to taking classes from renowned professors and working with other talented students. I believe that your program will provide me with the skills and knowledge that I need to become a successful computer scientist.”

“Computers have always been a part of my life. As a toddler, I would watch my father work on computer programs for his business. Fascinated by the blinking cursor on the screen, I would ask him what he was doing and how it worked. My parents bought me my first computer when I was in grade school and I taught myself how to program in BASIC.

Since then, computer science has been my passion. I have pursued every opportunity to learn more about it, including taking computer science courses in high school and college and working as a research assistant for a computer science professor. I am excited to continue learning about computer science at the graduate level and to pursue a career in this field.

One of my biggest accomplishments in the field of computer science so far has been developing a computer program that can generate 3D models of human faces. This program has the potential to be used in a variety of applications, such as video game development, computer-aided design, and even law enforcement. I am currently working on submitting this program to a computer science conference for publication.

I have also been involved in a number of extracurricular activities related to computer science. I am a member of the Association for Computing Machinery and the Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers. I have also volunteered my time to teach computer science to elementary and middle school students through a local program called Girls Who Code.

Besides this, I have worked on several personal coding projects of my own. For example, I created a computer program that can solve Sudoku puzzles by using a technique called constraint satisfaction. I also developed a website for a local business called Joe’s pizzeria. My skills in computer science have also helped me in my other hobbies, such as photography and video editing. For the latter, I made a light correction tool that can automatically color-correct a video based on the primer of a still image.

I believe that my passion for computer science, as well as my experience in the field, makes me an ideal candidate for a graduate program in computer science. I am excited to continue learning and expanding my skills in computer science so that I can make an impact in this field. For this reason, I am excited to submit an early decision application to your computer science graduate program.”

What should I do after I have my first draft?

After you have completed the first draft of your computer science personal statement, you should follow these steps to edit, polish, and finalize your computer science personal statement:

1. Check the word count : Most programs will give you a word or a page limit for your computer science personal statement. Make sure you stay within that limit, as going over it can make you seem like you can’t follow instructions.

2. Proofread and edit it : This step is crucial. A well-written and error-free computer science personal statement will make you look more professional and competent. Use spell check and grammar check , and then have someone else proofread it for you.

3. Ask for feedback : Once you’ve proofread and edited your computer science personal statement, ask a few people for their feedback. Choose people whose opinions you trust and who will be honest with you.

4. Repeat steps 2 and 3 as needed : After you’ve received feedback, make the necessary changes to your computer science personal statement. Then, proofread and edit it again. Repeat this cycle until you’re happy with your statement.

5. Modify personal statement for each program : Don’t just submit the same computer science personal statement to every program you apply to. Tailor it to each individual program, highlighting why you’re a good fit for that specific school.

6. Submit : Once you’re happy with your computer science personal statement, submit it along with the rest of your application.

Make sure you give yourself enough time to do all of the steps above so that you can submit a strong statement. Remember, this is just one part of your overall application package, so make sure all other elements are strong as well—such as your grades, letters of recommendation , and resume.

We hope that this guide has been helpful and that you feel more confident in your ability to write a stellar computer science personal statement. Remember, the most important thing is to be yourself and let your passion for computer science shine through. As long as you are genuine and articulate your interest in the field, you are sure to impress admissions officers. Best of luck!

Elmar Mammadov is a software developer, tech startup founder, and computer science career specialist. He is the founder of CS Careerline and a true career changer who has previously pursued careers in medicine and neuroscience.

Due to his interest in programming and years of past personal experience in coding, he decided to break into the tech industry by attending a Master’s in Computer Science for career changers at University of Pennsylvania. Elmar passionately writes and coaches about breaking into the tech industry and computer science in general.

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How to Write a Personal Statement for a PhD Program Application

Personal statement guidelines, general guidelines to keep in mind:.

• One size does not fit all : Tailor your personal statement to each program and department you are applying to. Do your research to learn what is unique about each of your choices and highlight how this particular program stands out.
• Yes, it’s personal : Showcase your unique strengths and accomplishments. Explain what influenced your personal decisions to pursue the program. Ask yourself, could this be applied to your friend or neighbor? If so, you need to be more specific and provide examples. Saying that you are a “good scientist” isn’t enough. Provide examples of your previous research experience, projects you’ve completed, and what technical skills you learned. Explain how you overcame any challenges along the way.
• Set aside enough time :  Although personal statements are generally short in length (approx. 700 words; 1-2 pages), give yourself ample time to write a strong, well-written statement. It takes more time than you think to develop a final draft for submission.
• Focus on your spelling, grammar, and vocabulary :  It’s important to present a well-written statement with good grammar and vocabulary. Write concrete, succinct sentences that flow well. Avoid flowery language. Visit the  Writing Center  for additional review and feedback.
• Proofread one more time:  Check your grammar and spelling again before submitting your final draft. Ask a friend, professor, or advisor to proofread your final draft one more time before sending it in. 

YOUR PERSONAL STATEMENT SHOULD ANSWER THE FOLLOWING QUESTIONS:

• Why do you want to complete further research in this field?  Write down a list of reasons as to why you are interested in pursuing further study in the field. When did you become interested in the field and what knowledge have you gained so far? Describe how your previous work provided the foundation and for further study.
• Why  have you  chosen to apply to this particular university ? Does the institution have a particular curriculum, special research facilities/equipment, or interesting research that appeal to you?
• What are your strengths ? Demonstrate how you stand out from other candidates. Highlight relevant projects, dissertations thesis or essays that demonstrate your academic skills and creativity. Include IT skills, research techniques, awards, or relevant traveling/ study abroad experience.
• What are your transferable skills?  Be sure to emphasize transferable skills such as communication, teamwork, and time management skills. Give examples of how you have demonstrated each of these with specific examples.
• How does this program align with your career goals?  It’s okay if you don’t know the exact career path you plan to take after completing your PhD. Provide an idea of the direction you would like to take. This demonstrates commitment and dedication to the program.

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES

For examples of successful personal statements, visit the  Online Writing Lab (OWL) .

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Writing Your Personal Statements

Your personal statement must demonstrate to the admissions committee that you have considered graduate school and their specific program seriously. It’s your opportunity to summarize your academic and research experiences. You must also communicate how your experiences are relevant to preparing you for the graduate degree that you will be pursuing and explain why a given program is the right one for you.

The personal statement is where you highlight your strengths. Make your strengths absolutely clear to the reviewers, because they will often be reading many other statements. Your self-assessments and honest conversations with peers and advisors should have also revealed your strengths. But you must also address (not blame others for) weaknesses or unusual aspects of your application or academic background.

Your personal statement should focus on two main aspects: your competence and commitment.

1. Identify your strengths in terms of competence that indicate that you will succeed in the grad program and provide examples to support your claims. Start your statement by describing your strengths immediately. Because faculty will be reading many statements, it’s important to start off with your strengths and not “bury your lede.” Consider traits of successful graduate students from your informational interviews, and identify which of these traits you have. These traits could involve research skills and experiences, expertise in working with techniques or instruments, familiarity with professional networks and resources in your field, etc.

• Check your responses from the exercises in the self-assessment section. You may wish to consult notes from your informational interviews and your Seven Stories . Write concise summaries and stories that demonstrate your strengths, e.g. how your strengths helped you to achieve certain goals or overcome obstacles.
• Summarize your research experience(s). What were the main project goals and the “big picture” questions? What was your role in this project? What did you accomplish? What did you learn, and how did you grow as a result of the experience(s)?

My research examines the interplay between U.S. domestic politics and foreign policy during the Cold War. As a native New Yorker, I saw firsthand how dramatically my city changed after 9/11, which prompted my early interest in U.S. policy at home and abroad. As an undergraduate at the City College of New York, I planned to study international relations with a focus on U.S. foreign affairs. I also quickly became involved in student activist groups that focused on raising awareness about a wide range of human rights issues, from the Syrian refugee crisis to asylum seekers from Central America.

The more I learned about the crises in the present, the more I realized that I needed a deeper understanding of the past to fully grasp them. I decided to pursue a PhD in history in order to gain a clearer understanding of human rights issues in the present and to empower young student-activists like myself.

— Vannessa Velez, PhD candidate in History

Addressing weaknesses or unusual aspects

• Identify weaknesses or unusual aspects in your application—e.g., a significant drop in your GPA during a term; weak GRE scores; changes in your academic trajectory, etc. Don’t ignore them, because ignoring them might be interpreted as blind spots for you. If you’re unsure if a particular issue is significant enough to address, seek advice from faculty mentors.
• Explain how you’ll improve and strengthen those areas or work around your weakness. Determine how you will address them in a positive light, e.g., by discussing how you overcame obstacles through persistence, what you learned from challenges, and how you grew from failures. Focusing on a growth mindset  or grit  and this blog on weaknesses might also help.
• Deal with any significant unusual aspects later in the statement to allow a positive impression to develop first.
• Explain, rather than provide excuses—i.e., address the issue directly and don’t blame others (even if you believe someone else is responsible). Draft it and get feedback from others to see if the explanation is working as you want it to.
• Provide supporting empirical evidence if possible. For example, “Adjusting to college was a major step for me, coming from a small high school and as a first-generation college student. My freshman GPA was not up to par with my typical achievements, as demonstrated by my improved  GPA of 3.8 during my second and third years in college."
• Be concise (don’t dwell on the issues), but also be complete (don’t lead to other potentially unanswered questions). For example, if a drop in grades during a term was due to a health issue, explain whether the health issue is recurring, managed now with medication, resolved, etc.

2. Explain your commitment to research and their graduate program, including your motivation for why you are applying to this graduate program at this university. Be as specific as possible. Identify several faculty members with whom you are interested in working, and explain why their research interests you.

• Descriptions of your commitment should explain why you’re passionate about this particular academic field and provide demonstrations of your commitment with stories (e.g., working long hours to solve a problem, overcoming challenges in research, resilience in pursuing problems). Don’t merely assert your commitment.
• Explain why you are applying to graduate school, as opposed to seeking a professional degree or a job. Discuss your interest and motivation for grad school, along with your future career aspirations.

I am definitely not your traditional graduate student. As a biracial (Native American and white), first-generation PhD student from a military family, I had very limited guidance on how best to pursue my education, especially when I decided that graduate school was a good idea. I ended up coming to this PhD in a very circuitous manner, stopping first to get a JD and, later, an MFA in Young Adult Literature. With each degree, I took time to work and apply what I’d learned, as a lawyer and as an educator. Each time, I realized that I was circling around questions that I couldn’t let go of—not just because I found them to be fascinating, but because I did (and still do!) feel that my research could help to bridge a gap that desperately needs bridging. Because my work is quite interdisciplinary, I strongly feel that I wouldn’t have been able to pursue this line of research without the degrees and life experience I gained before coming to this program.

— Jamie Fine, PhD candidate in Modern Thought and Literature

Statement of Purpose: subtle aspects

• Think in terms of engaging faculty in a conversation rather than pleading with them that you should be admitted. Ask reviewers to read drafts with this concern in mind.
• With later drafts, try developing an overall narrative theme. See if one emerges as you work.
• Write at least 10 drafts and expect your thinking and the essay to change quite a bit over time.
• Read drafts out loud to help you catch errors.
• Expect the "you' that emerges in your essay to be incomplete. . . that’s OK.
• You’re sharing a professional/scholarly slice of "you."
• Avoid humor (do you really know what senior academics find funny?) and flashy openings and closings. Think of pitching the essay to an educated person in the field, but not necessarily in your specialty. Avoid emotionally laden words (such as "love" or "passion"). Remember, your audience is a group of professors! Overly emotional appeals might make them uncomfortable. They are looking for scholarly colleagues.

© Stanford University, Stanford, California 94305

Sample Cambridge Personal Statement Computer Science

by Talha Omer, MBA, M.Eng., Harvard & Cornell Grad

In personal statements samples by university.

Cambridge is one of the most prestigious universities in the world and among the most competitive global schools.

The following essay was written by an applicant who got accepted to Cambridge’s Ph.D. program in Computer science program. Read her essay to understand what Cambridge is looking for in a successful applicant.

You might also be interested in reading this   Sample Statement for Ph.D. at MIT .

Sample Personal Statement Computer Science at Cambridge

Inquisitive minds foster curiosity, which in turn, breeds innovation. The scientific world labels this process, Research. I like to call it “Making a Difference.” Now the path toward such a defining milestone does not work out as smoothly as it sounds. I, too, faced my fair share of troubles along the way, starting with my diagnosis of Type 1 Diabetes. At the time, my world shattered completely. However, being determined, I re-programmed my internal GPS toward the stable ground. Somewhere along this stumbling journey, I came across the saving words of C.S Lewis: “Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny,” which eventually rescued me. Ever since, they have become my guiding light, rekindling the flame – never to give up.

I am applying to Cambridge University for a doctorate in Computer Science. My research interests include co-designing hardware and software configurable computer systems, performance optimization of processor architectures, and rapid prototyping through FPGAs. My curiosity in the field sparked when my undergraduate coursework exposed me to several important aspects of embedded systems and MIPS architecture. Throughout my academic career, I continuously pushed myself to raise the bar, eventually making it to the Dean’s Honor List and securing a 100% merit scholarship during my grad studies. Considering all that I have achieved, I am confident that I now possess the right technical skills and scientific approach, along with deep-rooted commitment and motivation to embark on a journey to explore this avenue in greater detail.

I passionately opted for an Electrical Engineering major for my undergraduate degree six years ago. For my senior year project, I was in a team of three who programmed and mapped a 5-staged MIPS single-core processor pipeline onto a Xilinx FPGA. The project initially came our way through a friend in contact with Dr. X, who, at the time, a post-doctoral research scientist at MIT, proposed this as a valuable thesis to serve as a strong foundation for future architectural development.

The aim was to design a basic structure that can be extended to a multi-core, fully functional embedded system in the future. We programmed the pipeline in VHDL and optimized it with a hazard detection unit, aggressive static branch prediction, and forwarding logic. We also built an assembler in C++ to convert MIPS-32 assembly instructions into machine language for the Instruction Memory.

My undergraduate degree fixated my attention on the architectural aspects of processors. It honed my practical skills through extensive lab work and semester projects necessary to be at the forefront of the subject. My 1.5 years of experience as a teacher assistant for many exciting engineering courses also solidified my concepts. It taught me various flexible yet effective ways to communicate ideas to my students in an impactful manner.

Subsequently, I spent the next two years at graduate school, attaining a Computer Architecture and Embedded Systems degree. It was a rewarding experience that expanded my horizon and reinforced professional bonds with contemporary researchers in the field. For my graduate thesis, I worked on extending the functionality of an educational simulation tool pioneered initially by Dr. X. The tool aims to complement graduate-level theoretical studies of MIPS architecture. The thesis entailed an intensive literature review into floating point instruction latencies and research into the possibility of increasing the throughput by reconfiguring the multicycle execution and memory stage. While programming in Visual Basic, I refined and simplified the user interaction experience by introducing a hierarchy of nested UI screens.

Further development of the MIPS FP simulator, the first of its kind in the reconfigurability of the pipeline it offers, is still underway before its release to the web. Along with working on the pipeline’s development and code optimization, I am also drafting a research paper for submission to the IASTED International Conference on Computers and Advanced Technology in Education. I believe that persistent thinking and hard work associated with extensive literature surveys embellished my research skills and taught me perseverance in facing challenges.

After graduation, I continued my quest to learn and enhance my software development skill set. As a Software Engineer at Apple, I am developing a front-end web portal on Google’s recent media hype structural framework, AngularJS. I have also worked with Dr. A to explore architectural aspects of Graphical Processing Units and GPU correlation with Operating Systems in general. In addition to building upon my problem-solving abilities and time management, my experience so far has required me to collaborate and brainstorm ideas in teams, hence polishing my team communication skills. This constructive training prepares me well for the rigors of practical life as a doctorate candidate at Cambridge.

My country suffers critically due to a deficit in employment and research opportunities in the local embedded industry. To add salt to the wound, the societal norms and traditions favoring the male demographics act as a taboo for the current aspiring generation of female individuals, who, despite all odds, relentlessly strive hard and stand their ground to stay above the murky waters. Being a member of society’s under-represented female faction, I possess this will of fire and inherent motivation to prove myself every step of the way.

The prospect of obtaining a terminal degree, from Cambridge, under the mentorship of world re-known faculty fuels my energy to dive deeper into the field of architecture and embedded systems, design innovative software/hardware solutions to intricate problems, and conduct meaningful Research. The program is an example of expanding my research horizons, strengthening my concepts, and increasing my experience through quality industrial and academic exposure.

I am much impressed by the current projects undertaken by the Artificial Intelligence Group and Computer Architecture Group at Cambridge. In particular, the work of principal investigators, namely Dr. A, Dr. B, Dr. C, and Dr. D, fascinates me in alignment with my interests. I believe working with them would be an invaluable, enlightening opportunity indeed. I am confident that the strong ideas I can bring to the table, backed by my well-founded academics and valuable experience, would benefit the Cambridge research community.

Upon completion of the degree, I intend to initiate various projects in conjunction with the R&D departments of the embedded industry. I also envision imparting education to young intellectual minds through technology. With it, I hope to develop e-learning web portals dealing specifically with educational simulation tools for the field of computer architecture and embedded systems. But I feel, from where I stand, that there is still a very long way to go, a journey that I am incredibly excited to embark upon.

WANT MORE AMAZING ARTICLES ON GRAD SCHOOL PERSONAL STATEMENTS?

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Sample MIT Statement of Objectives

MIT's graduate school requires applicants to write a statement of objectives, mostly for Ph.D. program. The objectives statement tells MIT why you want to do graduate work in your chosen area of research. The statement should contain technical jargon that reflects...

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Many applications will include a personal essay, in which you describe "where you're coming from" – your interests, why you want to obtain a graduate degree, career goals, and so on. To personalize your application, you may wish to state your motivations for wanting to do graduate work and describe any particularly formative experiences (for example, an undergraduate research project) that led you to decide to enter graduate school. The essay should be of reasonable length, commonly one or two pages; do not write an autobiography that continues for many pages. People screening these essays may have hundreds to read, and long essays are not generally well-received.

Also, check your spelling and grammar carefully. An essay that is full of grammatical and spelling errors can automatically doom your application because such an essay denotes carelessness and a lack of commitment to doing things well. Identify faculty members with whom you would consider working in your essay. This will help route your application to appropriate faculty members who will be reading through applicant files. Be sure to contact the individuals to whom you refer in your essay.

Personal Statement Resources

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USA Today: 10 Tips For Writing A Grad School Personal Statement

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Postgraduate personal statement example: computer science.

Although it’s been a while since I graduated, the passion to acquire knowledge has never ceased. Being a STEM educator, I had the privilege to constantly interact with students and learning community, who gave insights to look onto the latest trends in the field of science, technology and mathematics education. I acquired expertise to design curriculums, deliver differentiated inquiry based lessons for students coming from varied cultural backgrounds across wide range of educational programs.

By receiving Outstanding Teacher Certificate from Cambridge Evaluation Team and Certificate of Appreciation from School Head, I assured to deliver my duties with desired competence and diligence. While working as a full time math teacher and online instructor for almost a decade, I have had encountered several instances exemplifying the extravagant role of technology and computing. Designing lessons or schedules, availing advanced pedagogical tools, conducting virtual days or maintaining data for students’ progress, smart technology has played humongous role. I gained familiarity with the basics of data handling, processing and analyzing while managing students’ database as part of my career.

I wanted to know more about what goes behind the scene even while using mobile phone, social media or watching online lessons. Moreover, I believe computing is a powerful tool to engage effectively with the world. This has instilled a curiosity in me to explore computing specializations like Programming, Artificial Intelligence and Data Science. Passion in self-learning with solid research and inquisitiveness led me to attain working knowledge of Programming Fundamentals, Data Structures, Algorithms, Object Oriented Programming concepts, and also execute Coding, debugging and designing skills with Python, SQL and HTML.

Completed mini projects - Conversion scales, time zones, board game and DNA processing. I am also looking forward to gaining hands on experience by enterprising internship jobs either as an IT enthusiast, programmer or Data analytic. This will be certainly useful in acquiring peripheral knowledge; however I wish to attain more holistic education by joining master’s program at a reputed university to leverage my career. My future endeavors would be to take slight detour from my current career to establish myself in another exciting province, where I can blend my existing knowledge (in mathematics) with the expertise in programming skills to develop advance IT models.

Achieving distinction grades at school enabled me to build an integrated personality with a passion for learning and self-growth. Obtaining Master’s (Math) and Bachelor’s (Math, Electronics and Computer Science) helped me gain essential strategic and adaptive reasoning in the study of Algebra, Geometry, Statistics and Calculus, also the logic and problem solving approach in designing Algorithms and intuitive programming skills. I believe, Integration of mathematics with computing widens the scopes and facilitates challenging yet interesting opportunities.

The problem solving and analytical techniques in Operations Research fostered the logic and decision making, which I believe, is one key component for developing models in real world or an approach towards mathematical modeling. While reading an article recently , ‘Mathematical modeling for Covid19 pandemic - A comparative analysis’, I was intrigued by the coherence of mathematics and programming, which facilitates understanding evolution of pandemics, their statistics and implementing safety measures.

The analytical methods in problem solving approach could be beneficial for not only eliminating abstractness of math, but also solving certain existing issues required for a better human sustenance. “Computers themselves, and software yet to be developed, will revolutionize the way we learn.” – Steve Jobs. This has been manifested significantly by how humans have adapted exquisitely to changes in recent times.

During graduation, I was successful in leading group works like – Community Service Project, Computer Education Project, Personality Development and Communicating English project. The Leadership and Management Certificate course (CSML) from Harvard Business School online, taught me the aspects of management, multitasking and decision making from the perspective of a leader. Counseling Practitioner course, from Academy of Modern Applied Psychology, enlightened in me the importance of mental wellbeing and the associated human behavior.

I took immense pleasure in organizing workshops and seminars for a regional organization, as part of enrichment program to train educators in areas like – Teaching math to young learners, Educational psychology, Cambridge Checkpoint training and SAT Math. While all teaching lets sharing experience, online teaching gives the flexibility to do so at a global scale and convenience. I also strive to support learners struggling in studies or achieving desired grades, by conducting one on one tutoring sessions.

For the past couple of months while in quarantine, I learnt abundantly about health and nutrition. By doing cardio, strength training, cycling I was successful not only to robust my fitness, but also obtained positivism to take forward my journey to explore new horizons. I love watching movies, documentaries, listening music, travelling and exploring nature extensively. Sometimes I read blogs, books and the two most recent I could remember are, – Atomic habits by James clear and – Ikigai by Hector Garcia and Francesc Miralles.

I am a lifelong learner and takes pleasure in every opportunity to explore the world and its inhabitants. I believe there are no limits to what a person can accomplish; the only ones are what we create in our mind.

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Successful Personal Statement Example For Computer Science At Oxford

Last Updated: 6th April 2022

Author: Rob Needleman

• Computer Science

Table of Contents

Welcome to our popular Personal Statement series where we present an example of a successful Personal Statement, and our Oxbridge Tutors provide their feedback on it. 

Today, we are looking through a Computer Science applicant’s Personal Statement that helped secure a place at Oxford University. The Computer Science Course at Oxford is about understanding computer systems and networks at a deep level. Read on to see how this excellent Personal Statment gives attention to the mathematical side of Computer Science and showcases their achievements. 

Here’s a breakdown of the Personal Statement (the applicant came very close to the 4,000 character limit):

SUCCESSFUL?

The universities this candidate applied to were the following:

LOUGHBOROUGH

Enrolling on our Oxbridge Computer Science comprehensive Programme will give you access to Personal Statement redrafts. 

Your tutor will give you actionable feedback with insider tips on how to improve and make your Personal Statement Oxbridge quality for the best chances of success. Discover our Oxbridge Computer Science Premium Programme , enrol and triple your chances of success! 

Example Computer Science Personal Statement

My first experiences with mathematics throughout school were always enjoyable but not inspiring. While I loved working with maths, and enjoyed representing our school in both the UKMT and Hans Woyda team competitions, I felt that maths could not be the end-in-itself the school syllabus presented it as. As I progressed through secondary education, however, I began to really see it as the powerful tool to understand and structure reality that it is.

The first time I saw that my interpretation of the use of maths had some substance was during a work experience placement I organised at IMSO (International Mobile Satellite Organization). There I encountered some examples of the mathematical and computing problems involved in working with satellites: from the difference between the Euclidean geometry on a map and the Elliptical geometry on a globe, to the logistics of moving satellites around to meet demand while keeping them in orbit. These were problems that demanded much more than mere number crunching, and being exposed to this gave me a taste of what maths beyond school might involve. A second work experience spell at Siemens provided me a much more in-depth view of the important role that communication systems play in keeping a company running efficiently and effectively.

My passion for mathematics and computing was further extended while reading ‘The Magical Maze’ by Ian Stewart. The description of maths as the exploration of a maze of our own creation had an incredibly profound effect on my understanding of what research in mathematics involves. What interested me especially was the visual part of resolving problems, so that they did not rely completely on resolving long calculations. This was close to how I like to understand and explain my ideas in mathematics.

Douglas Hofstadter’s ‘Gödel, Escher, Bach’ gave me a much deeper understanding of the axiomatic systems that make up maths and how parallels can be drawn between different subjects to gain a further understanding of them all. Connected by the theme of Gödel’s Incompleteness Theorem, the author passes through seemingly unrelated topics, such as the problem of consciousness and the mathematics of Zen principles, to explain the theorem. Although not the focus of the book, I have also enjoyed reading the links that are presented between maths and computing; it seems to me that maths is not just related to computing – computing is the physical manifestation of mathematics.

Maths and computing are about describing mental processes in a precise, logical way. The rigour required for mathematical proof leaves little room for subjectivity: something can be proven, disproven or unproven, but this depends completely on the validity of your logic. The idea of being able to extract order from apparent chaos, working through concepts until they click is what I love about these subjects, and what has attracted me to take those as an integral part of my further education.

However passionate I am about my academic studies, I also enjoy being involved in extracurricular activities. As head of mentoring and a prefect, I have improved my organizational abilities working with staff and mentors in developing study programmes for those students requiring extra help. Completing the Duke of Edinburgh bronze award – now working on the silver award – has allowed me to practice and develop my leadership and teamwork skills.

In my spare time I enjoy playing tennis, skiing and swimming; the latter I practice at competition level. I also love travelling, as having spent my childhood in Denmark, Egypt, United Kingdom and Spain has given me a hunger for mixing with different cultures. I like to unwind by playing the piano – I find that the pleasure one derives from making a piece your own is one that few activities can match.

I am thrilled about the prospect of further study in these subjects with some of the leading professors in the fields, and look forward to participating in university life.

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Good Points Of The Personal Statement

This is a well-written, structured statement. The student explains their reasons to pursue a dual-honours degree and gives equal attention to both disciplines to which they are applying. The student adds personality to the statement by thoroughly explaining their own views on all of the examples of literature read around maths and computing.

Bad Points Of The Personal Statement

There are quite a lot of short paragraphs. The student could have saved space by consolidating some paragraphs into one, hence shortening the statement. The student starts three paragraphs with ‘My’ or ‘In my’. This is quite repetitive. There are too many paragraphs, seven in total. Paragraphs five and six could be shortened and grouped into one paragraph. In the third paragraph, it appears as though the student has either forgotten to add an addition space (in order to start a new paragraph) or has incorrectly started a new line for the sentence ‘Douglas Hofstadter’s…’.

UniAdmissions Overall Score:

This is a very good statement. The student has clearly achieved a lot and writes in a clear and easy-to-understand way. Attention is given to both maths and computer sciences, which is essential as the student is applying for a dual honours course. With some restructuring, this could be an excellent statement.

This Personal Statement for Computer Science is a great example of how to tackle applying to two different degrees or dual honours. The candidate’s interest and achievements are clearly shown which is vital to Admissions Tutors.

Remember, at Oxford, these Admissions Tutors are often the people who will be teaching you for the next few years, so you need to appeal directly to them.

You can find more successful personal statements and our expert guides on our Free Personal Statement Resources page.

Successful Personal Statement For Natural Science (Physical) At Cambridge

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Successful Personal Statement For Computer Science At Oxford

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Computer science personal statement

If you studied an unrelated undergraduate degree but have mathematical and analytical ability then you could consider an MSc in computer science

When writing a personal statement for a postgraduate course that differs from your undergraduate degree, you should:

• Make a strong case for why you are pursuing study in a different subject area, outlining how your previous academic experience has prepared you to switch disciplines.
• Consider the transferable and related skills which link your previous and future study.
• Highlight prior learning and experiences relevant to the course you are looking to study. This could include employment, volunteering, extra-curricular activities, completing online courses, attending events and conferences.
• Mention any further activities you will do before starting the course to fill any gaps in your knowledge.
• Show you have an in-depth understanding of the subject area, including the knowledge and experience you hope to gain and how this fits in with your career aspirations.
• Demonstrate that you have researched the programme and institution thoroughly. Highlight specific modules, practical elements, university facilities and unique aspects of the programme which attract you. Explain how the course aligns with your academic and career objectives.

This example should be used for guidance only. Copying any of this text could significantly harm your chances of securing a place on a course.

Computer science personal statement example

Despite obtaining my undergraduate degree in social science, I have developed a passion for technology and a strong interest in the world of computer science through my academic endeavours, extra-curricular activities, and part-time job.

My journey into the realm of technology began during my undergraduate studies, where I quickly discovered the analytical and problem-solving skills inherent in computer science were the very skills I was drawn to in the field of social science.

During the first and second year of my degree, I studied optional introductory modules in 'Computing Science' and 'Data Science', which sparked my passion for technology.

Thereafter, I sought opportunities to integrate computing techniques and mathematical approaches into my projects, demonstrating my commitment to acquiring the foundational knowledge needed for a successful transition to computer science.

As such, my dissertation explored 'Data-Driven Approaches to Social Policy Evaluation', investigating how algorithms can be used to analyse large datasets and measure the impact of social policies on various outcomes, including poverty rates.

Aside from my studies, I have used my extra-curricular activities to enjoy the practical applications of computer science. As a member of an ethical hacking society, I participated in hackathons, coding competitions, and collaborative projects.

The experience was transformative, allowing me the opportunity to apply theoretical concepts to real-world scenarios and nurturing my problem-solving skills. Joining the society complemented my part-time role during university as an IT assistant, where I witnessed first-hand the necessity for IT systems and networks to work effectively to achieve business needs.

These experiences across education and employment have motivated me to study an MSc in computer science, where I can delve deeper into a number of areas including programming languages, systems development, network security and algorithms.

The prospect of completing an independent project as part of the programme energises me to further enhance my practical abilities and contribute to overcoming complex challenges in the ever-evolving landscape of technology.

I am choosing to study the MSc Computer Science at X University due to the university's long-established international expertise in delivering computer science programmes, which is demonstrated in its recognition for research activities, particularly in the area of cyber security.

Due to this reputation, I believe X University to be the standout institution for me to advance my academic studies, as the department's ability to produce highly skilled and in-demand cyber security graduates matches my ambition in becoming a cyber security analyst.

Furthermore, I'm aware graduates of the programme at X University have transitioned to careers as applications developers, another career path I am keen to explore. The programme's engagement with leading organisations in the industry and the state-of-the-art learning facilities available to students has cemented my commitment to studying here.

Achieving an undergraduate degree in social science to now pursuing an MSc in computer science demonstrates my adaptability, resilience and commitment to personal and professional growth.

To prepare for this switch in discipline, I have engaged in self-directed learning by undertaking online courses in programming, data analytics and web development. This will ensure that I am well-equipped to tackle the exciting challenges that studying an MSc in computer science entails.

I am confident that studying at X University will provide me with an unrivalled experience, enabling me to progress to a fulfilling career in the field of computer science.

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Gre prep online guides and tips, 3 successful graduate school personal statement examples.

Looking for grad school personal statement examples? Look no further! In this total guide to graduate school personal statement examples, we’ll discuss why you need a personal statement for grad school and what makes a good one. Then we’ll provide three graduate school personal statement samples from our grad school experts. After that, we’ll do a deep dive on one of our personal statement for graduate school examples. Finally, we’ll wrap up with a list of other grad school personal statements you can find online.

Why Do You Need a Personal Statement?

A personal statement is a chance for admissions committees to get to know you: your goals and passions, what you’ll bring to the program, and what you’re hoping to get out of the program.  You need to sell the admissions committee on what makes you a worthwhile applicant. The personal statement is a good chance to highlight significant things about you that don’t appear elsewhere on your application.

A personal statement is slightly different from a statement of purpose (also known as a letter of intent). A statement of purpose/letter of intent tends to be more tightly focused on your academic or professional credentials and your future research and/or professional interests.

While a personal statement also addresses your academic experiences and goals, you have more leeway to be a little more, well, personal. In a personal statement, it’s often appropriate to include information on significant life experiences or challenges that aren’t necessarily directly relevant to your field of interest.

Some programs ask for both a personal statement and a statement of purpose/letter of intent. In this case, the personal statement is likely to be much more tightly focused on your life experience and personality assets while the statement of purpose will focus in much more on your academic/research experiences and goals.

However, there’s not always a hard-and-fast demarcation between a personal statement and a statement of purpose. The two statement types should address a lot of the same themes, especially as relates to your future goals and the valuable assets you bring to the program. Some programs will ask for a personal statement but the prompt will be focused primarily on your research and professional experiences and interests. Some will ask for a statement of purpose but the prompt will be more focused on your general life experiences.

When in doubt, give the program what they are asking for in the prompt and don’t get too hung up on whether they call it a personal statement or statement of purpose. You can always call the admissions office to get more clarification on what they want you to address in your admissions essay.

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What Makes a Good Grad School Personal Statement?

A great graduate school personal statement can come in many forms and styles. However, strong grad school personal statement examples all share the same following elements:

A Clear Narrative

Above all, a good personal statement communicates clear messages about what makes you a strong applicant who is likely to have success in graduate school. So to that extent, think about a couple of key points that you want to communicate about yourself and then drill down on how you can best communicate those points. (Your key points should of course be related to what you can bring to the field and to the program specifically).

You can also decide whether to address things like setbacks or gaps in your application as part of your narrative. Have a low GPA for a couple semesters due to a health issue? Been out of a job for a while taking care of a family member? If you do decide to explain an issue like this, make sure that the overall arc is more about demonstrating positive qualities like resilience and diligence than about providing excuses.

Specific Examples

A great statement of purpose uses specific examples to illustrate its key messages. This can include anecdotes that demonstrate particular traits or even references to scholars and works that have influenced your academic trajectory to show that you are familiar and insightful about the relevant literature in your field.

Just saying “I love plants,” is pretty vague. Describing how you worked in a plant lab during undergrad and then went home and carefully cultivated your own greenhouse where you cross-bred new flower colors by hand is much more specific and vivid, which makes for better evidence.

A strong personal statement will describe why you are a good fit for the program, and why the program is a good fit for you. It’s important to identify specific things about the program that appeal to you, and how you’ll take advantage of those opportunities. It’s also a good idea to talk about specific professors you might be interested in working with. This shows that you are informed about and genuinely invested in the program.

Strong Writing

Even quantitative and science disciplines typically require some writing, so it’s important that your personal statement shows strong writing skills. Make sure that you are communicating clearly and that you don’t have any grammar and spelling errors. It’s helpful to get other people to read your statement and provide feedback. Plan on going through multiple drafts.

Another important thing here is to avoid cliches and gimmicks. Don’t deploy overused phrases and openings like “ever since I was a child.” Don’t structure your statement in a gimmicky way (i.e., writing a faux legal brief about yourself for a law school statement of purpose). The first will make your writing banal; the second is likely to make you stand out in a bad way.

Appropriate Boundaries

While you can be more personal in a personal statement than in a statement of purpose, it’s important to maintain appropriate boundaries in your writing. Don’t overshare anything too personal about relationships, bodily functions, or illegal activities. Similarly, don’t share anything that makes it seem like you may be out of control, unstable, or an otherwise risky investment. The personal statement is not a confessional booth. If you share inappropriately, you may seem like you have bad judgment, which is a huge red flag to admissions committees.

You should also be careful with how you deploy humor and jokes. Your statement doesn’t have to be totally joyless and serious, but bear in mind that the person reading the statement may not have the same sense of humor as you do. When in doubt, err towards the side of being as inoffensive as possible.

Just as being too intimate in your statement can hurt you, it’s also important not to be overly formal or staid. You should be professional, but conversational.

Graduate School Personal Statement Examples

Our graduate school experts have been kind enough to provide some successful grad school personal statement examples. We’ll provide three examples here, along with brief analysis of what makes each one successful.

Sample Personal Statement for Graduate School 1

PDF of Sample Personal Statement 1 – Japanese Studies

For this Japanese Studies master’s degree, the applicant had to provide a statement of purpose outlining her academic goals and experience with Japanese and a separate personal statement describing her personal relationship with Japanese Studies and what led her to pursue a master’s degree.

Here’s what’s successful about this personal statement:

• An attention-grabbing beginning: The applicant begins with the statement that Japanese has never come easily to her and that it’s a brutal language to learn. Seeing as how this is an application for a Japanese Studies program, this is an intriguing beginning that makes the reader want to keep going.
• A compelling narrative: From this attention-grabbing beginning, the applicant builds a well-structured and dramatic narrative tracking her engagement with the Japanese language over time. The clear turning point is her experience studying abroad, leading to a resolution in which she has clarity about her plans. Seeing as how the applicant wants to be a translator of Japanese literature, the tight narrative structure here is a great way to show her writing skills.
• Specific examples that show important traits: The applicant clearly communicates both a deep passion for Japanese through examples of her continued engagement with Japanese and her determination and work ethic by highlighting the challenges she’s faced (and overcome) in her study of the language. This gives the impression that she is an engaged and dedicated student.

Overall, this is a very strong statement both in terms of style and content. It flows well, is memorable, and communicates that the applicant would make the most of the graduate school experience.

Sample Personal Statement for Graduate School 2

PDF of Sample Graduate School Personal Statement 2 – Musical Composition

This personal statement for a Music Composition master’s degree discusses the factors that motivate the applicant to pursue graduate study.

Here’s what works well in this statement:

• The applicant provides two clear reasons motivating the student to pursue graduate study: her experiences with music growing up, and her family’s musical history. She then supports those two reasons with examples and analysis.
• The description of her ancestors’ engagement with music is very compelling and memorable. The applicant paints her own involvement with music as almost inevitable based on her family’s long history with musical pursuits.
• The applicant gives thoughtful analysis of the advantages she has been afforded that have allowed her to study music so extensively. We get the sense that she is insightful and empathetic—qualities that would add greatly to any academic community.

This is a strong, serviceable personal statement. And in truth, given that this for a masters in music composition, other elements of the application (like work samples) are probably the most important.  However, here are two small changes I would make to improve it:

• I would probably to split the massive second paragraph into 2-3 separate paragraphs. I might use one paragraph to orient the reader to the family’s musical history, one paragraph to discuss Giacomo and Antonio, and one paragraph to discuss how the family has influenced the applicant. As it stands, it’s a little unwieldy and the second paragraph doesn’t have a super-clear focus even though it’s all loosely related to the applicant’s family history with music.
• I would also slightly shorten the anecdote about the applicant’s ancestors and expand more on how this family history has motivated the applicant’s interest in music. In what specific ways has her ancestors’ perseverance inspired her? Did she think about them during hard practice sessions? Is she interested in composing music in a style they might have played? More specific examples here would lend greater depth and clarity to the statement.

Sample Personal Statement for Graduate School 3

PDF of Sample Graduate School Personal Statement 3 – Public Health

This is my successful personal statement for Columbia’s Master’s program in Public Health. We’ll do a deep dive on this statement paragraph-by-paragraph in the next section, but I’ll highlight a couple of things that work in this statement here:

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• This statement is clearly organized. Almost every paragraph has a distinct focus and message, and when I move on to a new idea, I move on to a new paragraph with a logical transitions.
• This statement covers a lot of ground in a pretty short space. I discuss my family history, my goals, my educational background, and my professional background. But because the paragraphs are organized and I use specific examples, it doesn’t feel too vague or scattered.
• In addition to including information about my personal motivations, like my family, I also include some analysis about tailoring health interventions with my example of the Zande. This is a good way to show off what kinds of insights I might bring to the program based on my academic background.

Grad School Personal Statement Example: Deep Dive

Now let’s do a deep dive, paragraph-by-paragraph, on one of these sample graduate school personal statements. We’ll use my personal statement that I used when I applied to Columbia’s public health program.

Paragraph One: For twenty-three years, my grandmother (a Veterinarian and an Epidemiologist) ran the Communicable Disease Department of a mid-sized urban public health department. The stories of Grandma Betty doggedly tracking down the named sexual partners of the infected are part of our family lore. Grandma Betty would persuade people to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases, encourage safer sexual practices, document the spread of infection and strive to contain and prevent it. Indeed, due to the large gay population in the city where she worked, Grandma Betty was at the forefront of the AIDS crises, and her analysis contributed greatly towards understanding how the disease was contracted and spread. My grandmother has always been a huge inspiration to me, and the reason why a career in public health was always on my radar.

This is an attention-grabbing opening anecdote that avoids most of the usual cliches about childhood dreams and proclivities. This story also subtly shows that I have a sense of public health history, given the significance of the AIDs crisis for public health as a field.

It’s good that I connect this family history to my own interests. However, if I were to revise this paragraph again, I might cut down on some of the detail because when it comes down to it, this story isn’t really about me. It’s important that even (sparingly used) anecdotes about other people ultimately reveal something about you in a personal statement.

Paragraph Two: Recent years have cemented that interest. In January 2012, my parents adopted my little brother Fred from China. Doctors in America subsequently diagnosed Fred with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy (DMD). My parents were told that if Fred’s condition had been discovered in China, the (very poor) orphanage in which he spent the first 8+ years of his life would have recognized his DMD as a death sentence and denied him sustenance to hasten his demise.

Here’s another compelling anecdote to help explain my interest in public health. This is an appropriately personal detail for a personal statement—it’s a serious thing about my immediate family, but it doesn’t disclose anything that the admissions committee might find concerning or inappropriate.

If I were to take another pass through this paragraph, the main thing I would change is the last phrase. “Denied him sustenance to hasten his demise” is a little flowery. “Denied him food to hasten his death” is actually more powerful because it’s clearer and more direct.

Paragraph Three: It is not right that some people have access to the best doctors and treatment while others have no medical care. I want to pursue an MPH in Sociomedical Sciences at Columbia because studying social factors in health, with a particular focus on socio-health inequities, will prepare me to address these inequities. The interdisciplinary approach of the program appeals to me greatly as I believe interdisciplinary approaches are the most effective way to develop meaningful solutions to complex problems.

In this paragraph I make a neat and clear transition from discussing what sparked my interest in public health and health equity to what I am interested in about Columbia specifically: the interdisciplinary focus of the program, and how that focus will prepare me to solve complex health problems. This paragraph also serves as a good pivot point to start discussing my academic and professional background.

Paragraph Four: My undergraduate education has prepared me well for my chosen career. Understanding the underlying structure of a group’s culture is essential to successfully communicating with the group. In studying folklore and mythology, I’ve learned how to parse the unspoken structures of folk groups, and how those structures can be used to build bridges of understanding. For example, in a culture where most illnesses are believed to be caused by witchcraft, as is the case for the Zande people of central Africa, any successful health intervention or education program would of necessity take into account their very real belief in witchcraft.

In this paragraph, I link my undergraduate education and the skills I learned there to public health. The (very brief) analysis of tailoring health interventions to the Zande is a good way to show insight and show off the competencies I would bring to the program.

Paragraph Five: I now work in the healthcare industry for one of the largest providers of health benefits in the world. In addition to reigniting my passion for data and quantitative analytics, working for this company has immersed me in the business side of healthcare, a critical component of public health.

This brief paragraph highlights my relevant work experience in the healthcare industry. It also allows me to mention my work with data and quantitative analytics, which isn’t necessarily obvious from my academic background, which was primarily based in the social sciences.

Paragraph Six: I intend to pursue a PhD in order to become an expert in how social factors affect health, particularly as related to gender and sexuality. I intend to pursue a certificate in Sexuality, Sexual Health, and Reproduction. Working together with other experts to create effective interventions across cultures and societies, I want to help transform health landscapes both in America and abroad.

This final paragraph is about my future plans and intentions. Unfortunately, it’s a little disjointed, primarily because I discuss goals of pursuing a PhD before I talk about what certificate I want to pursue within the MPH program! Switching those two sentences and discussing my certificate goals within the MPH and then mentioning my PhD plans would make a lot more sense.

I also start two sentences in a row with “I intend,” which is repetitive.

The final sentence is a little bit generic; I might tailor it to specifically discuss a gender and sexual health issue, since that is the primary area of interest I’ve identified.

This was a successful personal statement; I got into (and attended!) the program. It has strong examples, clear organization, and outlines what interests me about the program (its interdisciplinary focus) and what competencies I would bring (a background in cultural analysis and experience with the business side of healthcare). However, a few slight tweaks would elevate this statement to the next level.

Graduate School Personal Statement Examples You Can Find Online

So you need more samples for your personal statement for graduate school? Examples are everywhere on the internet, but they aren’t all of equal quality.

Most of examples are posted as part of writing guides published online by educational institutions. We’ve rounded up some of the best ones here if you are looking for more personal statement examples for graduate school.

Penn State Personal Statement Examples for Graduate School

This selection of ten short personal statements for graduate school and fellowship programs offers an interesting mix of approaches. Some focus more on personal adversity while others focus more closely on professional work within the field.

The writing in some of these statements is a little dry, and most deploy at least a few cliches. However, these are generally strong, serviceable statements that communicate clearly why the student is interested in the field, their skills and competencies, and what about the specific program appeals to them.

Cal State Sample Graduate School Personal Statements

These are good examples of personal statements for graduate school where students deploy lots of very vivid imagery and illustrative anecdotes of life experiences. There are also helpful comments about what works in each of these essays.

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However, all of these statements are definitely pushing the boundaries of acceptable length, as all are above 1000 and one is almost 1500 words! Many programs limit you to 500 words; if you don’t have a limit, you should try to keep it to two single-spaced pages at most (which is about 1000 words).

University of Chicago Personal Statement for Graduate School Examples

These examples of successful essays to the University of Chicago law school cover a wide range of life experiences and topics. The writing in all is very vivid, and all communicate clear messages about the students’ strengths and competencies.

Note, however, that these are all essays that specifically worked for University of Chicago law school. That does not mean that they would work everywhere. In fact, one major thing to note is that many of these responses, while well-written and vivid, barely address the students’ interest in law school at all! This is something that might not work well for most graduate programs.

Wheaton College Personal Statement for Graduate School Sample 10

This successful essay for law school from a Wheaton College undergraduate does a great job tracking the student’s interest in the law in a compelling and personal way. Wheaton offers other graduate school personal statement examples, but this one offers the most persuasive case for the students’ competencies. The student accomplishes this by using clear, well-elaborated examples, showing strong and vivid writing, and highlighting positive qualities like an interest in justice and empathy without seeming grandiose or out of touch.

Wheaton College Personal Statement for Graduate School Sample 1

Based on the background information provided at the bottom of the essay, this essay was apparently successful for this applicant. However, I’ve actually included this essay because it demonstrates an extremely risky approach. While this personal statement is strikingly written and the story is very memorable, it could definitely communicate the wrong message to some admissions committees. The student’s decision not to report the drill sergeant may read incredibly poorly to some admissions committees. They may wonder if the student’s failure to report the sergeant’s violence will ultimately expose more soldiers-in-training to the same kinds of abuses. This incident perhaps reads especially poorly in light of the fact that the military has such a notable problem with violence against women being covered up and otherwise mishandled

It’s actually hard to get a complete picture of the student’s true motivations from this essay, and what we have might raise real questions about the student’s character to some admissions committees. This student took a risk and it paid off, but it could have just as easily backfired spectacularly.

Key Takeaways: Graduate School Personal Statement Examples

In this guide, we discussed why you need a personal statement and how it differs from a statement of purpose. (It’s more personal!)

We also discussed what you’ll find in a strong sample personal statement for graduate school:

• A clear narrative about the applicant and why they are qualified for graduate study.
• Specific examples to support that narrative.
• Compelling reasons why the applicant and the program are a good fit for each other.
• Strong writing, including clear organization and error-free, cliche-free language.
• Appropriate boundaries—sharing without over-sharing.

Then, we provided three strong graduate school personal statement examples for different fields, along with analysis. We did a deep-dive on the third statement.

Finally, we provided a list of other sample grad school personal statements online.

What’s Next?

Want more advice on writing a personal statement ? See our guide.

Writing a graduate school statement of purpose? See our statement of purpose samples  and a nine-step process for writing the best statement of purpose possible .

If you’re writing a graduate school CV or resume, see our how-to guide to writing a CV , a how-to guide to writing a resume , our list of sample resumes and CVs , resume and CV templates , and a special guide for writing resume objectives .

Need stellar graduate school recommendation letters ? See our guide.

See our 29 tips for successfully applying to graduate school .

Ready to improve your GRE score by 7 points?

Author: Ellen McCammon

Ellen is a public health graduate student and education expert. She has extensive experience mentoring students of all ages to reach their goals and in-depth knowledge on a variety of health topics. View all posts by Ellen McCammon

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FACT SHEET: President   Biden Takes Action to Protect American Workers and Businesses from China’s Unfair Trade   Practices

President Biden’s economic plan is supporting investments and creating good jobs in key sectors that are vital for America’s economic future and national security. China’s unfair trade practices concerning technology transfer, intellectual property, and innovation are threatening American businesses and workers. China is also flooding global markets with artificially low-priced exports. In response to China’s unfair trade practices and to counteract the resulting harms, today, President Biden is directing his Trade Representative to increase tariffs under Section 301 of the Trade Act of 1974 on $18 billion of imports from China to protect American workers and businesses.   The Biden-Harris Administration’s Investing in America agenda has already catalyzed more than $860 billion in business investments through smart, public incentives in industries of the future like electric vehicles (EVs), clean energy, and semiconductors. With support from the Bipartisan Infrastructure Law, CHIPS and Science Act, and Inflation Reduction Act, these investments are creating new American jobs in manufacturing and clean energy and helping communities that have been left behind make a comeback.   As President Biden says, American workers and businesses can outcompete anyone—as long as they have fair competition. But for too long, China’s government has used unfair, non-market practices. China’s forced technology transfers and intellectual property theft have contributed to its control of 70, 80, and even 90 percent of global production for the critical inputs necessary for our technologies, infrastructure, energy, and health care—creating unacceptable risks to America’s supply chains and economic security. Furthermore, these same non-market policies and practices contribute to China’s growing overcapacity and export surges that threaten to significantly harm American workers, businesses, and communities.   Today’s actions to counter China’s unfair trade practices are carefully targeted at strategic sectors—the same sectors where the United States is making historic investments under President Biden to create and sustain good-paying jobs—unlike recent proposals by Congressional Republicans that would threaten jobs and raise costs across the board. The previous administration’s trade deal with China  failed  to increase American exports or boost American manufacturing as it had promised. Under President Biden’s Investing in America agenda, nearly 800,000 manufacturing jobs have been created and new factory construction has doubled after both fell under the previous administration, and the trade deficit with China is the lowest in a decade—lower than any year under the last administration.   We will continue to work with our partners around the world to strengthen cooperation to address shared concerns about China’s unfair practices—rather than undermining our alliances or applying indiscriminate 10 percent tariffs that raise prices on all imports from all countries, regardless whether they are engaged in unfair trade. The Biden-Harris Administration recognizes the benefits for our workers and businesses from strong alliances and a rules-based international trade system based on fair competition.   Following an in-depth review by the United States Trade Representative, President Biden is taking action to protect American workers and American companies from China’s unfair trade practices. To encourage China to eliminate its unfair trade practices regarding technology transfer, intellectual property, and innovation, the President is directing increases in tariffs across strategic sectors such as steel and aluminum, semiconductors, electric vehicles, batteries, critical minerals, solar cells, ship-to-shore cranes, and medical products.   Steel and Aluminum   The tariff rate on certain steel and aluminum products under Section 301 will increase from 0–7.5% to 25% in 2024.   Steel is a vital sector for the American economy, and American companies are leading the future of clean steel. Recently, the Biden-Harris Administration announced $6 billion for 33 clean manufacturing projects including for steel and aluminum, including the first new primary aluminum smelter in four decades, made possible by the Bipartisan Infrastructure Law and the Inflation Reduction Act. These investments will make the United States one of the first nations in the world to convert clean hydrogen into clean steel, bolstering the U.S. steel industry’s competitiveness as the world’s cleanest major steel producer.   American workers continue to face unfair competition from China’s non-market overcapacity in steel and aluminum, which are among the world’s most carbon intensive. China’s policies and subsidies for their domestic steel and aluminum industries mean high-quality, low-emissions U.S. products are undercut by artificially low-priced Chinese alternatives produced with higher emissions. Today’s actions will shield the U.S. steel and aluminum industries from China’s unfair trade practices.   Semiconductors   The tariff rate on semiconductors will increase from 25% to 50% by 2025.   China’s policies in the legacy semiconductor sector have led to growing market share and rapid capacity expansion that risks driving out investment by market-driven firms. Over the next three to five years, China is expected to account for almost half of all new capacity coming online to manufacture certain legacy semiconductor wafers. During the pandemic, disruptions to the supply chain, including legacy chips, led to price spikes in a wide variety of products, including automobiles, consumer appliances, and medical devices, underscoring the risks of overreliance on a few markets.   Through the CHIPS and Science Act, President Biden is making a nearly $53 billion investment in American semiconductor manufacturing capacity, research, innovation, and workforce. This will help counteract decades of disinvestment and offshoring that has reduced the United States’ capacity to manufacture semiconductors domestically. The CHIPS and Science Act includes $39 billion in direct incentives to build, modernize, and expand semiconductor manufacturing fabrication facilities as well as a 25% investment tax credit for semiconductor companies. Raising the tariff rate on semiconductors is an important initial step to promote the sustainability of these investments.   Electric Vehicles (EVs)   The tariff rate on electric vehicles under Section 301 will increase from 25% to 100% in 2024.   With extensive subsidies and non-market practices leading to substantial risks of overcapacity, China’s exports of EVs grew by 70% from 2022 to 2023—jeopardizing productive investments elsewhere. A 100% tariff rate on EVs will protect American manufacturers from China’s unfair trade practices.   This action advances President Biden’s vision of ensuring the future of the auto industry will be made in America by American workers. As part of the President’s Investing in America agenda, the Administration is incentivizing the development of a robust EV market through business tax credits for manufacturing of batteries and production of critical minerals, consumer tax credits for EV adoption, smart standards, federal investments in EV charging infrastructure, and grants to supply EV and battery manufacturing. The increase in the tariff rate on electric vehicles will protect these investments and jobs from unfairly priced Chinese imports.   Batteries, Battery Components and Parts, and Critical Minerals   The tariff rate on lithium-ion EV batteries will increase from 7.5%% to 25% in 2024, while the tariff rate on lithium-ion non-EV batteries will increase from 7.5% to 25% in 2026. The tariff rate on battery parts will increase from 7.5% to 25% in 2024.   The tariff rate on natural graphite and permanent magnets will increase from zero to 25% in 2026. The tariff rate for certain other critical minerals will increase from zero to 25% in 2024.   Despite rapid and recent progress in U.S. onshoring, China currently controls over 80 percent of certain segments of the EV battery supply chain, particularly upstream nodes such as critical minerals mining, processing, and refining. Concentration of critical minerals mining and refining capacity in China leaves our supply chains vulnerable and our national security and clean energy goals at risk. In order to improve U.S. and global resiliency in these supply chains, President Biden has invested across the U.S. battery supply chain to build a sufficient domestic industrial base. Through the Bipartisan Infrastructure Law, the Defense Production Act, and the Inflation Reduction Act, the Biden-Harris Administration has invested nearly $20 billion in grants and loans to expand domestic production capacity of advanced batteries and battery materials. The Inflation Reduction Act also contains manufacturing tax credits to incentivize investment in battery and battery material production in the United States. The President has also established the American Battery Materials Initiative, which will mobilize an all-of-government approach to secure a dependable, robust supply chain for batteries and their inputs.   Solar Cells   The tariff rate on solar cells (whether or not assembled into modules) will increase from 25% to 50% in 2024.   The tariff increase will protect against China’s policy-driven overcapacity that depresses prices and inhibits the development of solar capacity outside of China. China has used unfair practices to dominate upwards of 80 to 90% of certain parts of the global solar supply chain, and is trying to maintain that status quo. Chinese policies and nonmarket practices are flooding global markets with artificially cheap solar modules and panels, undermining investment in solar manufacturing outside of China.   The Biden-Harris Administration has made historic investments in the U.S. solar supply chain, building on early U.S. government-enabled research and development that helped create solar cell technologies. The Inflation Reduction Act provides supply-side tax incentives for solar components, including polysilicon, wafers, cells, modules, and backsheet material, as well as tax credits and grant and loan programs supporting deployment of utility-scale and residential solar energy projects. As a result of President Biden’s Investing in America agenda, solar manufacturers have already announced nearly $17 billion in planned investment under his Administration—an 8-fold increase in U.S. manufacturing capacity, enough to supply panels for millions of homes each year by 2030.   Ship-to-Shore Cranes   The tariff rate on ship-to-shore cranes will increase from 0% to 25% in 2024.   The Administration continues to deliver for the American people by rebuilding the United States’ industrial capacity to produce port cranes with trusted partners. A 25% tariff rate on ship-to-shore cranes will help protect U.S. manufacturers from China’s unfair trade practices that have led to excessive concentration in the market. Port cranes are essential pieces of infrastructure that enable the continuous movement and flow of critical goods to, from, and within the United States, and the Administration is taking action to mitigate risks that could disrupt American supply chains. This action also builds off of ongoing work to invest in U.S. port infrastructure through the President’s Investing in America Agenda. This port security initiative includes bringing port crane manufacturing capabilities back to the United States to support U.S. supply chain security and encourages ports across the country and around the world to use trusted vendors when sourcing cranes or other heavy equipment.   Medical Products   The tariff rates on syringes and needles will increase from 0% to 50% in 2024. For certain personal protective equipment (PPE), including certain respirators and face masks, the tariff rates will increase from 0–7.5% to 25% in 2024. Tariffs on rubber medical and surgical gloves will increase from 7.5% to 25% in 2026.   These tariff rate increases will help support and sustain a strong domestic industrial base for medical supplies that were essential to the COVID-19 pandemic response, and continue to be used daily in every hospital across the country to deliver essential care. The federal government and the private sector have made substantial investments to build domestic manufacturing for these and other medical products to ensure American health care workers and patients have access to critical medical products when they need them. American businesses are now struggling to compete with underpriced Chinese-made supplies dumped on the market, sometimes of such poor quality that they may raise safety concerns for health care workers and patients.   Today’s announcement reflects President Biden’s commitment to always have the back of American workers. When faced with anticompetitive, unfair practices from abroad, the President will deploy any and all tools necessary to protect American workers and industry.  

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